wyre Posted January 19, 2011 CHARACTERS Mama………………………… 50years old; a civil Dervant Papa ………………………… 60years old; a Business man John…………………………… Their son; senior to **** Sade…………………………... Their daughter; About 22 to 23years old Auntie………………………… Sade’s Aunt Jide…………………………… Sade’s Sugar Daddy Tolu…………………………… Young enterprising Boyfriend of **** act one {1} SCENE ONE {1} [Light reveals the front of Tolu’s house. It is a balcony that is vacant except for the long bench that is seen at the right hand corner resting on the wall which gives the gap between the wall and the bench a triangular shape. Tolu is then seen coming out through a door that leads to the balcony from the inner room which is located at the left hand side of the stage holding **** with him. He then drags **** with him to sit on the bench that is earlier described. They sit facing each other.] ****: [whispering] Why did you drag me out with you when your sister called you knowing well that she needs you to do something? TOLU: [giving a sign of seriousness] Please forget about my sister now because I want to discuss serious issues with you at the moment. ****: [surprised] Why are you turning serious suddenly? [silence] Okay start your discussion. I am all ears. TOLU: [now serious; holding her two hands and coughing out to make his voice audible] I have noticed certain changes in you these days_ ****: Good or bad_ TOLU: [somehow annoyed] Let me land. Ah an. That is what I’m saying. Just let me finish. ****: Okay. I’m sorry. Continue. TOLU: Better. [serious again] As I was saying, I have noticed some changes in you these days that I don’t like. For instance, if I should call you on phone, you’ll pick it and say you’re busy. Sometimes, if I should ask you where you are, if you don’t say you’re in your friend’s birthday party, you’ll say you’re in your cousin’s wedding. Don’t you know I’m always lonely without you around me or as your parents warned you again never to go out with me? ****: No. They’ve not spoken about it for days now. TOLU: Then why? ****: It is just because_ [her phone rings and she withdraws her hands from Tolu’s hold.] TOLU: Tell the person you’re busy. ****: [checking the screen of her phone] I’m sorry I have to answer this call [she stands to leave] Hello… TOLU: Can’t you answer the call in my presence? ****: [giving him a sign that indicates that she’ll soon be back and walking away] Chief, how far now... [her voice then fades away]. TOLU: [facing the direction she passed] I love you Shady. Don’t do this to me. [he hits his right palm on the bench looking worried. After few seconds, he returns inside.] LIGHT FADES ACT ONE {1} SCENE TWO {2} [The light reveals **** beside the wall of Tolu’s house receiving her phone call. She is conscious of her environment as she looks all around to know if someone is watching her.] ****: [smiling] Why not tomorrow Chief…. I’m presently at Ibadan now… I was thinking of coming back to Lagos next week but I can come tomorrow for your sake… P-l-ea-se now. [jumps] That’s my Chief! [realizes that she had shouted; she looks around not realizing that Tolu was watching her through the window of his room. She then speaks softly.] Trust me now, I’ll repackage it for you tomorrow. E ma gba pe mo so be. TOLU: [whispers bitterly] What? Oh my God. ****: [hears a faint voice and looks up but Tolu had bent his head before then. She realizes she was behind an opened window so she left for a more secreted side of the house.] Don’t disappoint me too sir…. Of course I trust you before now. [her voice fades gradually as she leaves that area.] TOLU: [in amazement] I can’t believe my ears. Sh-a-d-y? No!… But I heard it. This useless girl must explain what that statement means to me. [he shuts the window.] LIGHT FADES ACT TWO {2} SCENE ONE {1} [Light reveals a bedroom setting. The light is not that bright to see the faces of those in the room. All that can be heard is soft laughter on the bed. After few minutes, the light shines brightly. By this time, the occupants are already sitting. It is now clear that **** is sitting on the bed with a man of about 40 years old. He is popularly known as Chief because of the number of Companies he manages at this stage of his life but his friends call him Jide. The two lovers are still laughing when Jide’s