The Arrival of the Magical Khatumo Kids

[Abtigiis]

If anyone was to elevate the parameters of Somalia’s notoriously reducible identity politics to a whole new amusing levels, it was only going to be the mirthful Khatumoites. Who else!

 

“Ask NOT what Khatumo can do for you, ask what YOU can do for Khatumo” reads the tag line of http://khaatumastate.com/.

 

It is a rendition of Kennedy’s patriotic punch line, only altering the subject of the statement and making it a rallying war chant for an “aggrieved” clan waiting for the second coming of the era of horses and zealot Sheikhs.

 

The arrival of the horsemen prefigures the return of lost grandeur and chivalry.

 

Recalcitrant northern infidel clans will get repaid in full for the horrors they inflicted on the sleeping nobility – the progeny of the Daraawish. Victory is certain, for the enemies could not fathom the might and marvel they are soon to face: the inimitable kids of Khatuumo. For evidence, all you need to do is click on the “khatumo kids” entry in the website.

 

The cartoon that plays is foreboding. These kids are unlike any in the Somali peninsula. They don’t drink milk when they are born. They get boiled ribs from selected goats as their first meal at birth. They eat the enlivining special “KH-Meal” which is also in the same website.

 

You do not have to be smart to imagine what these special breed of kids could do. At the age of 2, they can mount a speeding horse with ease, and throw poisoned arrows up to 70 meters.

 

“I am being led in Taleex without honour,

As though I am a slave from Zenj…”

 

Khatumoites may as well have already adapted these lines from the poem of the Arab historian Abu Makhuaf who decried his mistreatment in Damascus.

 

But surely such humilation is going to be history soon.

 

And the Khatumoites do no need a magical qilin - that legendary, single-horned animal with the body of a deer and and the tail of an ox, which medieval China fabled as an omen of the arrival of imperial virtue, wisdom and renaissance.

 

My Daraawish cousins have the the magical, mysterious, horse-riding, bone-munching kids who will soon be unleashed!

 

Secessionists beware!

[oba hiloowlow]

I support the Khaatumo cause i shall talk to the president Al xaaji Qoslaaye and tell him to send 3 airplanes loaded with weaponts to the Mad mullah International Airport. Khaatumo Ha guuleysato SNM ha dhacdo. wabilahi towfiiq.

[Abtigiis]

This was really hilarious. On a week, we finally got a countervailing SAHAL to the HAG, we also learn of the fact that Khaatumo kids are unlike any and that there is special dishes that Khatumoites eat that we never heard of. Aaliyah and Abdikhadar should have told us this long time ago.

[oba hiloowlow]

LOL ninyahow clan warfare wuu dhamaaday Clan bashing online is the new thing aniguna urur baan sameysanayaa oo la yiraho ''Unuka leh''

[Odey]

oba hiloowlow;897072 wrote:

LOL ninyahow clan warfare wuu dhamaaday Clan bashing online is the new thing aniguna urur baan sameysanayaa oo la yiraho ''Unuka leh''

ha ha ha ha ha .........I'll start thinking of my own urur ha ha ha ha

[Alpha Blondy]

do you have to be an ethnic khatumoite to be considered a khaatumo national? i'm thinking of jumping ships from somaliland to khaatumo.

[Xaaji Xunjuf]

For the first time in a 100 years, a plane has hovered over the blue sky of Taleh City

As if planes were landing on taleex before the early 1900s

[STOIC]

AT&T was just frisky and playful with our brothers in Khatumo...haha

[Abtigiis]

Xaaji, i also found that humorous but forgot to mention. Delusion and false clan grandeur has no limits in this somali earth.

 

Alpha, don't worry. You will be taken a prisoner soon and converted to a Khatumoite. Iska yar sug!

[Haatu]

Is this a sequel to the Khatumo Bra Shop sxb?

[Naxar Nugaaleed]

Unless am wrong, the first place the Brits used planes to bomb in Africa was taleex unless am wrong. One would think you of all people would get that reference Xaji.

[Xaaji Xunjuf]

That was not a friendly plane this is a friendly plane

[Malika]

^Dee, xiita being bombed by the British ayaa lagu quuriin, weeyaan shekadu..lool

[Xaaji Xunjuf]

lool@ Malika waba yaab Naxar hadu leeyahay war wa la ii bombgerey intaasuun ii ogalada:D

[Taleexi]

Well illustrated observation iga dheh. If I may add, the political paradigm has shifted, being skillful horse rider glory days are long gone and dead however, it is inevitable that SL rewrites soon its constitution and redraws its map for our collective good. Khatumo factor can no longer ignored in the political discourse of the north.