Suaal

[Nugul]

Ilahey is powerful, right? if God says be it, it can be as we were told in the quran. why ilaahey did not listen to my duaa so many times. That even cried and cried to help me with things. way adonkaga u dhegysaneyneen oo ku baryey. gaaladaba wax kasta wey helaana.

 

please do not quote me as i intend to edit this after i receive your answers.

[Voltaire]

Did it ever occur to you that he might not after all exist?

[Nugul]

are you a believer?

[Pyjamas]

Firstly, muslims and Gaalo are different. The prophet said this world is like a prison for us and like Jannah for non-muslims.

 

And secondly Allah (swt) does not ignore the dua' of a sincere practising muslim.

 

However sometimes not in the way we expect.

 

The answer comes in three ways:

 

1) The du'a takes places exactly how you asked for it.

 

2) Allah gives you something better than what you asked for. For example you asked for your ill relative to become better. Du'a is the only thing that can change QADR (fate.) So perhaps Allah will prevent the death of your brother or sister.

 

3) Allah says in the Quran what we think is good for us is actually bad for us, and what we think is bad for us is good for us. Only Allah is able to see what will happen if such a du'a is answered and he is actually preventing something harmful that might have befallen you.

 

4) The du'a is granted but spared until the last day where it will turn into good deeds, that could save us from the hellfire.

 

 

 

Sis you just need to be patient, and persist. We should remember Prophet Ayub's story, may Allah be pleased with him. Allah took everything away from him as a test and when his wife turned impatient because of shaytaan, she asked Prophet Ayub to turn to Allah to remove his suffering,

 

He answered, ''Tell me how long did I enjoy good health and riches?"

 

She replied: "80 years."

 

Then he asked: "How long am I suffering like this?"

 

She said: "7 years."

 

Ayub told his wife he was ashamed to ask Allah to remove his hardship. because he had not suffered the amount of years he had been blessed. He lost his wealth, his health and his family. Subhanallah - This story brings tears to my eyes.

 

Allah says in the Quran: "Then We heard his prayer and removed that adversity from which he suffered, and We gave him his household and the like thereof along with them, a mercy from Our store and remembrance for the worshippers." (Surah 21: Verse 84)

 

 

Please my sister in Islam, please please study Islam or these doubts will lead to you to having such weak iman that eventually a muslim would leave Islam all together. I myself am not perfect and have many short comings, insha'Allah I will make du'a for you.

 

 

There are golden times for making du'a.

 

Waking up in the middle of the night and praying Tahajud - the nightly prayers. You can pray as many Raka as you want. Another is when it rains because Allah's rahma (mercy) is bestowed upon us. Also on Yowmul Juma - Like an hour or half an hour before Maghrib.

 

You must have full conviction of Allah and that he will answer your supplication.

 

Also ask your parents to make dua for you (The parents dua' is readily accepted.)

If you can't do that, then ask someone you know is very practising and religious.

[Nugul]

Thanks sister, the problem is not that I am not practising Muslim. I studied the Quran and Hadiths ( in badan) and used to be very strick Muslim and stil am, except my heart. I lived on my own since I was 18 before I met my husband 3 years ago. Those ten years damaged my well-being as I was so isolated and harly had contactes with Somalis. Even the Unversity I went was full of white middle-class people and few Asians who even though were Muslims themselves, were quite racist towards me.

 

Anyhow, I asked God many times to ease things for me. And when my husband finally came along I was already exhausted mentally. Then now, I fear about what if it is me with the problem of not having children? he would leave me for another woman. How would that make me feel? I rather him to leave now than later. so spare me some emotions.

 

God is powerful I believe but why he is not answering my prayers, walahi I ask myself those questions without telling this my husband.