phone rings.] JIDE: [takes one of his phones that had been arranged on a stool beside the bed and looks at the screen; speaks to ****] Excuse me [he then picks the call] Helloo sweetheart… Yeah… okay… I’ll be expecting. Okay… Love you… Take care love. ****: [irritated] Who was that? JIDE: [sharply] My fiancee. ****: [surprise] Fiancée? JIDE: Yes. You have to go now because she’s on her way here. ****: So fast? What about the deal? JIDE: We can always settle that later. [gets down from the bed] Start to go now. Meanwhile, [he goes to his wardrobe, hangs out a suit and brings out some One thousand naira notes from its breast pocket; handing it to her] you can have these for now. ****: [counts the notes; disgusted] Twenty thousand naira for what? What did you take me for? I say what did you take me for ehn Chief? [still on the bed.] JIDE: [confused; pleadingly] But at least you can still go now. Please, we can settle this later? Okay, will you have a cheque? ****: Better. JIDE: Start dressing. She can enter any moment from_ [a knock is heard and the door opens. Jide regrets not locking the door.] VOICE: Hello darling_ [she enters and to her surprise sees **** on the bed. Jide faces the wardrobe not knowing what to do.] ****: [alarming] What! Geez! Auntie! Is this your fiancé? [Jide turns back at the mention of this; embarrassing silence.] AUNTIE: [softly] Is this your friend’s place ****. You’ll explain this to everyone at home. [to Jide] Good night. [she turns back, opens the door and leaves.] ****: [tries calling back] Auntie, Auntie please wait. [to Jide; amidst tears] You’ve ruined me. You’ve ruined my life. [throws the notes at him, hurriedly dresses then leaves.] JIDE: [contemplating] What have I done to myself? LIGHT FADES ACT TWO {2} SCENE two {2} [Light reveals the living room of Sade’s home. Papa, Mama, John and Auntie are seen in the living room discussing.] MAMA: Did you just say you saw my daughter on the same bed with your fiancé? AUNTIE: Of course. My eyes can never deceive me. DADDY: Mama John, your daughter will explain to me when she comes. Who she got that attitude from must be clear tonight. [faces John] My son, are you not going to the office yet? JOHN: Tolu sent me an urgent letter to ****. I’ll wait till she arrives. DADDY: And if she doesn’t? JOHN: In twenty to thirty minutes time, if I can’t still find her, I’ll be going. MAMA: I’m preparing something in the kitchen. [stands to leave but Sade’s entry stops her and she sits back.] JOHN: Welcome. I’ve been waiting for you. Tolu came here when you weren’t around and begged me to give you this letter today. [he hands over the letter to her and she receives it. She opens it fearfully and as she starts to read it, tears are dropping from her eyes.] What’s the content? [she hesitates] MAMA: [authoritatively to John] Collect it and read the content out. JOHN: [collects it and starts to read]: Hello Shady, Thank you for the pains you’ve put me through. I was there this afternoon when you were calling your Sugar-Daddy or whatever. I heard every bit of the words you said boldly. But Shady, when did you turn into this? Why are you so easy to love? I can remember when we met. You too can never deny that love at first sight. We loved each other and I dreamt of you being my wife every day. But, alas, that love has turned into hatred suddenly. I can’t just explain it. In fact, I’ll feel irritated setting my eyes on you any day of my life. Well, do have a better luck in life. Once Yours, Tolu. AUNTIE: Ah! You ****! You stabbed me at the back. [the door opens and Jide enters in. As soon as he enters, he prostrated flat on the floor.] JIDE: Love, you are such a different woman in the world. I can’t just afford to loose you. I am very sorry for my mistakes. It won’t happen again I promise. I knew it the very first day I met you that you are different. That’s why I’m always protecting you and messing around with other girls. Darling, [he changes to a kneeling position and brings out a case. He opens it and a glittering silver ring can be seen] please will you marry me?[he breaks down suddenly and Auntie rushes immediately to lift him up on her soldier. They both sob for a little while then Auntie raises his head from her soldier and she looks into his eyes.] AUNTIE: Yes![screaming fills the air as the light fades gradually.] BLACK OUT! 