Of cheating men and their mobile phones

[Carafaat]

strange topic. strange reactions of these 40+ aged people. Ngonge is an Arab. Arabs dont even have a word for cheating, they have a word for burning in hell or some.

[Juxa]

I dont agree with checking your wife/husband's phone. I was brought up with the notion of digsi d*a*d*a*n* waligaa ha fiiran unless you have the permission of the cook

 

to me going through pockets, bank statements, telephone bills waa tuuganimo, i consider it theft, violation of basic privacy walahi. it would never cross my mind to look, i simply refuse to live that way.

 

dadoow qofkii raba inuu tago lama celin karo, what somali people men or women refuse to acknowledge is that relationships need to be worked on constantly. your interest in your husband/wife should not stop the moment you say i do. taking one another for granted na waa disaster waiting to happen.

 

Blessed i dont think young divorced women should live life of loneliness but sometimes women jump into ill considered marriage and the children suffer.

[Malika]

^You my dear is a wise one..masha'allah.

 

I soo, agree that the nurturing of the relationship should not end just because one is married to the other - it should be continued through out.

[AYOUB]

Abtigiis;835443 wrote:

MMA,

 

You can delete a call on the iphone. Go to recent calls, then Edit, then you get see the recent calls with a red (like stop) sign on the left side, touch it, and then the horizontal white line in the stop sign becomes vertical, then you will see a delete option on the right corner. U sheeg saaxiibkaa. He can delete one or two calls without erasing all recent calls.

Which iPhone do you have saaxib? Mine too gives "clear" but no "edit" option.

[Abtigiis]

Juxa;835474 wrote:

I dont agree with checking your wife/husband's phone. I was brought up with the notion of digsi d*a*d*a*n* waligaa ha fiiran unless you have the permission of the cook

 

to me going through pockets, bank statements, telephone bills waa tuuganimo, i consider it theft, violation of basic privacy walahi. it would never cross my mind to look, i simply refuse to live that way.

This is fairytale! And you know i Juxa. The thing is you do not have to search your partners gadgets and pockets. Such things do not start like that. You only do that or hesitate to do it, if you are sufficiently in doubt things are not in order. So, it is easy to say such catagorical 'i will not check anything' when you are not in a state of confusion or suspicion.

 

That said, It is highly unlikely that your partner (wife or husband) will not come across something that is private for you while you are living togather. If that is the case, it is an odd marriage. Your wife or husband can discover or see (accidentally or trying to help) messages on your phone, receive calls for you while you are in shower or sleeping and you were expecting a 'normal' caller. Or you leave your computer for a while and the wife sees your incoming emails or facebook account. Actually, if she is not suspecting anything bad, she may actually decide to just have a look at your friends on facebook or etc. It is very NORMAL. There is a difference between privacy and hiding things. If I notice my wife is apprehensive about her phones, cuts incoming calls, or runs to the kitchen to answer some phones or strange things, I SURE will get suspicious and if I am suspicious I will not lie to you, I will try to know what is going on. I will do so, because I have to make a decision and I canot allow to make such a decision on the basis of a hunch or guess. I will try to know if my suspicions are right or reasonable and if I find out they are, it is the END OF the story. In this age of AIDS and HIV, there is no second chance!

 

Markaa Juxaa hadaad shakidid maxaad sameeyn? you say I am thought not to be 'theif' and put your life in danger for the sake of respecting a social moral code 'of not intruding into the privacy of others"?

 

Ayoubd,

 

Iphone 4. clear markuu kuu soo baxo you get the list of all calls (with red stop-like mark) and then on the top side you will see EDIT. All you have to do is touch the number you want (meesha cas ee STOP sign u eg taabo) and then the DELETE option comes up automatically.

 

Why am I teaching cheaters how to delte calls? :D

 

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for any deletion of numbers of cheating that takes place as the result of this advice.

[AYOUB]

^ Maybe I need to do software update coz no edit option comes up. Mise adaa chinese iPhone isticmaala?

 

P.S I just want to know how to delete numbers that are chargeable if I call by accident. Dhawr jeer bay igu dhacday.

[Juxa]

Abtigiis, I REFUSE TO LIVE THAT WAY!

 

it is not social or moral codes, i dont go thorough other people's things. it is one thing to catch glimps of something such as an open page on FB etc but it is totally different thing to investigate.

 

and why on earth would you answer someone else's phone unless lagu dhaho hebelooow ii qabo.............

 

i am not trying to turn blind eye or suggest you to do it but it all depends,maybe certain people you expect them to stray from fakfaktooda badan.

