Jerk Therapy

[Baashi]

Jerk Therapy

For all of you who occasionally have a reality bad day, and you just need to take it on someone don’t take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don’t know. I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I had forgotten to make. I found the number, and dialed it.

 

A man answered saying “Hello?†Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn’t believe that anyone could be so rude.

 

I tracked down Robin’s correct number and called her. (I had transposed the last two digits of her phone number). After hanging up with her I decided to call the ‘wrong number again. When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled, “You’re a jerk!†and hang up. I wrote his number down with the word ‘jerk’ next to it and put in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I’d call him. He’d answer and I’d yell. “You’re a jerk!†It always cheered me up.

 

When caller ID came to our area I thought my therapeutic ‘jerk’ calling would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, “Hi, this is John Smith from the Telephone Company. I’m just calling to see if you’re familiar with the caller ID program?†he yelled, “no!†and slammed the phone down. I quickly him back and said, “That’s because you’re a jerk!â€

 

One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot. Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I had been waiting for the spot. The ***** ignored me. I noticed a “For Sale†sign in his car window, so I wrote down his number.

 

A couple of days later, right after calling the first jerk (I had his number on speed dial), I thought I had better call the BMW jerk, too. I dialed and someone said, “Hello?†I said, “Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?†“Yes it is.†“Can you tell me where I can see it?†“Yes I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It’s a yellow house and the car’s parked right out front.†“What’s your name?†I asked. “My name is Don Hansen,†he said. “When’s a time to catch you, Don?†“I’m home every evening after five.†“Listen, Don, can I tell you something?†“Yes?†“Don, you are a jerk!†Then I hang up. And added his number to my speed dial, too.

 

Now, when I had a problem,, I had two jerks to call. But after several months of calling them, it wasn’t as enjoyable as it used to be. So I came up with an idea: I called jerk #1 “Hello†“You’re jerk!†I shouted, but I didn’t hang up. “Are you still there?†he asked. “Yeah,†I said. “Stop calling me!†he screamed. “Make me,†I said. “Who are you?†he asked.

 

“You’ll what?†I said.

 

“I’ll kick your #@!,†he exclaimed.

 

I answered, “Well, jerk, here’s your chance. I’m coming over right now.â€

 

Then, I hung up, and immediately called the police saying that I lived at 1802 West34th Street, and I was on my way over there to kill my gay lover. Then, I called Channel 13 news about the gang war going down on West 34th Street.

 

I quickly got into my car and headed over to 34th St. There, I saw two jerks beating the #@%! Out of each other in front of 6 squad cars, a police helicopter, and a news crew.

 

Now I feel better.

 

Text from tidbits (Fever Cabin)…local free ad paper.

[checkmate]

Text from tidbits (Fever Cabin)…local free ad paper.

looooooooooooooooooooooool......shooooooooooot maan and here i was thinking neva ta get on ur bad side.......crank caller...baller....shot caller

 

asxantu

[dawoco]

oh my god, that was funny,,,Baashi i always thought of you as the repectable mild mannerd nomad, well, a mistake no never b made again...

 

Don, you are a jerk!†Then I hang up. And added his number to my speed dial, too.

loooool,,,what a good way to use ur speed dialer

[Sincere]

I called jerk #1 “Hello†“You’re jerk!†I shouted, but I didn’t hang up. “Are you still there?†he asked. “Yeah,†I said. “Stop calling me!†he screamed. “Make me,†I said. “Who are you?†he asked.

LMAO ..it must have been therapeutic for both of them

[Baashi]

Dawaco n Shoo inna Baro...don't stretched folks

[SCORPION_SISTA]

N.M.