Oz Posted November 14, 2010 Wacdaraha sxb knock on some doors here at SOL, look up the profiles if not married drop a pm. ..also I want to remind you they can get feisty. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ismalura Posted November 15, 2010 Originally posted by Oz: Wacdaraha sxb knock on some doors here at SOL, look up the profiles if not married drop a pm. ..also I want to remind you they can get feisty. Did any one get feisty on you? @ Wacdaraha adaa mudan walaalo. Trust me there is someone special for everyone but it will only happen when it is the right time. Zack's advice is based on xaasidnimo and distrust. Marry a woman in Africa and leave her in cidlo. Keep her there because if you give here the choice she will go 'bad'. It is against everything that marriage is supposed to be. Mida kale you don't have to go to a wedding to find a good woman; not many good things happen at Somali weddings at qurbaha. And lastly group blind dates aa? What kind of a woman will put herself in such a situation. Alla maxa wax walbe la arakay ! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Oz Posted November 15, 2010 Ismalurey do you want to get personal with me now? seems like you want to start a fight. . Ps: Wacdaraha a good example of how SOL ladies react look at the one above me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ismalura Posted November 15, 2010 Inadeerow hadeey wax lagugu dhigay do tell dee; we want to be entertained . Aniga dagaal ma aqanee lakiin qarxis baan aqaanaa, can you handle it? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Zack Posted November 15, 2010 Ismalura, how is that a bad idea bal? Aint marriage all about having children? War yaa nakala bixiyo gabadhan.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted November 15, 2010 marriage is not all about having kids. Even though true love happens after marriage there has to be something that u guys have in common (careers,goals etc) and that u are obviously attracted to each other.. at least that is my opinion. Also, what is a marriage if you are going to leave her in somalia and visiting her once every few months. That is not marriage in my book. But, if you plan to bring her to where you are and make it work..even then it is a little bit hard because you planned it like u went back for the simple reason to get a wife (like farxiya so doratay simply cuz she was the first lady that crossed ur path but if halimo or sucdi did then it wouldnt have made a darn difference lol)...I think you should just allow urself to find the right person...things happen when you leasst expect them.. salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Zack Posted November 15, 2010 ^Marriage is overrated, don't think too much about it. The main goal is to get kids, inta kale waa wax lagu qurxiyay. Career goals maxaa meesha keenay LOL, would it make a difference if one is a doctor or lawyer? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted November 15, 2010 ^ It is not important for the guy to be a doctor or a lawyer in particular. But, he needs to have a good profession to support and take care of his family. And, even if he is not there yet but inspiring to me xita wa wax dhan. Basically, someone who is working hard and knows that he has responsibilities. And, not just career but that you have things in common personality, likes and dislikes...someone you can relate to. not just any random person... tan kale maxa dhacay?? ma kuwa badan baa ku goyey oo maanta shekadu waxay taaganahay farxiya iska soo xareeso caruur dhaldhal...* u dont need to be so pessmisitc as to ohh marriage is just for having kids....kids are blessing from allah swt waana wax la jeclaado laakin guur oo dhan luguma saleen karo..they have their role/part.. Life will be worth it when you love ur husband/wife and your kids can see that..as oppose to tan waxa u guursaday in caruur dhasho uun..ur actions will speak louder believe me u cant hide when you are not attracted or love ur spouse..and that in turn will affect your kids... Sorry huuno we dont buy the whole thing of going back home and getting a spouse and this goes for both females and males. I seen in the past few girls who did that...I just don't see it working. Tan kale badana nimanka saa sameeyey waa kuwa qurbe faaido kulaheen..ma u maleesay markay somalia mid so khiyameeyaan in ay ogaaneen wuxu yahay..At first waa kii dabcan sharciga laha ee yaduba ku meel gadhasay laakin at the end bacda madow uun bay u tuuri... marka mesha jogtid ku qanac wa iga talo...somaliduna waxay dhahada qof wax ku siiye waad arki laakin qof nasixa ku siya ma badna salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Zack Posted November 15, 2010 ^The career thing is not on the table for many. Basically, a lot of girls/guys don't really care what their chosen one will do for living. I agree that the couple should have some common personalities but you won't really the person till you live with them. The Somali proverb "Qof ama jabo la deg ama jid la mir" comes to my mind. P.s. I am actually married for many months now. Adigu ka xaroo meesha Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted November 15, 2010 ^ lol@ ka xarow mesha ..we are not talking abt here being single as oppose to being married. But, rather whether someone should go back home to get married. If you went back home to get married and you think it is the right thing to do and have first hand positive experience with it then by all means do advice this brother but I dont see it working 98% of the time you are just exception to the rule but then again u said few months hmmm we dont know what the future holds lol not to be pessimistic or anything inshallah khyr ill add u in my prayers..u can use some duca lol..... caano iyo wiil iyo gabadhna hambalyo... salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ismalura Posted November 15, 2010 Originally posted by The Zack: Ismalura, how is that a bad idea bal? Aint marriage all about having children? War yaa nakala bixiyo gabadhan.. Maya huuno marriage is not just about having children. It is about love; wanting to be together as much as possible, taking risks on each other, having common interests and values (Like Aaliyah said) and most importantly caring about the other person. The whole idea of going to Africa is based on taking advantage off dadaka xaga jooga dibad jaceylkoda. The girls and their families have nothing say as long as it is a Farah coming from abroad. You don't know or love the person before you marry them because its all about the easy way out. Moreover it may be the easier thing in the short run but dad badan baa ka shalaayay gadaal; both the men here and mostly the women back home. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Zack Posted November 15, 2010 Aliyah, I did NOT go back to home to get hitched but again this isn't about me, this is about what is right for the starter of this thread. Adigaa isoo dhex galiyay markaa tiri "tan kale maxa dhacay?? ma kuwa badan baa ku goyey oo maanta shekadu waxay taaganahay farxiya iska soo xareeso caruur dhaldhal", taas uun baan ka jawaabayay. I still believe that getting married from home is a very good idea. Of course there is nothing that is 100% successful all the time that is why I advised the brother to wait till she has at least 4 kids before he brings her to the west. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Zack Posted November 15, 2010 Originally posted by Ismalura: quote:Originally posted by The Zack: Ismalura, how is that a bad idea bal? Aint marriage all about having children? War yaa nakala bixiyo gabadhan.. Maya huuno marriage is not just about having children. It is about love; wanting to be together as much as possible, taking risks on each other, having common interests and values (Like Aaliyah said) and most importantly caring about the other person. The whole idea of going to Africa is based on taking advantage off dadaka xaga jooga dibad jaceylkoda. The girls and their families have nothing say as long as it is a Farah coming from abroad. You don't know or love the person before you marry them because its all about the easy way out. Moreover it may be the easier thing in the short run but dad badan baa ka shalaayay gadaal; both the men here and mostly the women back home. Ismalura, I understand what you are saying walaashiis but I do disagree with some parts of what you said. The love, the caring, and many other things come AFTER the marriage. That is a proven fact. The shukaansi love aint the real thing. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted November 15, 2010 Aliyah, I did NOT go back to home to get hitched but again this isn't about me, this is about what is right for the starter of this thread. Adigaa isoo dhex galiyay markaa tiri "tan kale maxa dhacay?? ma kuwa badan baa ku goyey oo maanta shekadu waxay taaganahay farxiya iska soo xareeso caruur dhaldhal", taas uun baan ka jawaabayay. markaa walaalkaa waxaad ugu talinasa waxaad aduu naftaada aadan sameen...There is a hadith that goes love for your brother waht you love for yourself. marka wiilka ha waalin uma baahna mid africa joogta london ayaa gabadho wacan buuxaan..inshalah calafkisa wuu helaya.. sida iyo habeen wacan salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ismalura Posted November 15, 2010 @ The Zack I have heard many of my friends who give up on everything else and just want kids out of their marriage. I personally can't imagine spending the rest of my life with someone I am not in love with. Qofba wixii u shaqeeyo ha sameeyo lakiin to me marriage is so much more than having kids. @ Aliyah ninbaa maalin hore ila taliyay aniga; wuxuu yidhi guurkii meshan waa la af garan layahay ee Africa 'nin ka soo gado' LOL. Unless one has left someone that they love and are committed why take the trouble of going all the way? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