 

being married does not give you a reason to be morally corrupt individual. i wont want to live a life of shame and regret

 

ps: if your partner was cheating, you would know and women always know

[Abtigiis]

^ I didn't know women always know! Seriously, I think they would know. Qofku markuu corruption ku jiro xagga reerka, signs yar yar oo la arko ayaa jira. He or she will lie about small things that really shouldn't have mattered: like where are you now? eh..meel.. eh magaranaysid.. qaar yidhaa baan arkay.

 

Ayoub, funny you say that, I was about to say ma chinese baa kaagu walaahi. War nin dhan oo Somalilander ah baa Dubai maalinkuu soo baxay iiga keenay. Kaagan u maleyn inuu yahay iphone (made in Somaliland ah). Wuu jiraa ee la soco.

[Juxa]

I think inlaguu soo direy inaad buufis nagu ridid ninyow

 

if you ever visit london, i will schedule you with a free appointment with a marriage counsellor/psychologist, your views on marriage and relationships are somewhat disturbing full of distrust.

 

shaki iyo wiswis baad dadka ku beertaa, marka waa inlaga salgaaro waxa kaa dhigey belo-sheeg/hoog/sheeg!

 

let me earn my keep now, it is such a nice sunny day, qoraxdoo ifeysa and pay day:)

[Malika]

"shaki iyo wiswis baad dadka ku beertaa, marka waa inlaga salgaaro waxa kaa dhigey belo-sheeg/hoog/sheeg!"..Lool, he got you thinking huh?..Loooooool

 

Sometimes in marriage ignorance is bliss - swahiligu wexee yiradaan 'hadaa chicken [free range ones] uu sii firsatiid, chicken weiliga madaan cuunii leheyn [pheww! thats long winded translation] - in other words, if one obeserves a chicken feeding, they will not eat chicken - waad aragteen what the little creatures eat, all sorts.

[Blessed]

^LOL.. what does that mean? Talking about buufis rag, Juxa. I've spent Sabtidii with 40 islaamo, only a handful had good jacayl stories to tell.. wallee they killed my romantic spirit...have a lovely day, stuck in doors with a pile of books.

 

Abtigiis,

Afka nool baad tahay, miyaa? One of my friends is one those people 'darling, sweetie' qof walba tidhaahda, hadalkeedaa saas ah.... maalin dhawayd she gets a text message froma colleagues GF saying 'for your information, so and so has a GF and a child, kindly stop sending him leading texts' . She was furious and spent awhole day text fighting with the woman. LOL.

[Juxa]

No Malika he did not get me thinking ee my ayeeyo nature is worried for the wellbeing of wiilasheena:)

 

Blessed looooooooool waa istaahishaa inla dhaho saas

[NGONGE]

AYOUB;835094 wrote:

Waa runtaa. No justification for cheating, but stop being Farah and give credit where due. Being caught must be out-weighed by "too much to lose".

Nope. Being caught is a bigger worry for me. It's a personal thing, man. I never liked mother catching me taking a drink out of the fridge without asking. I never liked the idea of cheating in school in case I got caught, and I never would like being caught with my shorts downs (in both the literal and figurative sense). It's not about wives, parents or friends, saaxib. It's about self worth and knowing that The NGONGE is never this vulgar. Control, adeer, control.

[Abtigiis]

Malika and Juxa,

 

I am trusting. In fact, a lot. Not only on marriage issues, but in social life. The biggest worry of my mom is I will be betrayed by a person i trusted and will end up in bad situation!! Qof aana aamini karin one night naag iima ahaateen. Laakin when it comes to men, I advise you to be alert,just a little bit. We, men, are too complex and dynamic in our love quest!

 

Maybe I am a bit more suspicious than the average faarax because I grew up in a culture where they say "Maa manum lay kafaa, indhiyaaw tinish tertir" (which translates to: While it is not bad to trust, it is wise to have slight suspicions"). kkkkkkkkkkkk

 

By the way, I do not believe trust/suspicion is something that comes by default. It is the other person who creates them for you. Naag adigoo shaah la cabaya talafoon lagu la soo hadlay oo tidhaa "saloonkii baa timaha la iigu hagaajinayaa ee markaan dhamsyto ayaan kula soo hadli", and then looks at you and says "hooyo ayey ahayd", yaa aamin kara? Not me.

 

Blessed,

 

No, I am absolutely old school. I do not even call and say sideed tihiin to the wives of my friends, let alone joke around. honey, iyo hi hebla iyo waxaas I find them not only disgusting but a sign of moral depravity. Nin oday ah iyo naag marwo ah wax la yidhaa dadka aaminsan baan ahay. For me, grilfriends are for fun, not wives. :D by the way, the old women are right. As A man of many years old, I can count the number of men loyal to their wives in my fingers. Walaahi, most men are not! That I know. I believe I am, relatively - I repeat relatively, one of the loyal ones. kkkkk

[AYOUB]

NG, But you did raid the fridge because the risk was worth it.