RAISING A MUSLIM CHILD IN NORTH AMERICA

[RendezVous]

Raising A Muslim Child in North America

Ayse Gül Yesilyurt

 

A Mother's Perspective

 

Source

 

My almost 6 year old son looked pretty distressed the other day when I picked him up from his kindergarten. Trying not to sound too anxious, I asked how his day was. After a period of silence, he said two of his friends made fun of me, his mom.

 

They asked him what I was wearing over my head, and laughed at him when he answered "a skirt" (He confused skirts and scarves ...

 

Although I must admit the idea of wearing skirts on someone's head is quite funny, and probably this was what made the kids (and me) laugh, I have been expecting such an incident to happen for a while.

 

Living in a society that embraces different norms of behavior as acceptable and normal than our own has been a burden for everyone in my family. I have learned quickly to ignore stares, or to answer gracefully and with humor when I am asked whether I was a nun while I was 8 months pregnant with my second son (!!) or whether I felt hot wearing all that in California summer, or how I coped with long days of fasting. I have learned to use the curiosity of my colleagues at work or people on the streets, playgrounds, grocery stores or libraries to inform them about my religion. I should admit I find being different "cool", rewarding and challenging. But trying to raise my son (and now sons) as Muslims in the U.S. has been a pretty challenging experience.

 

Of course, we have used every opportunity to let him know who we are, why we are proud to be Muslims, how lucky we are to be Muslims, and how a Muslim should behave to the best of our knowledge. Early on he learned how two angels were recording good and bad deeds. He learned about stories of Adam (a.s.), Moses (a.s.), Jonah (a.s.), and Muhammad (s.a.w.). He is intrigued by the magical powers given to Moses (a.s.). The favorite part of the story of beginning of revelation of Quran is when Muhammad (s.a.w.) was scared of the angel Gabriel (a.s.) and took refuge in his bed under covers, not unlike himself after a scary dream. He identifies Jonah's (a.s.) staying in the fish's belly as a "time-out". He wonders aloud about the powers of Allah (s.w.t.) whether He is everywhere, whether He can do this or that. All of these are pretty normal in the life of a young Muslim child, except for one thing: Most of his friends are not like him.

 

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