Iffah Posted August 29, 2003 Kids Say the Darnest Things... TEACHER : Why are you late? WEBSTER : Because of the sign. TEACHER : What sign? WEBSTER : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow." TEACHER : Cindy, why are you doing your math sums on the floor? CINDY : You told me to do it without using tables! TEACHER : John, how do you spell "crocodile"? JOHN : K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L" TEACHER : No, that's wrong JOHN : Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it! TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water? SARAH : H I J K L M N O !! TEACHER : What are you talking about? SARAH : Yesterday you said it is H to O! TEACHER : George, go to the map and find North America. GEORGE : Here it is! TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? CLASS : George! TEACHER : Willy, name one important thing we have today that we didn't Have ten years ago. WILLY : Me! TEACHER : Tommy, why do you always get so dirty? TOMMY : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are. TEACHER : Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I". ELLEN : I is... TEACHER : No, Ellen. Always say, "I am." ELLEN : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet." TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?" JOHNNY : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time." TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?" JOHNNY : "Because George still had the axe in his hand." TEACHER : Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating? SAM : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook. TEACHER : Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same asYour brother's. Did you copy his? DESMOND : No, teacher, it's the same dog! TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? STUDENT : A teacher. SILVIA : Dad, can you write in the dark? FATHER : I think so. What do you want me to write? SYLVIA : Your name on this report card. ********** MY FOOTSTEPS? An acquaintance of mine who is a physician told this story about her then-four-year-old daughter. On the way to preschool, the doctor had left her stethoscope on the car seat, and her little girl picked it up and began playing with it. Be still, my heart, thought my friend, my daughter wants to follow in my footsteps! Then the child spoke into the instrument: "Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order?" A WISE LITTLE GIRL A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I'm Mr.. Sugarbrown's daughter." Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say, "I'm Jane Sugarbrown." The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and said, "Aren't you Mr.. Sugarbrown's daughter?" She replied, "I thought I was, but mother says I'm not." TOO ROUGH A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the boys?" Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough." The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked, "If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?" THUMB SUCKING A boy had reached four without giving up the habit of sucking his thumb, though his mother had tried everything from bribery to reasoning to painting it with lemon juice to discourage the habit. Finally she tried threats, warning her son that, "If you don't stop sucking your thumb, your stomach is going to blow up like a balloon." Later that day, walking in the park, mother and son saw a pregnant woman sitting on a bench. The four-year-old considered her gravely for a minute, then spoke to her saying, "Uh-oh ... I know what *you've* been doing." THE LORD'S PRAYER A mother was teaching her 3-year-old the Lord's prayer. For several evenings at bedtime she repeated it after her mother. One night she said she was ready to solo. The mother listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word, right up to the end of the prayer. "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us some e-mail, Amen." SO KEEP THE SINGING DOWN, OK? A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church? "One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping." THE PRESSED LEAF A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, he looked at the old pages as he turned them. Then something fell out of the Bible and he picked up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that has been pressed in between pages. "Momma, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked. With astonishment in the young boy's voice he answered: It's Adam's suit!!!!!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Captivating_SouL Posted September 2, 2003 TEACHER : George, go to the map and find North America. GEORGE : Here it is! TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? CLASS : George! lol it was too cute...by far Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Macalin Posted September 2, 2003 - i just cant help smiling! <^^needs this after a hectic week! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miriam1 Posted September 3, 2003 LoL cute kids Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
