Aaliyyah Posted May 19, 2011 lol you seem to know what causes it! heedhe meel u furo oo bal dadka wacyi gali .. its really creepy hw high the divorce rate is, one day we were at this wedding and a shiekhad lady was preaching the girl it was like muxadaro wedding n shes like naa cuntada sifiican u kari ninkaga dhageeso wa lugu jano tagaaye lol and stuff like that ..naag wayeel ah intay shekadii so dhex gashay tidhi oo ma xita haduu nin xun yahay ma la dhagesanaya ..and she was grumbling (miskiin I was told a man divorced her and left her to raise 9 kids she looked like in her early 70s or so)..Anyways, that same girl who got married that day was divorced less than a month after. The point is the divorce rate is pretty high in the somali community and it is a sad case...yet im not painting all somalis with the same brush, mashallah many are happily married but dadkan is furaya like its some sort of a joke waa in wax laga qabta hadii wax laga qaban karo.. salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
genius pauper. Posted May 20, 2011 who is to blame? The men or the women? hadeynu somali nahay, waxaa naga maqan kaalinta eey waalidka kulahayeen guurka. Imagine, in an ideal somali family, it hardly happens, in walidiinta eey owladooda kala hadlaan arimaha kusaabsan guurka, astaamaha guurka xun, sababaha keeno, sida loo xusho ninka fiican, gabadha fiican and what have you. I think it is a taboo for a somali mother or father to coach his/her children about life and the realities of a prosperous marriage, or even tell their girl child about the facts of men. then the child grows up with no idea whatsoever about the other gender except what he/she hears for their pals and friends. Then the child does as the friends do. his family life is totally not connected to his marital life. Wexeey dhahaan somalidu ' ishaa falateen' happens. Iska xoogsa and explore, shekadoo dhan qas iyo lab ayeey isku rogi. Maxa lasameeyni kolka? halaiska nolaado marka, nin walboow naftaa, nabiyoow umadaa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Juxa Posted May 20, 2011 WHAT DID IBTI SAY?:mad::mad: Blessed aniga iyo ibti dhiigeena kala ilaali. balse usheeg, the busier you are with other things the happier marriage you shall have. aduunyo waxay xumaaneysaa markaad har iyo habeen iska soo horjeedaan! so one should be married, studying, painting bad-weynta india at the same time Che...fadhiga ka kac meesha hasoo indho buurnaane Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nuune Posted May 20, 2011 The point is the divorce rate is pretty high in the somali community and it is a sad case The marriage rate is pretty high too, a balance do exist there, say for example, if 4 families in your xaafad take the divorce route in a period of 10 days, then the next xaafad opposite you will be celebrating 4 marriages in 4 weekends, marka hala yaabin, adduunkaa saas iska ah, dhowr iyo labaatan kun oo qof baa dhimata every second, dhowr iyo labaatan kalena wey dhalataa, dharaaraha isku mid ma ahan, dhededa roobkuna waa udgoon, rooti baad ku quraacan, qof kalena bulukeeti ayuu daaqayaa oo asoo af qalaalan buu kaa soo hor bixi mar aad xarootey ood is xoreesey ayuu kuu soo xeed-xeedan. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
genius pauper. Posted May 20, 2011 ~~~~iyaa? guur iyo furniin maxaa isku rate kadhigay? iskuma dhowo, waxaa kabadan guurka waloow, the rate of divorce is hiking. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted May 20, 2011 Nuune you are right walaal noloshu wa iska saas. Laakin hadaan somali nahay waalidkeen facooda divorce rateku ma jiri jirin suu hada u jiro. Marka mesha waxa yaala uun maxa hada la isku fura...yacni in la fahmo mesha dhibatadu ka imanaso o la isku dayo in la wajaho.. Iska xoogsa and explore, shekadoo dhan qas iyo lab ayeey isku rogi. Maxa lasameeyni kolka? halaiska nolaado marka, nin walboow naftaa, nabiyoow umadaa Genius lol loving your somali. Mashallah...walaal you have a point with the comment abt there being communication between parents and their kids and sadly that communication gap is even wider now that theres both cultural/language gap btw parents n their kids..walidki asagii oo ilmihisi 100% isku taxalujineen in uu la hadlo maalintu damco oo is dhohoyo hmm hebla is old enough or hebel is old enoughna..hebel dhaqan iyo luqad kale uu wata maba fahmayo meshuu ka imanayo walidku. Marka dabcan waxa fiican in caruurtu iyo waalidku wada hadlaan mar walba guurka xita intey shekadu gaadhin..oo uu walidku ka war hayo caruurtiisa barina markay old enough noqdaan dabcan wax yaalahan kala hadlo si furfuran sababto ah if you dnt educate your kids about these type of issues (that somali community all the times hushes about)..the school, the tv, and the community will educate your kids and by the time the parent wakes up and tries to tell their children abt whats wrong and right well it will be too damn late..that person already has his own perspective that