[Aaliyyah]

Allah knows best. Perhaps, you are better off what you asking for?..and also ilaahay haduu qof u nimceeyo nimcadaas wa imitixaan ninku nimcada ka qadona wa imtixaan. Mar walba you gotta do what you have to do as a slave of Allah..worship him, ask and never expect it to happen over night? like oh im gonna make dua for three four days and oh my god why are things not turning around..Do your best and never ever get tired from asking allah swt what you want and inshalah if its meant to be it will happen..tan kale gaalo inay waxkasto hesho maxa ka ogtahay...everyone is tested in their own way. It was only few days ago when I went to the emergency room and I swear mesha wax naxariis ma taalo you see all these white elders on their own (without any family) am sure you cant say that for all gaalos but for many naxariis ma taalo they mostly live in senior homes most likely..inta waxa ka sii xag jira there was a guy beside me this white guy somewhere in his 20s and he had nose bleed (for good half an hour he was bleeding) his sister was crying right beside him cuz the receptionist lady or the nurse or whatever werent really paying attention to him i guess it was like first come first serve typa thing and I talked to her im like lady ur brother is bleeding why dnt u talk to the nurse and she was like shes aware of us ..and walahi alcamdiim am not lying dhiiga sankiisa asaga ka joogsamay without any interferance from the doctor and the guy got up with his sister and just walked away right front of me..it made me think if this was somalia (not that I ever been to somalia) but im sure there would have been a bit more naxariis for this guy as oppose to this part of the country that just follows some laws blindly...heart breaking..tan kale you are probably living abroad somewhere and you have a good life and you are just crying for that few things that you are missing..did you ever think abt ppl back home? those who lost their parents at a young age? those who have lost their husbands? those who have lost dear ones? those who are losing their lives as we speak? those who are hungry? ...and now we act so cadaan with every lil thing that happen to us stressing us out...say alhamdulilah and hope that in time allah swt will improve your circumstance after all whatever blessing that you have now asaga ba ku siiyay! Hope that helps hun and there are time where I myself felt that allah is not listening but I know allah has his reasons and we should never question it!!..

 

Edit - oh so your problem is not having kids I just read that? inshallah sis may allah swt make it easy for you. If its meant to be it will happen. I know a lady who lived with her husband for years and they didnt have kids and yet they are happy and accepted each other till today they dnt have kids. I also know another lady who was married to a guy and they never had kids n they divorced n then married other ppl and both had kids (ilaahay uun ba yaga caruur isku qorin)....so either way wixi ilaahay ku qadaray will happen. I'll add you in my prayers ...Kids are blessing from God but who knows? hw many kids bay walid so korsaday oo khyr ka helin..only allah swt knows what is best for anyone...but inshallah may allah swt make it easy for you. I am sure it is hard but always look for those who are worse....(kuwa caruur ka washeen oo balayo daran ka raceen, kuwa faqri iyo gaajo maanta ku hayso hamar iyo meelaha kale ee somalia, iyo wixi la mid ah)..the grass might always look greener at the other end but it is not necessarily the case...

 

salaam

[Pyjamas]

Sis, you should speak to your husband about this, sooner rather than later. Ask yourself what was the purpose of you marrying your husband? Was it to have children or because you both loved each other? Shouldn't children be a secondary thing?

 

Nugul you should get yourself checked out, because he could be the one possibly infertile or it could just be an unexplainable cause. Some people to take years to have a baby. Afterwards, ask him what he will do if you are unable to have children and vice versa.

 

I'm sorry I can't be more helpful. I'm not married but I've always planned insha'Allah to adopt somali children whether or not I had my own kids in the future. I know in the UK there are many in care homes or being raised by non-somali folks, which is so wrong. We should be raising our kids.

[Ismahaan]

Asalama Alleykum

 

Allah (swt) knows what is best for us. Whatever Allah does, it is for our benefit. So next times you do not get what you are asking for remember it’s because ALLAH (swt) knows best. You should always remember that Allah is with you and please be patient for ALLAH loves Sabirun (the patient). "O you who believe! seek assistance through patience and prayer; surely Allah is with the patient." (Qur’an 2:153)

 

The Prophet Mohammed (scw) said “I asked my Lord for three things, but He gave me two of them, and prevented me from one. I asked my Lord that my nation not be destroyed by a drought, so He gave it to me. And I asked him that my nation not perish by drowning, so He gave it to me. And I asked Him that fighting not occur between them, but He did not give it to me” Muslim 2890. This is a clear indication that not every dua will be answered.

