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- Femme -

PMS

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THE HORMONE WARNING:

>The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the

>month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes

>his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as

>common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend,

>or significant other!

>DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?

>SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?

>SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?

>ULTRASAFE: Have some chocolate

>

>DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?

>SAFER: Wow, you look good in brown.

>SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!

>ULTRASAFE: Have some chocolate

>

>DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?

>SAFER: Could we be overreacting?

>SAFEST: Here's my paycheck.

>ULTRASAFE: Have some chocolate

>

>DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?

>SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.

>SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?

>ULTRASAFE: Have some chocolate

>

>DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?

>SAFER: I hope you didn't over-do it today.

>SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!

>ULTRASAFE: Have some more chocolate.

>

>Subject: PMS

>

>13 Things PMS Stands For

>

>1. Pass My Shotgun

>2. Psychotic Mood Shift

>3. Perpetual Munching Spree

>4. Puffy Mid-Section

>5. People Make me Sick

>6. Provide Me with Sweets

>7. Pardon My Sobbing

>8. Pimples May Surface

>9. Pass My Sweatpants

>10. Pissy Mood Syndrome

>11. Plainly; Men Suck

>12. Pack My Stuff

>And my favorite one...

>13. Potential Murder Suspect

>

>Pass this on to all of your hormonal friends and those who

>might need a good Laugh!

>Or men who need a warning.

>

And remember: Money talks.... But Chocolate sings

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