Apparently I’m going to hell?

[Chocolate and Honey]

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Then one day she asked him and he said yes. He MARRIED another woman.

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and

 

quote:

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Then packed his stuff and left to live with his new wife.

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LOL@ looking for contradiction where there is none!

Go back and re-read the story. The married man started seeing another woman. Rumors started. But the wife refused to believe it. This went on for a couple years. She obviously knew he was somewhere doing something but she would make excuses for his absenses because he is a TAXI driver and he works nights, get it!

When she confronted him, he confessed. She wasnt obviously all smiles and congratulatory about it, so they fought and he LEFT for good to live with his new wife since they didnt have to hide it anymore.

 

Ibti,

She wants to be DIVORCED. He already hit the road. So it is my understanding that the MAN needs to agree and give her the papers in front of witnesses. If he refuses(which he did)she needs people who can Islamically get it done for her.

Can she Islamically say, "I'm done" and re-marry or do whatever she wants? I DONT think so.

[Ibtisam]

^^^She can, Get a normal shike/ center to give her the papers, he is just being xaasid, not because he wants her. There is no need for her to go to the local backward cultural Somali dude. (This is assuming she has not been with him for all those years behind your back (her hala booty call)and he gives her no money or support, then he has already given her more than enough time/ reasons. The time period is normally three months, you said years.

 

I have a feeling he has been coming home randomly though, he can't be away for so long and expect to still have a wife and the shike to agree with him? really. :rolleyes:

[Chocolate and Honey]

Yeah, he can! Ninkasta wuu yaqaana what kind of a woman he is dealing with. He obviously knows that she is the type to wait and that since he didnt divorce her, she is stil his.

 

Oh, I didnt know you can get it done without his consent.

[Ibtisam]

C&H is there is one thing I've learnt, it is never ever ever get involved in between couples. They fight and make up and destory everyone in the process, I have seen ones who end up in hospital (due to his beating) acting all mad and demanding his arrest and divorce and everything, you come back the next day to take their statement or take them to the station and he opens the door, and all is forgiven and well. All of sudden it becomes "Why are you trying to break me and my husband/wife apart"

 

Wa quudun is quudunsad married people and their problems, I never get involved, I just see what happens.

[Maaddeey]

^saasaan kaa rabaa, waa burisay dheh, intaasaa iga maqneeyd.. any way wax 'divorce'na aan ahayn oo 'Khulci' la yiraahdo ayaa Kutubta ku qoran, waxa la yiri: 'qof la rabo Minhaaj qiil loogama waayee' aniga iigu yeer Habaryar

[sheherazade]

If she hasn't had a shag in two years, she ain't married. Many times over.

 

Tell her to get some sense and a pit bull called Ball Cruncher.

[Abtigiis]

I envy men like this guy. I mean, some of us we do everything and still have to nurse petulant spouses. Sometimes I wonder whether it doesn't pay to just be a rolling stone habeen ba meel hor leh ka daga. Really, I think men like this guy ate blessed in this world if not the next.

 

C@H, adigu gabadh yar baad tahaye don't get involved too much into this. You never know what women in love are capable of. Me, I have once gave a good advice to a lady who was living with an abusive/wife-beater. Gabadha ayaan wax isu aheyn. And she confronted him and finally it was over between them. After a year or so, she travelled the distance between Malagasy and Moroni to ask for his forgiveness and blew my cover by saying "waxoo dhan ninkaas ayaa ka shaqeeyey". Nowadays, I hear from people that she still refers to me as "ruufiyaan xun weeye", isagaa i waalay. But the fact remains the man is with other two wives and she utters those words even when she is bearing freash bruises from the night before.

 

the antiqauted adage Naag caqligeedu wuxuu ku jiraa dabadeeba is valid at least for this case.

 

That modern girls like Naden object to this primitive maxims doesn't reduce its truism in large section of our society. They are pathetic lot!

[Sherban Shabeel]

I agree with Ibti. If this woman isn't your sister, or someone you grew up with, then don't get involved. You'd be surprised at how easily she can turn on you, and blame you for everything.

 

Wicked love such as this will consume anyone who stands in its path.

[Abtigiis]

Originally posted by sheherazade:

If she hasn't had a shag in two years, she ain't married. Many times over.

 

Tell her to get some sense and a pit bull called Ball Cruncher.

looooooooooooool@two years without shag! That is a BIG IF, I tell you. I also tell you if she doesn't have a shag for six months, she will reconcile with him and his other wife and accept him back.

 

On the alaab-cruncher things, alahay ka ala. I am hearing them today. Tolow ma farsamo aana la socon baa?

[Chocolate and Honey]

She is qof weyn so I never, EVER had a conversation with her about her husband.

I mentioned a couple of times that I know it aint my place. Ma hor boodayo ayada. But she is family(not immediate though) and she comes to our house crying and wutnot.

Now, if I was truly intervening or scheming ninkaas habeen danbe nabad ma ku seexdeen. But it is kind of hard not to say a thing or two when she tells us the crap she's been through. It boils my blood but I dont say much because a)she is way older than me, so xushmad baa jirto meesha b) I know if she really wanted to she could make his life not worth living and C)I hate lameness so I would lose my cool.

 

I guess my goal for the thread was to ask if a woman can get divorced without the husband's consent and to vent a bit about these called SHEIKHS :mad: who guranteed my residence in HELL.

[Blessed]

She helped him snatch kids from their mother? Habaar baa haya qofta.. She can do a khula or ball crunch.. Isagaa iska carari.

[Chocolate and Honey]

No she didnt. She was here responsoring him when he told her that his Ex left the kids and run off. She only found out the truth later that he snatched the kids from the other woman and threatened to send them back to Somalia if she didnt let him take the kids.

[Geel_jire]

A few months ago. I would written this off as a minor spat with some exageratino mixed in.

 

lakin I have been involved in 3 seperate mediation between couples in the last year or so .. and I was disgusted and amazed how some men treat their wives.

 

she has the islamic rights to request a divorce no sheik given these events should insist she stay with this guy.

[Blessed]

C&H. My bad. Some shaikhs particulary Somalis waan ka yaaba. It is amazing how they magnify the faults of a woman and but with raga hadaanu gaaloobin you should be praying shukr for him- never mind rights and responsibilities.

[Kool_Kat]

Where do I begin bisinkee?

 

1. What the hell was she thinking sponsering a man and his two children from a previous marriage?

 

2. Iyadoo Africa ka keentay muuba abuse kusii daraa sheekadaa?

 

3. Isagoo eyba abuse uga aamustay miyuu hadana shilinkuu shaqeeyay keeneyn? Iyaah!

 

4. Iyadoo hadana intaa dhan uga aamustay, he marries ANOTHER WOMAN? Xasha!

 

5. Worst of it all, she is cleaning toilets to support, not only their kids, but his kids from his ex? WTF!

 

 

All I know, if she wants to divorce him, she would have done it long ago, mar horeey ka faatixeysan leheed...And if she wasn't ready then, and is ready now, trust and believe, she wouldn't be listening to anyone! Not dariska, not friends, not family, not wadaad...

 

Aakhiraa lagaaga araa lagu yeh...Ee maxaanba aaqiro ku gaaraa mey dhahdo? :mad:

 

**Hadaaba sidan naar ku galeyso, bal iga siko anah, aan iski sii sheekeysano intii qolalkeena nalooga diyaarinaayo**