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wyre Posted January 19, 2011 LST what does the word S.A.D.E mean:p It's just a name here Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wyre Posted January 19, 2011 The scene takes place at lunchtime on a park bench Characters: SMART YOUNG WOMAN (SYW) CONSERVATIVELY DRESSED MAN (CDM) Scene opens with SYW sitting alone at park bench, reading a novel, while eating her lunch. Very conservative looking man (CDM) enters and very matter-of-factly gives her his business card and introduces himself. CDM: Good morning madam, reliable local rapist at your service. SYW (shocked) What? (defensively produces Mace canister from her handbag and prepares to spray him.) CDM: Local rapist madam, at your service SYW: (relieved) Oh thank God! I thought you said you were Rolf Harris. (she relaxes and puts the Mace away) CDM: Sorry about that, I’ve been eating yogurt. SYW: I quite understand. Now what is it you want? CDM: (points out the wording on his business card) Local rapist madam. Arthur Prozac, reliable rapist and stalking services. Reasonable rates. No job too small. Emergency callout service. SYW: Yes, I can see that. (suspiciously)Reasonable rates eh? What you call reasonable and what I call reasonable may be two entirely different things. What is it then? Fifty quid for just turning up, then fifty quid an hour for a crap job that means I have to get a real professional in a week later? CDM: No, no, madam. I’ve got my reputation to think of. (Points to small print of card) You can see it says here "satisfaction guaranteed." SYW: Satisfaction? Well, it’s hardly a proper rape job if I’m satisfied is it? That would fall under the heading of a date. Are proposing to buy me dinner first? CDM: No, no...er, no that’s a typo. Should say "dissatisfaction. Dissatisfaction guaranteed" SYW: But you distinctly said, "satisfaction." CDM: No..no, not a typo. What’s that other word? You know when you say one thing but mean the exact opposite. SYW: Irony? CDM: Yes, that’s it, irony. Little bit of irony there. Make you chuckle. SYW: Well irony only works if the other person knows you mean the opposite to what you are saying. Otherwise it’s not the slightest bit amusing. How am I to know when it says quite clearly in black and white "satisfaction" that you really mean dissatisfaction? Changes the whole sense of the thing. CDM: Yes, well, all right - SYW: Doesn’t exactly fill me with confidence that I’m not talking to an amateur, when you can’t even say what you mean on your business card. CDM: (slightly rattled). Yes, well, okay, I take your point - SYM: If you ask me, I don’t think you know what you are doing. In fact I don’t think you are a rapist at all. CDM. Well I can assure you madam that I am. SYW: I don’t think so. You don’t look a bit like a rapist. CDM: Well what’s a rapist supposed to look like? Let’s not get into stereotyping shall we? Some of the best rapists I know look like psychiatrists. Come to think of it, they all do. Anyway we don’t go around with "rapist" tattooed across our foreheads. Completely ruin the mystique that. SYW: Well you go around with a business card with "rapist" written on it. CDM: Well, if I didn’t how would you know I’m the real deal and not just someone pretending he’s a rapist? SYW: A little card hardly proves anything. CDM: I can supply references. Police wanted posters..... SYW: You have them handy do you? CDM: No, not actually on me at this moment. They’re back at the office. SYW: Just as I thought. You’re a just a cowboy trying to give the real professionals a bad name. I mean, look at you! You’re not even unshaven and I bet you’ve had at least one bath in the last twenty four hours. CDM: No I haven’t. SYW: Yes you have! It’s obvious! And what kind of rapist walks around accosting women wearing an expensive business suit? That doesn’t make much sense does it? Cost you a fortune in cleaning bills. CDM: I......er, use a blanket. When I’m on a job. I supply my own blanket. So my suit doesn’t get all messed up. SYW: You’re making all this up as you go along! CDM: No I’m not. SYW: Yes you are! You’re making it all up! You’re not really a rapist at all! So what are you really selling? CDM: Look, I’m telling you I am a professional rapist. Twenty years experience man and psychopath. SYW: So you say. But I’m not just going to take your word for it am I? CDM: I don’t see why not. SYW: If I took the word of every Tom Dick or Harry that comes up to me and tells me he’s a rapist, then where would I be? SDM: (fishes in pocket and pulls out wallet) I’ve got a licence. SYW: There’s no such thing as a professional rapist’s license. SDM: Yes there is. Hang on a minute....