Head Scarf Forgotten On Stairway Railings.

[Nur]

Nomads

 

Today, Xalimo Yarey, is a College student ( story dates back a dacade ago), progressing very well, very bright, intelligent and pious, Alhamdulillah. Her experience is similar to that of many Geeljirtos on this site, but, parental struggle pays off, like in Xalimos case, at times i feel that the Somalis from abroad to be a stronger breed than their homegrown counterparts, at least those who stuck to their values.

 

 

Nur

[RendezVous]

Bro Nur,

 

Thank you for all your informative topics.You really make the forum look decent.

 

Those who read this topic of yours must have read the following other topics

 

Number One

 

Second

 

and may be lastly also this,

 

Third section

[Modesty]

I don't even think it's necessary to force a 11 year girl to wear a hijab. For one, she is still young, secondly, she should first learn the basics of tawheed. That's why we see many girls wearing the hijab because "it's a somali thing" or they want to be seen as good girls, yet at the same time they don't have an Islamic akhlaq. It's sad. Alhamdulilah, my parents never forced hijab down my throat, I dressed the way I wanted to dress, and finally as I learned more about the religion hijab came naturally.

[Batta]

Salaam calykum,

Bro Nur this an excellent topic to tackle ,i myself was told to wear the headscarf when i was living in one of the arab countries n i was 13 yrs old, but Alxamdulilah i never removed it.

However i had many school freinds who used to remove it as soon as they come into school.

Anyways ,teh parents have to do more than forcing their children to wear the scarf, they have to first tell them why its good to wear it? wt does it mean to be muslim gal? and of course the scarf part will come naturally

And the most important thing is to teach the children about the morals, unfortunetly most of the mothers are worried about their gals covering then they r about teh morals.

Of course the mothers have to be good rule models for their children in the department of morals!!!!

I had an encounter with a lady who ran away with her children from north America to a country i was in in Africa, the gals were taken to islamic schools, they were told to wear a certain way n all.

Unfortunetly i witnessed how the mother was talking to one of her workers at their home, n that gives a wrong message to her children and the worst part is that SHE DOES NOT REALIZE THAT SHE HAS NO RIGHT TO ABUSE THAT PERSON JUST COS SHE PAYS him/her.

 

So to all of u ppl when u pray ask Allah to give u high morals too.

 

Allahuma ini as'aluka al cifa wa xusn al quluqwal ridaa bil qadar.

Ameen.

[Nur]

Rendezvous

 

Thanks for the refernce lists ( Amazon Type), all relevant materials, Jazaakellahu Kheiran.

 

Modesty sis

 

Agree 100% baarakallahu feek, however there are cases in which the kid voluntarily wants to wear the Hijab, but may not be strong enough to defend it when criticized at school, as a result kid can not let mommy down by taking off again, so she takes it off as school.

 

Batta

 

Good points sis, the inside before the outside, Islam resides inside, but manifests outside. We should never force preteen kids to wear Hijaab, at the same time we should spend more time with them to give them morals to live with, foremost of which is respect of others, their beliefs, tolerance, honesty, helpfulness to others and all other Islamic ideals.

 

 

Nur

[Umm_Uthman]

mashallah nice topic....i was born in london and i started to wear a headscarf wen i was four....cuz dats wen i started nursery.....my mum just made it sound nice and i didnt take it off until i was 7 wen the other girls in my class deared me to for a day (i was the onli one in da whole school to wear it)....but felt reali guilty wen my teacher asked me why i took it off which made me put it right back on.....but wen a parents evening came she asked my mum ifshe allowed me to take it off in class....i thought my mum was gona beat me but allahumduillah she just spoke to me....and i never took it off again....and at 14 i choose to stop wearing uniform and wear a half jilbab to school (this is before all this taking people to court stuff) and started my nikkab at 16..... the age that u teach a child to pray is 7 and u beat dem at 10..... the problem with most parents is that they dont tell their children what a hijab is for it more like u have to wear it ad if u dont u reap the consequences. its like most parents send their kids to school, duqsi and so forth and dont knoe wat they learn.....they think cuz its an islamic school there is gona b an islamic enviroment which is usually not the case, in school in the west anyways.....obviously for a parent to reinforce stuff they need to show a mixture of love and caringness and dat but also the kids need to fear da parent to some degree not that the parent needs to get fiilo lol.....i mean one way my mum brought us up was by having family discussion, games inoder to learn somali, plus islamic stuff.......but the funny thing is wen u see little girls who have bigger hijab den their mums.....the mum dont want thei kids to turn out like them but they arent clocking on to the fact that children are watching......its like my cousin daughther asked her ant who picks her up from school not to wear her jilaba and she should just wear a coat and small head scarf cuz all the other mums do.....

[Nur]

Good and Real life feedback, Jazakellahu kheiran Umm Cuthmaan, your case shows the deep morality kids are born with, as a kid I also knew when I was upto sum sin wong, ( something Wrong in Chinese), the inner imbedded Fitra tells a child what is right and what is wrong, its adults who either reinforce that Fitra or corrupt the child by telling em that they dont have to wear it or so on.

 

To introduce Islamic concepts ( Aqeedah), and ethics ( Akhlaaq) as games is indeed a very briliant idea, as kids, we learn playing monopoly ( Capitalist Greedy Game), and we grow up with greed, its about time Muslims created more children entertainment programs that aid their prinicples instead of destructive principles that shake their beliefs to the roots.

 

I aso agree with you that lil spanking goes a long way in keeping a kid on track.

 

Nur