What does it mean to be a man?

[Wadani]

Men and women are not equal ee sidaa ula soco.

[Alpha Blondy]

Reeyo;950289 wrote:

Al- Using the above, would you say it's time to redefine the Somali man identity?

 

If so how and what?

i think its a ''generational'' thing. but, certainly a man's sense of value comes from his ability to provide. maintaining a job is really important. a man MUST provide.

 

Allow ceebta ragaa somaaliyeed astur and xidhiika bulsho weyntanaa xooji. amiin.

[Reeyo]

Wadani;950299 wrote:

Men and women are not equal ee sidaa ula soco.

I never said they were. Seriously Wadani.

[underdog]

Reeyo;950284 wrote:

I think the leadership quality has been trialed by women and it has shown itself to be a unisex quality and in fact in modern times women seem to embody the concept much better with results of quality standards higher for the family.

 

So Underdog do add your two pence.

Therein lies the problem Reeyo. Gender roles have been blurred. Just because women CAN lead doesn't mean they SHOULD lead. I understand the reverse may be true and each case should be viewed on its own merits.

 

Women who can do everything men can do seem to have lost their femininity and they have a mistaken theory as to why men are not attracted to them. The most common delusion is "he can't handle a strong independent woman".

 

It may come as no surprise that men like doe-eyed women who need us to open jars and slay dragons.

 

"Femininity is a gentle tender quality found in a woman's appearance, manner and nature. A feminine woman gives the impression of softness and delicateness. She has a spirit of sweet submission, and a dependency upon men for their care and protection. Nothing about her appears masculine, no male aggressiveness, competence, efficiency, fearlessness, strength, or the ability to kill her own snakes."

[underdog]

Alpha Blondy;950285 wrote:

there's a crises of sorts facing the somali man since the

'troubles'

- 1977-present

 

its quiet pitiful to see a 40+ year old Somali man who faces the following problems:

 

1. unemployed and whose role as the head of the household is replaced by welfare and hand-outs.

2. whose inability to provide for his children beyond the basic....... has earnt him their wrath and utter contempt

3. whose nagging wife.....with her constant threats to make him homeless makes him feel like nothing

4. whose lack of skills, initiative and will power....has apparently closed every opportunity to him

 

i don't know but this, for me, is the image of the somali man. i know things are changing but this will always be my understanding of the 'somali man. this is what i ran away from. of course, there are all sorts of factors at play......but its futile to solely lay the blame on the somali man. there are wider underpinnings and we ought to make considerations for these.

Sheesh Buddy!

Your apologist stand is sad. I'm sorry you had to describe the short-falls in such numbered details but you could only muster a vague "there are other factors" as a disclaimer.

[Wadani]

underdog;950315 wrote:

Therein lies the problem Reeyo. Gender roles have been blurred. Just because women CAN lead doesn't mean they SHOULD lead. I understand the reverse may be true and each case should be viewed on its own merits.

 

If Women who can do everything men can do seem to have lost their femininity and they have a mistaken theory as to why men are not attracted to them. The most common delusion is "he can't handle a strong independent woman".

 

It may come as no surprise that men like doe-eyed women who need us to open jars and slay dragons.

U sheeg dee. lol.

[Blessed]

You guys should read "Hablaha Geeska Afrika" by Hadrawi. It's a shame that he didn't do the same for men because it seems like you guys are struggling to define yourselves without relying on a reduction of female abilities.

[Reeyo]

Underdog I agree with you mostly- but let me add the root of the problem as Alpha mentioned above, with the crisis of man came a avoid- Women and families founds themselves dependent on this masculine figure you've described and their femininity (in the way you described it) which seemed to completely need masculinity for balance became useless in many regards. It became a weakness and with it came change.

 

Rule blurring is not a negative, but rather a method of survival and growth. Women managed to adapt we're just waiting for man to come to realization.

 

He needs to acknowledge and remember times and societies change. That understanding of femininity only exists in disney and to be honest with you it is rather eurocentric.

 

women define themselves through their family and children, and preserving culture and traditions. That has not changed much.

[underdog]

Blessed & Reeyo,

 

I agree there exists a portion of the male gender that have failed. But I see this as a natural thing. Some will fail and they should. Its a tall task to live up to the standards of true manhood and some will not make it. So I feel we've been generalizing "men" and "women"

 

And as far as this topic goes I think there isn't a single right answer and its all a matter of opinion.

 

I think men should be like this ........ and women should be like this..........

 

If we want to make this about things men do wrong and things women do wrong, its going to carry on for a while.

Some will agree, some will not.

[Reeyo]

Underdog; You have just earned the stamp of 'wise odey' join Jonny B.

[Cambuulo iyo bun]

You should have directed your nephew to speak with his male family members as a woman you cannot answer that question.

[Haatu]

A real man knows when to say no and walk away.

[Coofle]

This reminds of an article I read many years ago about a Somali father and his young daughter, for some reason it stuck in my head ((actually I had to search it on google for a while, grying to get the correct keyword))...give me the pleasure of sharing

My little daughter likes reading and surfing the net, and usually like this time, she is either on-line or doing her home work. But today I found her watching the television attentively. I looked at the TV to make sure that she was watching the right stuff (parental guide ... you know). I found nothing out of the ordinary and I let her continue watching. After the episode came to an end, I asked her about it. She explained this and that and concluded that the young actors were her role models. I nodded to hint my approval. Then, all of a sudden, she threw a million dollar question to me and said; “

daddy, who were your role models while you were growing up?

”

I paused for a moment to collect myself and immediately managed to put some sentences together

.

Read here

[Chimera]

What does it mean to be a man?

It means to be a loyal son, a loving grandson, a caring brother, a cherished cousin, a vital pillar of the family. It means striving to be a good husband and an even greater father.

[Mario B]

Chimera;951060 wrote:

It means to be a loyal son, a loving grandson, a caring brother, a cherished cousin, a vital pillar of the family. It means striving to be a good husband and an even greater father.

+1