(finds an official looking licence in his wallet and flashes it briefly like a policeman flashing a warrant card) See? SYW: I hardly got a look at it. Let me see it again. And hold it still this time. SDM: (Holds up license again. She holds his hand steady so she can read the license carefully). There. Told you. (He puts license away quickly) SYW: That is a driving license, with "driving "crossed out and "rapist" written over the top of it in green biro. SDM: No it isn’t SYW: Yes it is! And you’ve even spelled "rapist" wrong . SDM: No I haven’t. SYW: Yes you have! There’s only one "p" in rapist. Otherwise that would be a rapist license and there’s no such thing as a rapist. SDM: That’s the Welsh spelling. SYW: The Welsh spelling? SDM: Yes. The Rapist and Stalker Licensing Authority is in Swansea. The Welsh spell it with two p’s. SYW: No they don’t SDM: Yes they do! Everybody knows that. Look it up on Wikipedia when you get home if you don’t believe me. SYW: I assure you, I intend to. Anyway, leaving aside for the moment the minor details of the spelling and the green biro, how much do you charge? SDM: Just the standard rate madam. SYW: Which is? SDM: Special introductory rate of fifteen pounds for the first hour. Then twenty pounds an hour for all subsequent hours. Additional ten pounds an hour for kidnap/hostage scenarios. SYW: Sounds a bit pricey to me. SDM: Well, it’s a high risk business! But that’s for the whole package, which includes your standard stalking service. SYW: And what does that involve exactly? SDM: Your basic stalking. I do as very professional lurking and loitering. Subtle yet deeply intimidating. It’s a bit of an art.... Give me your address and I can even arrange to be in your house when you come home. No extra charge SYW: Well, that’s very reasonable ...but I’m hardly ever home. Except on Wednesdays....." SDM: Tell you what. Give me your phone number and I’ll even call you up and give you the heavy breathing service. I do a very good heavy breathing. That’s the best deal I can do. You won’t get better anywhere else. SYW: Well, give me a demonstration. SDM: What, now? SYW: Yes. Go on: let me hear the heavy breathing. Somewhat self-consciously SDM does some heavy breathing in SYW’s ear. SYW: Is that it? That wasn’t very good. I wasn’t the slightest bit repulsed. SDM: Well you can see me! That kind of spoils it. You’ve got to imagine I’m invisible. SYW: That’s not it. It just doesn’t sound sexual or pervy at all. A bit wheezy if anything. Are you sure you’re cut out for your line of work? SDM: I’m just out of practice. Not much call for the heavy breathing nowadays. What with the withheld numbers thing and all that. SYW: Alright, we’ll let that go. I’m not sure the pervy phone calls would cut it anyway. Straight to voicemail and then the sinister magic is lost. Okay, so show me what you can do. Give me a demonstration! SDM: Look, I can’t just go around giving out freebies willy nilly. SYW: Suit yourself. But so far I haven’t seen or heard anything that proves to me you are who and what your say you are. So go on then, show me something. TO BE CONTINUED Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wyre Posted January 19, 2011 SDM: I can’t just do a rape at the drop of the hat. I have to get myself in the mood first. Pop some psych medication, watch some porn.... SYW: Just as I thought. Always an excuse with you isn’t there? SDM: I can show you a bit of stalking if you like.... Just a minute or two. Just remember this is just a demonstration so don’t go freaking out on me or spraying me with Mace or anything. SYW: I promise I won’t freak out. SDM: Or spray me with Mace. SYW: Or spray you with Mace. (she has the Mace canister half out of her handbag and drops it back into the bag.) SDM: (Indignant) You were going to spray me with Mace! SYW: No I