Cara. Posted March 6, 2010 Seems like you all missed the point by about a mile The issue isn't the marriage, the validity of the woman seeking the divorce, the husband's character or lack thereof. The issue is that some wadaad told Chocolate she's going to hell. She's a good girl who listens to her mum and pays zakat promptly and is kind to orphans How dare this so-called sheikh imply her eternal rest will be somewhat... restless? Read the title people! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuugDheer Posted March 6, 2010 It’s really shame how some guys abuse the love the trust of their women, also whatever goes around comes around, she took a married man what expect in return Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
alisom Posted March 6, 2010 Interesting discussion! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted March 7, 2010 In my opinion, well you know its my opinion and am not gonna force on anyone else. But, am 110% against polygamy..and not to mention, like he was divorced man and she married him right??.. with me thats a big no-no...nin naag hore soo furay wuxuun baa ka qaldan..its just my opinion and I would always assume that he would also walk away from me (even thou that is not the case always am sure). So i would never be in that position and this story kinda justifies my position, the man in the story actually ended up marrying another lady...?? and the thing with raising the ex wife's kids? I think she should get those kids back to their mom who u said the kids were snatched from her? a mother deserves to raise her kids. Anyhow, if he isn't supporting her much? and he basically goes off with another wife? what is he good for? I definitely think she should divorce him and get a man who will help her out financially, and emotionally. I dont understand these shiekhs who always say you are going to hell? over everything?? lol no offense walahi bt odayashan yaa wax so baray...a man who is not supporting his kids? who married another wife? if the woman in this story cant handle that and doesn't feel the marriage is productive then she has full right to divorce him..and I remember reading a story abt a lady who divorced her husband cuz she wasn't attracted to him? she told the prophet whenever she sees other handsome man she feels that she married mid attractive aheen ......and the prophet scw told her its ok to divorce him......so if a marriage is not productive in many ways? in this case clearly he walks away and doesn't make money? maxa lugu falaya? naa bacda madow u tuur ku dheh balayo..and no she wont go to hell she will find a good man who will be there for the kids hope that helps salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hassan_B Posted March 7, 2010 ^this because many of the wadaads are devoid of knowledge and compassion. A friend of mind, a shaykh himself, told me about the story of his shaykh in the saharan desert. One of his shaykhs had his first child in middle age. This is because his first wife was barren. But for years he did not marry again fearing that this would hurt his wife even though she gave him permission. Finally, he gave in after his mother insisted and married again. This is a real shaykh, he was willing to never have a child again so that he would not hurt her. Obviously his Mom was very delighted with her grandson. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Maxaatiri Posted March 7, 2010 LOL @ Aaliyah...I dont think its a problem with polygyny, more so to with the old adage "If you give an inch, someone will take a mile", Im sure there is one for the metric system too. She gave her all to a man who wasnt worthy, of course he feels like he can take the mick. I would never pay a mans way for him, look after his kids, allow him to get away with not paying the bills...she was looking for trouble, but the only reason she is not screaming for a divorce is because she wants a return on her investment, someone should tell her that some ventures were ill thought out from the get go...and should be dropped ASAP to stop further hemorrhaging. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted March 8, 2010 Hassan I agree with you mashallah that shiekh must have been very compassionate. I can understand wen a man wants a second wife cuz his first wife can't have kids. That is justfied. (but xataa anigu hadan that situation ku jiri lahaa hypothetically speaking I would set him free..i dont share period but at least at that kind of situation I would not hold a grudge) Maxatiri loool yeah she did everything for him and he took her for granted...aduunku wixi n-cas ah buu ka faaideestaa.. salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Zack Posted March 8, 2010 Aaliyah, sharing is caring. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted March 9, 2010 ^May Allah swt bless you with four wives that don't mind sharing..ameen dheh Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Zack Posted March 9, 2010 ^Amin yaa rabb. My plan is to move to a Muslim country, that would make it even easier to accomplish. Hal xabbo won't just do it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted March 9, 2010 ^^best of luck... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Zack Posted March 9, 2010 ^Adigu gabadh wadaad ah baad aheyd why r u against the "mathnaa, wa thulaatha, wa rubaaca.."? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted March 9, 2010 ^a girl has the right to choose to be part of polygamy or not. It is a matter of choice. anigu kama helo laakin cidi ka hesha waxaan leeyahay ilaahay hani barakeeyo LOL salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