he developed over the years while the parent was clearly not involved. So definitely parents have to instil in their kids their values before someone else does their job for them.. salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted May 20, 2011 so one should be married, studying, painting bad-weynta india at the same time I am sure everyone would love to do that..doing everything at the same time. But, as I said that is not usually doable!!..but doable for some..I guess some of us are made of JELLY (QOUTING blessed here LOL).. Posted by Blessed: LOL. Ibts, is that your final answer. You're right it's impossible if you're made of jelly. Honestly, how many unmarrieds nolosha ka dhacay ayaa jira? This is just one of many convenient excuses, if you ask me.... salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SayidSomal Posted May 20, 2011 ^no - every one is made of calaq - is not like jelly - more like blood clot. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Juxa Posted May 20, 2011 Aaliyah you have to do what is right for you always, balse in general nothing worth having is ever easy! taa ma been baa? as to the issue of marriage and studying, it is definetly doable, i dont see it different than marriage and working. in fact many people i know are married, study and work and on top of that try to have a social life, time for family and friends. trust me they are made of same stuff adiga lagaa sameeyay, oo ma aha super-humans or dad waalan,,,,you just get on with it. but if that is not what a person wants, then by all means finish your study, get a job( find a guy, quit the job) and get married all in that order ps: Sayid is made of DHAGAX Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted May 20, 2011 Juxa thanks for the advice hun! I know you mean well! but I dont equate working to studying! BUT that is my opinion!...Laakin you are right people need to multitask ..baryahan dadku mayac bay so baxeen waad yaabi nolosha ayeeyday iyo lodkeedu ku nolaan jireen LOL.. ^no - every one is made of calaq - is not like jelly - more like blood clot. lol@ is not like jelly!!.. lol@ Sayid is made of dhagax I think so tooo Joking salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SayidSomal Posted May 20, 2011 lol@dhagax - dumaashi i am made of more studier stuff Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
genius pauper. Posted May 20, 2011 ~~~~~Aaliyyah, wad isku fuuqsatay, lol. i concur with you absolutely. cheers p.s. i am nominating aaliyyah to 3ilaju mushkilatul usrah post. the post was vacant for very looooooooooong time.:cool: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted May 20, 2011 ~~~~~Aaliyyah, wad isku fuuqsatay, lol. i concur with you absolutely. cheers p.s. i am nominating aaliyyah to 3ilaju mushkilatul usrah post. the post was vacant for very looooooooooong time. waad isku fuuqsaday maxa la dhaha loool..but u agreed with me so that must be a positive comment n lol@ 3ilaju mushkilatu usrah...I can try to give my opinions here and there but at the end of the day I cant really contribute muchhh since I havent started that chapter of life..lol..yacni i can say heedhe parents caruurtina la hadla or islaanyahay odayga maqal or odeyahow u naxariso xaskaga oo is dhageesta ..laakin shekadeedo wa habar fadhida lagdin la fudud!!..anuu waxan ku wareejiyay Blessed iyo Juxa responsibilitigii ....they seem two smart sisters who can contribute a lot to this thread salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
genius pauper. Posted May 20, 2011 ~~~~aaliyyahh, ;) its is a positive comment. lol you really contribute whole heartedly, which makes you an icon. lakiin hadaadan wili xil qaadin, wa yabee ya kusheegay all this 'locked' information from the people like you? hope inaad fahantay? hahahaha it is a worth course, to discuss the marital failures and come up with possible solutions, because by doing so, we might atleast prevent even one family from breaking. somalida reer yurub, fadlan xaliya mushkilada single mother. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted May 20, 2011 loool uma maleenayo in ay positive comment aheed..af carabi bay aheed ban isidhi! lol@ locked information...dee wayeelka iyo dumarka ayaan shaaha u kariya la shekeestaana! waxbadan baan saas ka korarsady ma istidhi it goes like this aaliyah: hebla maxa maanta dhacay hebla: dee kii baa dhibaato igu haya markaasan dhaha sug bal aan shaah inoo soo dhigee kadibna ii sheeg ...and the rest is history! dhibatoyinka badan markaad maqashid waxbaad ka kororsani ...at the same timena you lose hope in somali men lol at times!!!...Not puting fully the whole blame on men clearly women have their share actually qaar yagaaba ah balayo laga acuudubileesto lol..... laakin nin asaga familyga responsibilitgeeda haya if he is man enough his wife shouldnt be complaining to the neighbors...wa in uu danihisa yaqaana heheh salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites