Nice Shoes

[underdog]

A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.

 

After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!"

 

The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!" Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator.

 

Later in the day, the shopkeeper was driving home, when he spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he saw a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She took aim, killed the creature, and with a great deal of effort hauled it on to the swamp bank. Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watched in amazement. Just then the blonde flipped the alligator on its back, and frustrated, shouts out, "Damn it, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!"

[SCORPION_SISTA]

lol lol lol that's really funny.

i don't know if u heard other blonde jokes but here are some i remember right now:

1.she thought that boyzIImen was a daycare center.

2.she missed bus 44 so she took bus 22 twice.

3.she got stabbed in a shootout.

4.she heard that most of the crimes are committed in homes so she moved out.

5.she told her boyfriend to meet her at the corner of "walk and don't walk"

 

i will check my e-mail and see if i got some more.

[SCORPION_SISTA]

MIGHT NOT BE APPROPRIATE TO ALL AUDIENCE. But these are some questions asked to blonde:

 

1. What can Life Savers do that men cannot?

Answer: Come in five flavors

2. What is the ultimate rejection?

Answer: When your m*st*r*ating and your hand falls asleep

3. What did Bill Clinton say to Monica?

Answer: I told you to li*k my erection, not wreck my election.

4.What does pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common?

Answer: Both can smell it but can't eat it

5. What do you call a group of blondes on roller skates?

Answer: A mobile sperm bank.

6. What do you call a blonde with a dollar bill over her head?

Answer: All you can eat for under a buck.

7. What do you do with 365 used rubbers?

A. Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.

Q. What's the difference between sin and shame?

A. It is a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out.

8. What's the speed limit of sex?

A. 68; at 69 you have to turn around.

9. Why is air a lot like sex?

A. Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.

10: Why are Monica Lewinsky's cheeks so puffy?

A: She's withholding evidence

Q: What's the difference between light and hard?

A. You can sleep with a light on.

Q: Why do women rub their eyes when they get out of bed?

A. Because they don't have balls to scratch.

Q. Why is sex like a bridge game?

A. You don't need a partner if you have a good hand.

Q. What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common?

A. Their balls are just for decoration.

[Lefty]

LOOOOOOOL@Scorpian... That was hell of a collection. Good one!