wasn’t. SDM: Yes you were! You were going to give me a blast full in the face! I’d have been walking around with my eyes all puffed up for a week, looking like bloody Yoda! SYW: Well, alright maybe I was going to give you just a small squirt. Just a small one mind. For a bit of realism. SDM: Well, promise you won’t. Otherwise the free demonstration is off. Cross your heart. SYW: All right, I promise. I won’t spray you with Mace. SDM: You’ve still got your hand on it! SYW: No I haven’t. SDM: Yes you have! I can see it from here! Take your hand off the canister and put it where I can see it! SYW: (She sighs, takes her hand out of her handbag and holds it up) There! Satisfied? SDM (dubiously) Yes.....okay... remember, you promised! SYW: Look, I promise I won’t spray you with Mace. All right? Now can we please get on with this. I have to be getting back to work. SDM: Okay, okay, I’m doing it! Don’t rush me! SDM then stands a few paces away and lurks in nearby bushes and tries to look sinister but does it very amateurishly. SYW (disgusted): Well that was just awful. You look as scary as Harry Potter on Mogadon. SDM: You’re putting me off. You keep looking at me. The whole point about stalking is the victim isn’t standing there with her arms folded, staring critically at the stalker is she? I mean, that just ruins the whole atmosphere. Anyway, I need to get my motivation. (He hunches up, like an actor making a futile effort to find his motivation for a scene.) SYM: Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. That is just dreadful. Now you look like Harry Potter with constipation. That’s the worst stalking it has ever been my misfortune to witness. I’ve known garden gnomes fill me with more dread. SDM: Well, give me a ruddy minute for God’s sake. This isn’t as easy as it looks. I don’t usually stalk on demand you know. And you’re not being very provocative are you? SYW: What do you mean, I’m not very provocative? I’ll have you know I’m extremely provocative. Dozens of perverts would be only too happy to stalk me. Why don’t you admit you just don’t have it in you? SDM: And why don’t you admit you’re as provocative as Marge Simpson? I think you’re doing it on purpose to put me off. Can’t you try wiggling your *** a little bit to get me going? SYW: I am not trying to put you off but if you think I’m going to start wiggling my *** in broad daylight for your benefit, you’ve got another think coming. SDM: Well at least keep your hand away from your Mace. SYW: I already told you I am not going to Mace you. Quite frankly you’d be a complete waste of perfectly good Mace. Look, come out of the bushes before the Park Keeper mistakes you for a squirrel. This is getting us nowhere. SDM (emerges from bushes, crestfallen): I guess I’ve kind of blown the deal haven’t I? SYW: You could say that. You must be the world’s worst rapist, Mr Prozac. SDM: It’s not been one of my best days, I’ll admit. Usually I’m a lot better. SYW: Why don’t you save us both any more wasted time and just admit you’re not really a rapist. SDM. But I am! Honestly! SYW: Oh come on! Admit it! SDM: (hangs head in shame) But I really am! SYW: You’re not fooling anybody. SDM: (caves in): All right! All right! I admit it, I’m not really a rapist. You won’t tell anybody will you? My life wouldn’t be worth living if anyone finds out. SYW: I don’t think anyone is likely to ask! SDM: But if they do. SYW: If they do I won’t tell them you are not a rapist. But why go through this elaborate charade? SDM: If I told people what I really do...Well, I just can’t stand the looks, the sneers, the social stigma.....I get spat at, dogs set on me....... SYW: Well, what is it you really do? It can’t be that bad! SDM: You wouldn’t say that if you knew. SYW: Try me. SDM: You won’t like it. SYW: I’ll be fine with it. SDM: You won’t. SYW: I will. Promise. SDM: Promise? SYW: Promise. Come on, out with it! SDM: Well, if you’re sure. SYW: I’m positive. SDM: (suddenly confident) All right then (whips out clipboard.) Good morning madam, I am Arthur Prozac, your local party political candidate...." Without hesitation, in one quick angry movement SYW produces the Mace from her handbag and sprays SDM full in the face. SDM falls to floor in agony CUT END Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
