A Toilet Scheme!

[NGONGE]

Addis, May 2012

 

In a break in the meeting of the Somali Roadmap signatories, The Galmudug 'president' goes to answer the call of nature. As he's relieving himself and muttering the words "wale inaanan ogalaan, Sharif iyo xirtiisa ima dhici karaan", he hears a sound coming from the cubical behind him.

 

He looks around only to see a half closed door with a four fingered hand beckoning him over with the sound "psstt, psstt".

 

“acoodo bi allah min qooma loot” says the president loudly.

 

“war waa aniga” comes back the reply.

 

“Yaa? Maxaad tedhi? Adiga a? Ma xita Somalida xanuunka la baray? Najina!”

 

“War waa cabdiraxman, bal yara kaalay” shouts the person behind the door

 

“Noocaga magacyada illahy in lago daro may aheen” replies a disgusted Caalin

 

“War waa Farole, axmaqyaho. Waxan doonaya in aan kaala tashado arrinta shirkaan aan ku jirno” says the Imam.

 

“Ma Faroole ba? Aax! Hada in ay xabadi maqantahay waan arkayay” says an excited Caalin

 

“Haa. Bal kaalay intaanay cidi na arkin” whispers an agitated Imam

 

“Haye. Maxa so kurdhay?” asks a curious Caalin.

 

“Qoladi TFGda siday inoo galeen ma argtay?” asks a conspiratorial Imam.

 

“Haa! Sharif iyo Cabdi wali ayaa buskotkii wada boobay” answers a livid Caalin

 

“War buskotka iska ilow, aniga mid ka fiican kuu keeni markaad Garowe igu timaadid” says a frustrated Imam

 

“Horomar” laughs a suspicious Caalin.

 

“Waxaan ku idhi, ma argtay ragii siday o fadheesteen? Kurasida ogo fiican bay wada fadheesteen! Anaga na koonahay na fadheesiyeen!” says a hurt Imam

 

“Waa runtaa! Agtaaday I fadheesiyaan!” says a disappointed Caalin.

 

“War ragga waa inaan iska cilino” says a determined Imam

 

“Haye, maxano samiina?” asks a puzzled Caalin

 

“Istanbul markaan tagno wa inaano kuraasida ogo fiican lana fadheesyo” Argues the Imam.

 

“Waa runta. Agtada hadii ay mar kale la I fadheesyo wabaan cadhoonaya” Says Caalin.

 

“Haa! Madaxdo waa in ay is ag fadheestaan. Sheikh Sharif labadiisa dhinac wa inay na fadheesiyaan” states a resolute Imam.

 

“Sax! Cabdi wali iyo kii qoslaayay wa inay xaga kale fadheestan” adds an animated Caalin.

 

“Marka maxaano yeelna?” asks a probing Imam.

 

“Mahiga aan ka codsano ino kuraasida inoo badalo” Suggests a pondering Caalin.

 

“Mahiga naga daa, waxba inoo ma kurdhinyo, ninyaho” says a resigned Imam.

 

“Hada maxan sameena?” asks a perplexed Caalin

 

“Shrika Turkiga waan diidaynaa inaan ka qayb galno” says a scheming Imam

 

“War ha odhan! Turkida lacag badan ayaay igu balan qadeen. Anigo ma diidi karo” says a beseeching Caalin.

 

“Axmaq baad tahay aan siyaasada wax ka aqoon, Caalino. Been been bano ku diidayna” says an emphatic Imam.

 

“Been been?” asks a perplexed Caalin.

 

“Haa. Siyaasad iyo wax aan jirin ayaan ka cabanayna. Kolay Turkido way nala yaabayeen markaasay na odhan, “maxa dhacay? Oo maxad nago diideen?” waba markay kubbada inoo salaxayaan oo arrinta kurasida o sheegi doono. Miyay kula tahay in ay na diidi karan?” asks a triumphant Imam

 

“Maya. Maya. Xareef baad tahay Faroolo” Answers an impressed Caalin.

 

“Hadaba aniga baritoole warqaad aad ila saxixdid ku keeni doona” says a resolute Imam

 

“Warqaad maxay? Anigo waxba ma saxiixyo” answers a worried Caalin.

 

“War waa warqaad aan ku diidno shirka Istanbul. Labada yada saxiixaya oo websityadaan o dirayna. Wax fahan” says an increasingly agitated Imam.

 

“Ma tii kuraasida?” asks Caalin.

 

“Haa, waa tii kuraasida” answers a despondent Imam.

 

“Sax. Qor warqada, Faroolo, Qor” says a joyous Caalin

 

“Hadaba barito ha inoo ahaato. Iminka na iga bax aan kaa kaajay” says a dismissive Imam.

 

“Waayahay. Eeen..een..buskutka Garowe guurmaad ii keeni?”

 

 

 

(pardon any mistaks in the Somali. It was a twenty minute job).

[SayidSomal]

اللُّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنَ الْخُبْثِ وَالْخَبَائِثِ

[NGONGE]

Sayid*Somal;835537 wrote:

اللُّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنَ الْخُبْثِ وَالْخَبَائِثِ

Waa into Caalin yedhi marko toiletka galayay. Ma waxaad leedahay way o socon wayday, Sayido?

[Malika]

^Warya Ngonge - maxaa kaa taqaniid reer Galmudug? Maa biskotii baa wax uu yahay baad iistiri? yaah!

 

Sorry, didn't get the gist of your sarcasm in your post - marka waan iska tageya..lol

[Somalia]

That was a funny read.

[SayidSomal]

NGONGE;835539 wrote:

Waa into Caalin yedhi marko toiletka galayay. Ma waxaad leedahay way o socon wayday, Sayidow?

Nah, I read it for myself before I entered this toilet thread

[oba hiloowlow]

:D looool@ buskutkii ayaa nalaka boobay hahah

[SayidSomal]

where is part two? - involving turkish delights and majestic seats?

[SayidSomal]

I demand one be done for Siilaanyo and the London seats

[NGONGE]

^^ The thought did cross my mind this morning. But it wasn't about the seats.

 

It was more along the lines of "conspiracy".

[SayidSomal]

war forget about the conspiracy and arrange the seats

[NGONGE]

^^ Dee qola walba have to be dealt with according to their main "problem". Faroole was fighting to be seen and that's why the seat issue applies to him. Somaliland's one is about the paranoia of being stitched up. Marka a lampoon should bear that in mind and make it look as if they've sent a "spy" to this conference to ensure that the Somalis are not talking about them in their absence. Wax fahan.

[SayidSomal]

LOOOL - Send the spy then (but he must not be seen)

[NGONGE]

^^ It's Jacaylbaro's "observer" idea in that other thread.