I'm Buying Liverpool

[Thierry.]

It has come to my attention that one of the historically great clubs is on the brink of dropping out of the club of elites. Liverpool dominated football both domestically and Europe in the 1980’s. Today the club is a sad case of mismanagement of resources, incompetent manager, despondent fans and passionless players.

 

I am opening up a investment fund in Luxembourg (for obvious tax reasons) called Red Sea Capital serving as asset manager for the Somalis in Diaspora. My team is currently in negotiation with over a thousand Hagbad’s, with the intention of using the fund in the pots for my proposed deal as opposed to building that house in Hargaisa, or buying that Lorry for Kenya.

 

My Proposal

 

Finances

I need to raise (Eur) 200 Million.

 

• (Eur) 50 Million – Hagbad

• (Eur) 50 Million – 2 Wealthy Arab Families in Jeddah and Al Ain.

• (Eur) 100 Million – Investment Banks (UBS and JP Morgan have shown significant interest)

 

Morgan Stanley will lead a consortium of advisors in the Acquisition

 

Allen & Overy – Legal advisor

 

Operation

Appoint Stuart Rose ( Head of Marks & Spencer) CEO

 

Sack Rafael Benitez

 

Bring in Frank Rijkard – Explain to him that there isn’t a lot of transfer kit to work with but you can formulate a fantastic scouting system similar to Wenger strategy and those young guns will come to age in the near future, or if you want to (no pressure) sell the buggers for $$$$$$$.

 

Debt

We shall restructure our debt, Royal bank of Scotland will be the preferred bank, We will ask for an extension of 2020 be made for repayment.

 

Player Transfers.

• Gerrard – Out 40 Million to Inter Milan

• Torres – Out 70 Million to Manchester City

• Anyone with a salary over £40,000 a week will either reduce his salary or join the prima donnas above.

 

2020

We shall sell the Club to the Nahyan Family for (Eur) 600 Million.

[NGONGE]

^^

[Cawaale]

^Buy Arsenal, Wenger needs to get new players especially a new mid field, defence and striker, you know what? pretty much the whole damn team needs to be changed even the coach. So buy Aresenal FC and i can assure you all the Somalis out there will contribute even you can have 2 hours two hours fundraising event on universal tv

[Complicated]

Thiery: I am willing to invest all my 'hagbab' earnings (I pay £50 a month so surely I am expecting a lot come my turn) in exchange for one thing, to wear the red shirt and captain the team. Deal?

[Thierry.]

^^ Complicated read the part advising Rijkard to focus on the youth system. Now knowing that you joined in 2002 at youngest you were 18, jump 8 years, you know where i am going with this.

 

Hovwever we thank you for your money

[Complicated]

In other words cajuus baan ahay baad leedahay

 

O well for the love of the cunsuri invested reds, I will part with my hard earned hagbad.

[Oz]

Haha.. Thiery.

 

I think the new owners would want stability and also the fact if they got rid of Rafa, there is a good chance Reina and Torres (Torres most likely to Chelski) might want to follow him out the door.

[N.O.R.F]

LoooL

 

Give me the contract for the stadium. Leather massage chairs at the Kop end, an automatic trap door under the technical area for when the gaffa needs to leave or for Jose's return, the tunnel will have toxic air conditioning on the away side and the home team will have listening devices to listen to the away team's team talks.

 

Ps not paying a penny! They owe me the *****.

[Thierry.]

^^ Saxiib we are trying to cut costs and you want to build a new stadium.

 

Some profit making schemes.

 

• Change the kit twice a season.

• Spend 5 months in the Far East for promotion.

• Bring Robbie Fowler back as turnstile operator(Charging £50 extra at his booth)

[N.O.R.F]

@Fowler

 

Change the kit twice a year? There is a economic crisis going on saxib. Scousers can only do so much with their dole cheques

[FatB]

lols at 50 mill hagbad! btw 800mill is the asking price...