 

May Allah truly keep you steadfast on deen,and make your difficulties easy .Amen.

[Nugul]

Thanks you all, I understand all what you are saying, and in fact that is my basic knowledge of Islam. I do not know whether I am going completly mad/mental or just an ungrateful creature, but I am sure that I am having problems in believing in God. I have been trying to shake off that for a while but it just gets stronger and stronger. Ma ka tagayo xijabka because waan u bartey lakin ma u maleynayo in qalbigeyga uu moslim yahey.

anyway, wahan rabaa in threadkan la delet-gareyo just in case it causes problems for others.

[Humming bird]

Dear Nugul,

 

First of all it wouldn't matter if this thread is deleted or not because ultimately we are not the controllers of other people's hearts...It's God who tests them and who gives them light or takes it away...your mere doubts will in reality have no consequence for anyone apart for the one he wishes to trial..which no one can stop.

 

Secondly, whether God exists cannot be determined by whether He answers your duas or not. God will be regardless of whether anyone gets their wish or not or whether someone disbelieves in Him or not.

 

As for why He doesn't answer your dua..I would say He has the right to do as He pleases. He is not obliged to answer you as He is not there to serve your wishes...still that shouldn't draw you away from being accepting him as your creator.

 

Also sister wearing the hijab has no reward or value attached to it if the faith has already departed from your heart..

 

I would suggest you approach the matter logically not just emotionally and to ask yourself what has happened to distance your heart from God..for example did you start to not agree with the will of God..is that where the conflict began?

 

Whatever it be I hope it enlightens your heart and bestows on it the due submission and faith.

 

I pray for you.

[Nugul]

Gosh.........God, authoritarianism?? He does as He pleases?

 

 

I am a Muslim obviously and willing to remain as such I am just having problems (from now and then). I am doubting my mental status even.

Anyhow, I just want to say something outloud to hear myself and see what others have to say, but I am not getting anywhere with this. How can I ask the moderators to delete this thread so I do not have to worry about what others contributing it have to say. I do not want any misunderstanding here.

[Bashiir]

Speaking to your self, and having questions is usual. Bur don't not leave your faith behind for personal worldly needs as this universal is not long lasting. Make researches, study your persona, and increase your knowledge. Hopefully soon you will come to a strong conclusion which would lead you to either of the two roads. A book would be on either of your two hands. The right, or the left. No third, and fourth hands.

 

For the marriage, and kids better talk to your husband, and see a consultant as well. I know many people who live together for over 30 years with out kids. Some being a close family. Find best way that could help you live with your self and husband.

 

If you doubt your sanity and mental status, just see a doctor.

 

By Allah's will you will be fine!

[Aaliyyah]

saw this on a friend's page definitely inspiring..

"‎'You should know that life is but two days;

A day in your favour and a day against you

 

So if it is in your favour, do not become proud

And if it is against you, then practice patience"

 

That sums it up just be patient hun. astaqfurulaah dont become less of a muslim because you cant have kids? you dnt even know if its ur fault u cant have kids, it could be the guy's. And, even if its you who cant have kids, its not the end of the world...and just like it says at the above comment the world is just two days...aduunku wa labo galin. Ha isku wareerin. I hope you have kids ill pray for you, but if you dont and this dude walks away...there are too many fishs in the sea, or in another more men out there. You'll find one that would love you for you even if you cant have kids..Inshallah khyr!

 

All the best inshallah!

[Malika]

Nugul you need to seek help from a counselor - sometimes its worth talking to someone that wont be judging nor commenti on your thoughts,they will just listening to you.

 

Your being hard on yourself - take it easy. Life isnt supposed to be that hard nor that confusing, just chill. Analyse the things that are making you worry, deal with them in a rational manner - I would even suggest you see your GP - just talk to him/her about your feelings. You sound anxious - you dont want live life feeling in constant worry of 'what might be' and what might not be.

 

Insha'allah kheyr.

[bilan]

check this website

http://www.isuroon.org/

you are in my prayers.