Paragon Posted December 21, 2007 Dictionary excerpts: Dead, adj.: Terminally inconvenienced. Death, n. : To stop sinning suddenly. Funeral, n. A pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker, and strengthen our grief by an expenditure that deepens our groans and doubles our tears. Ambrose Bierce Immortality: a toy which people cry for, and on their knees apply for, dispute, contend and lie for, and if allowed would be right proud eternally to die for. Ambrose Bierce Life: 1) a sexually transmitted disease with 100% fatality rate. 2) For Christians: a test before they are allowed to proceed to hell - for Buddhists and Hindus: the time between deaths. 3) Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans. John Lennon 4) Anything that dies when you stomp on it. Dave Barry 5) The confusing period between the confusion of birth and the confusion of death. Rudyh 6) A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay. Ambrose Bierce 7) Nothing but a competition to be the criminal rather than the victim. Bertrand Russell Youth: the best time to be rich, and the best time to be poor. Euripides I don't mind dying... as long as I don't have to be there when it happens. Woody Allen Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome. Issac Asimov A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams. John Barrymore Ageing isn't that bad if you consider the alternatives. Maurice Chevalier The average man does not know what to do with his life, yet wants another one which will last forever. Anatole France Do not seek death. Death will find you. But seek the road which makes death a fulfillment. Dag Hammerskjold You know you're old when the candles cost more than the cake. Bob Hope Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive. Elbert Hubbard Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough. Groucho Marx source Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
