BACKED BEANS

[Jacaylbaro]

One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love.

When it became apparent that we would marry, I made

the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.

 

Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke

down on the way home from work. Since I lived in the

countryside I called my husband and told him that I

would be late because I had to walk home. On my way,

I passed by a small diner and the odor of baked

beans was more than I could stand.

 

With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk

off any ill effects by the time I reached home, so

I stopped at the diner and before I knew it, I had

consumed there large orders of baked beans. All the

way home, I made sure that I released all the gas.

 

Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to

see me and exclaimed delightedly: "Darling I have a

surprise for dinner tonight." He then blindfolded me

and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a

seat and just as he was about to remove my

blindfold, the telephone rang.

 

 

He made me promise not to touch the blindfold

until he returned and went to answer the call.

 

The baked beans I had consumed were still

affecting me and the pressure was becoming most

unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room

I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one

leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it

smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk

in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from

my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously.

Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off

three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage.

Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation

in the other room, I went on like this for another

few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable. When

eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end

of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more

times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and

folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and

pleased with myself. My face must have been the

picture of innocence when my husband returned,

apologizing for taking so long.

 

He asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold,

and I assured him I had not. At this point, he

removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests

seated around the table chorused: "Happy Birthday!"

 

I fainted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Ms DD]

lol @ great punchline.

[Sacdiya]

jacaylbaro

 

loooooooooool, that is hilarious I'm dying that was sick. two thumbs up

[Som@li]

LOL. GOOD ONE

[haldhaa]

HAhahahahahaah kkkkkkkkkk hhhhhhhh brrrrrrrrrbbbbr that's veldig morsom I so the film but it was the other way around but it's still funny lol 4 thumbs up bro kaxkaxkaaxkaxkaxkaaaax sidan u qoslaye ayaanba hergab ka qaaday

[murefu]

kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

[SoMa_InC]

lol

 

Good one!

[Sumaya3]

hahahahaa kkkkkkkkkkkk that was hilarious!

[Khalaf]

happy shiting