Xafsa Posted April 15, 2002 If you are getting married to a guy would you prefer that he was sexually experienced or would you want him to be a virgin? As we all know sex before marriege is wrong..but when you are answering this question assume that the guy has repented from all his sins and is now a very sound muslim. PEace and luv Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 15, 2002 That's a good question. But where's your input...lol. Well me, I would prefer him to be a virgin...that way, I'd know that he's not carrying some disease. And also, since he is experienced,how would you feel if he starts comparing you to his previous partners. I don't know, but couldn't you get dambi for being with unchaste person since you already know of their status. (Not sure about this..gotta find out) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 15, 2002 just to the point i would like a guy who knows what he is doing....i don't want no american bie scenario hapening in my bedroom peace p.s his sins are for him to worry about and allah is most merciful.....if he rebented than that's all i need to know Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SCORPION_SISTA Posted April 15, 2002 lol xafsa looks like today is ur day. if this question was asked to me when i was a teenager then i would have said virgin all the way. But as i grown up i would have to say it doesn't matter to me either way. If he is experienced then he would know what to do (not just what to put where) and he would be the teacher (where questions and demonstrating activity is greatly enjoyed and welcomed!!!) and if he turns out to be virgin then that would be sweet but then it is time to get out the kama sutra book, it would be little bit slow at first u know reading and trying to implement it at the same time. okay i am going to stop here before......... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 15, 2002 LOL...u girls r so funny! I can't decide. On the one hand, as so many of u hav said, if he was experienced then he would kno wat he was doing....which would be good news 4 me! On the other hand though, waan wiswis badanahay, and the fact that I don't kno exactly where he's been and wat he's been doing turns me off. So I think I like the idea of learning and experimenting together better than the teacher/pupil scenario. Anywayz, wat's the probability of finding a virgin guy? Not high methinks! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 15, 2002 I agree with Indhadeeq 100% What he has done previously is between him & Allah (SWT) & if he has asked for forgivness already then no1 except Allah (SWT) would know whether he has been forgiven or not. Allah is Most Forgiving & Most Merciful! By the way for all I know, when 2 people get married they start a new life that means dat they've already left the past behind! At the end of the day sum1's gotta know whats happenin in de bedroom otherwise who knows what might be goin wrong? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Taqwa Posted April 15, 2002 With All do respect, are you gal's lacking the sense to answer a question using morals and ethics? Its mentioned in the Quran (4th Surah) that adultry is one of the major sins, that' is hardly forgiven. It is so severe that when a married person does it he/she should be stoned to death (buried upto their chest). If the person is not married he/she should be whipped 100 times. Usually people die without finishing the number of whips. Now since I have told you the extend of the punishment for being unchasted, let me remind you something. Any muslim who does not fear Allah is worth nothing, not even a penny. So why would you want to be with someone who is nothing in the eye's of Allah. He could be rich, handsome, etc, etc, but when the day of judgment come's he is worth less then the dirt in the ground. P.S. Usually sisters that are not virgins don't mind marry brothers that aren't. This should not be a personal choice but something important that should not be committed. Wallahi I hate adulters and if my own brother or sister was one of them, I would walk away from them forever. I don't care how beautiful you are, how rich, how charming, if your an adulter, the dog in the street has more respect from me. Cheers, Taqwa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 15, 2002 Hmmmmmm! Noticed couple of other similar(s*x) threads. Feels like am recovering from a long comma - somebody please tell me, Since when did our youngsters become so interested about this? Cajiib God Bless. ------------------ Live today to the fullest because tomorrow is not promised". Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hanna Posted April 15, 2002 Taqwa bro/sis i think you haven't read what the poster said ...in case you need clarification go back and re-read...also to do the 100 whips or the other punishment there have to be a muslim leaders that will do it...now tell me which country is governed with the true sharia...if someone repents to allah i think you shouldn't judge them on their past cuz god is the only that can judge pple p.s i'm not saying Zina is acceptable but we don't have to make the laws more complicated than they are Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 15, 2002 The rules are clear to a muslim, Zinaa is HARAM. Now if a sister is a virgin, then she deserves a virgin. Yet there are situations when a sister is approached by a man who's "experienced" and claims to have sincerely repented, what should she do? In my opinion....she should walk away. Its not about forgiveness, only Allah is the most forgiving. If u think u have the need to get married to this man, well you should take the time to really think about it. That's just my opinion. Personally, for me, HELL NO! ------------------ "My Umi says shine your light on the world..." Mos Def Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 15, 2002 i was wondering if a girl that never had sex can marry guy that did it all.....i mean makumehersamee...since the is ayah that says gabartii zinaystata waxaa loo baneeyey mid asna zineeysat or mushrik nin kii zinaystana sidoo kale thanx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baydan Posted April 15, 2002 Tawqa The poster is not talking about adultry she said somebody whose had sexuall relationship. Not particularly married which I know is equally sinfull but...again bro is not the case here.. If he is remorsfull about it..if it is something that happened one time..is ignorable by me. But if he is unapologetic arrogant and actually proud of his past escapades? That one I have to ditch. He Would not actually survive past the-gettin'-to-know-eachother sessions and you're talking about marriege. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 15, 2002 Methinks better the devil you know than the devil you don't...still waters run deep and all that jazz...if he's repentent and been HONEST enough to tell you what he's done and not lie about it...then that deserves consideration...I'd preferr that to a man-wh#re who claims to be as pure as the driven snow...until you catch site of all those genital warts and the like! The blind leading the blind sounds like snoresville to me...the idea of being "taught" by an expert sounds intriguing *shhh* though...not the most progressive of sentiments to have...I'm usually vocally snide about traditionalism...that can get tiresome after awhile though! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Xafsa Posted April 15, 2002 I for one would love to be my husbands first...but then again the thought of having a man that is good at what he is doing is tempting..but i would go for a virgin. I know he hasn;t sinned in that way, and he sees and undertands how great a sin zinnah is..and that is priceless! peace Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 15, 2002 naayaa xafso.....waa ogaa ninkaas foolka dheer inuu ku poison gareynaayo... meeqaan ku dhahaayey, wuxuu madax tareen l ayahuu qabaa......ee agtiisa ka fako...naayaa...hadaanan habarta kuugu miineynin waa arki doontaa.....urtoooooooooooooy.....lol.. Seriously I could care less...coz, if he is experienced than good.. if not than I will teach him...from what I learned watching porno Taqwa: hayee buruskaada ha ii qaadan yaah....its just humor...nothing real! ------------------ Each one of us is a masterpiece in progress Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites