samjamaa Posted February 3, 2012 Somali wedding party is one thing i never understood, normally when 2 person want to marry, why they have to make biggest party in five stars hotel( 1000 KD= 3500$) and bride has to wear expensive wedding dress( rented in 400KD= 1383.56 $) for only one night. I have Cousin had that type of parties and after few months my cousin and her husband had broke as hell from debts they have to payback. Why?!!! Personally I'd rather have lifelong savings then paying for all that and I wouldn't want my husband to pay all that money to be honest, I just think it's unnecessary because we have to start marriage life in blessed and good way and according to Islam the less expensive wedding is more blessed and successful. That's my opinion anyway, I'm sure other people have interesting views. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nin-Yaaban Posted February 3, 2012 I agree with you, its just a waste of money. I had a friend who spent $6k on his wedding, and this was the biggest wedding i've been to at the time. After spending all that money, things didn't work out between the two, and they end up divorcing few months later. What a waste. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Juxa Posted February 3, 2012 This is moot discussion, those marrying make the decision and should have weddings based on their income and affordability Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BOB Posted February 3, 2012 Juxa, Ask Samjamaa what kind of wedding would she like to have? How much the budget of her wedding would be? Does she want to have a white wedding? Does she want to have a traditional Somali wedding? How much mehr is she going to ask for? How long is the guest list going to be? How many bridesmaids does she want to have? What kind of furniture does she want? How many bedrooms is her house going to have? How many servants does she want? And finally where does she want to go for her honeymoon? Thanks. Peace, Love & Unity. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Juxa Posted February 3, 2012 ^^ lol freaks you out yaah! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BOB Posted February 3, 2012 It's not the guur that freaks me out but rather all these monkey business expenses which would make my bank account depressed and contemplate on committing suicide. Peace, Love & Unity. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Juxa Posted February 3, 2012 I really dont understand this, obviously if you cant afford big wedding, you just tell her No. Tell the woman to chip in if she wants i arkaay i maqlaay wedding. hadii kale a man should not promise cirka iyo dhulka. Somalidu waxay tiraahdaa wax aan gacantaada ku jirin afkaada waa ka raagaan( live within your own limits) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OdaySomali Posted February 3, 2012 At one time I wouldn't have had a problem with someone spending a lot of money on a wedding celebration but I have come to my senses now. How many needy orphans and families would £10,000 feed and for how long ? Assuming a standard amount of $50, you could feed 10 families or 10 groups of orphans for two and a half years and still have change left over. Imagine the ajar you would earn in return subxannallah - now that would be an investment! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OdaySomali Posted February 3, 2012 This is such a strong image and the message is so profound. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
raula Posted February 3, 2012 (bride or the groom) should have firm ground on how they envision their marriage/life, so even if the brother/sister has the capacity to afford a grande wedding, should they spend it? (perhaps not)-maybe put it towards something long term etc. I have heard of.."walaahi i don't care about wedding..i don't even want it..BUT..my aunts..qaraabo/.....hebel hebel...would throw it anyway....are forcing me...." that's just bull.....Stick w/your decisions...because once you start w/wedding prep's (unless its the meher only..& its entailings)...nothing will be to perfection..so you'll add till you overspend...even its only women..buranbur....etc. ***I have always said.."just because your spouse is famous/has status i.e. doctor/MP/president/etc, doesn't mean you are also..." create your own path and be independent while you share the compassion & companionship of marriage. Salam. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blessed Posted February 3, 2012 It's one thing if you're considering the halaal and haraam of it and off course, you certainly would get more ajer if you give to orphans. However, you guys are forgetting that marriage is a celebration, yaa naas. I'm totally on board with anti-extravagance brigade but I reckon if people can afford it, for some 10k isn't a big deal and want it, let them enjoy it. Marriage is (one of) the biggest milestones of your life, after all. However, it's ridiculous when poor who are often homeless insist on an expensive Hilton wedding which they must pay for with added interest for the next 5 years... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Juxa Posted February 3, 2012 As long as you are not asking for qaaraan do as you please! Blessed said marriage is a celebration so celebrate sidaad doonto. Be it simple and nice or waali, deyn iyo rafaad or something you as a couple can afford Don't let anyone dictate your day Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BOB Posted February 3, 2012 Juxa;784503 wrote: I really dont understand this, obviously if you cant afford big wedding, you just tell her No. Tell the woman to chip in if she wants i arkaay i maqlaay wedding. hadii kale a man should not promise cirka iyo dhulka. Somalidu waxay tiraahdaa wax aan gacantaada ku jirin afkaada waa ka raagaan( live within your own limits) First and foremost I'm totally against the wedding parties where ragga iyo bilcaamaha ee is dhax boodaayaan, I don't care if it costs 5 Shillings or £5000 no such wedding for me whatsoever simply because waa xaraam and ma rabo in meel aan kheyr iyo wanaag ka raadinaayo ee xaraam is fusqi uu ka dhaco oo aan aniga hadhoow mas'uul ka noqonaayo ileeyn anigaa dadkaan isugu yeeray musicna u shidaye. Personally speaking I wouldn't ask for the madam to chip in on anything and if she wants the circus wedding then she should find another clown to participate in as I won't have anything to do with it SIMPLE AS THAT but I'd rather spend fortune on the honeymoon than the wedding and take her to an exotic place where no xallimo and faarax has ever been to and trust me I know so many places that will literally take your breath away the moment you lay your eyes on and last but not least I don't promise nothing to no one never mind cirka iyo dhulka. Peace, Love & Unity. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
samjamaa Posted February 4, 2012 Juxa you are right 'it's their wedding let them do what they like, it's individual choice, keep out of it' but If we all just 'minded our own business' when people are doing things against the Islam then we would become very selfish individuals and conform to the Western 'Individualistic' ideals. This is not Islamic because you should love for your brother what you love for yourself and I wish all Muslim marriages success and full of blessings from Allah SWT. BOB I have no problem with the cultural traditions party for the bride and her (female) relatives, a time where women get dressed up, enjoy each other's company, eat and just have a good time together, so long as nothing haraam goes on at the event. Just think of all the debt that people end up with after a wedding, yeah you enjoy it all for a couple of hours but then spend years trying to pay up for those couple of hours of 'fun' Imagine what could have been done with all that money? You could spend that money on travelling with your husband after the wedding or even use it for your new life together. For me the best place to spend my honeymoon is Mecca for Umrah,I guess not many people think that far ahead. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miriam1 Posted February 4, 2012 Agreed! What's the point of spending $25,000+ on one stressful day and then hop on a car and go to Niagara Falls the next day or worse off..to your apartment. Dear God. A long and and amazing honey money would create more memories than the your wedding party honestly. BOB;784730 wrote: Personally speaking I wouldn't ask for the madam to chip in on anything and if she wants the circus wedding then she should find another clown to participate in as I won't have anything to do with it SIMPLE AS THAT but I'd rather spend fortune on the honeymoon than the wedding and take her to an exotic place where no xallimo and faarax has ever been to and trust me I know so many places that will literally take your breath away the moment you lay your eyes on and last but not least I don't promise nothing to no one never mind cirka iyo dhulka. Peace, Love & Unity. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
