Older Women, Younger Men, A Terrific Marriage ?

[Khayr]

Originally posted by OG_Girl:

Hmm, younger guy? hell no...

I want guy older than me atleast 10 years ...means looking sugar dady

 

salam

OG, Shuughulkaas ya kubaarey,

wexey shegasu bal arkaa, wa caajib! :rolleyes:

You planning on a Heist or what with your

Sugar Daddy. Planning on your retirement!

I see, ilaahi ana aa u naxreesto, for the poor

man that u get married to.

Gold Digger on isle 4,

STAY AWAY!!!

 

age should not be a barrier and prejudice that blocks the very advances and steps a young man takes to talk to an older woman

Nur saxib, what if the sister has hit the age where she can't have children, she's not that attractive but Masha Allah is a good Muslimah.

 

Would you go after her, knowing this and that u have never married and don't have kids?

 

Jabir b. 'Abdullah (Allah be pleased with them) reported: We were with Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) in an expedition.When we returned I urged my camel to move quickly as it was slow.There met me a rider from behind me and he goaded it with an iron-tipped stick which he had with him.My camel moved forward like the best that you have ever seen. As I turned (my face) I found him to be Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) He said: Jabir, what hastens you?I said: Messenger of Allah, I am newly wedded. whereupon he said: Is it a virgin that you have married or one previously married? I said: With one previously married.He said: Why not a young girl so that you could play with her and she could play with you?...

In other rewayeds (narrations) the term Virgin is used instead of a young girl(in the english translations at least!)

 

From this hadith, the lessons that can be learned are:

-In marriage, physical attraction is important so as to protect the believers from Lusting for people other then their spouse and committing Adultery.

 

-Youthful/Virgin companions for the male are

preferred!

 

-The Rasul (salallahu caliyhe wasilm)was aware of the personal affairs of the Sahaba and what they did in their homes, impacts the rest of the sahaba. Hence, the naseeha/advice given to the sahabi/companion.

 

-Youthfulness in women

is preferred when seeking marriage partner.

Its not Haram to marry someone that is Older, or not a virgin but for a Man, according to the above incident in the seerah, the preference is for virginity and youthfulness.

 

Their is rationale to the deen too.

Yes, the rasul (salallahu caliyhe wasilm) married Khadijah who was older then him, but he also married Ayesha who was very young and if u look at how many hadiths are narrated by Ayesha compared to his other wives, you can see that more time was spent with the Aisha, the youngest wife.

 

Anyways, I better put on the ARMOR,

cause I can just hear the ARMY marching like that of the armies of Mordor in Lord of the Rings! :eek:

 

Fi Amanallah

[OG_Girl]

Khair, what u said now ?

why u feeling sorry for my husband to be ?

well, that is what i want a sugar daddy with nice looking not old geek

 

salam

[Som@li]

a/c

 

i think age does not matter, if u love the person, who cares about age?. but still i believe older women are wiser,,and it is nice to be with them.

 

there was story long time ago in somalia, it has more flavour in somali.

 

Oday wayn oo waayo arag ah baa damcay in uu u guuriyo wiilkiisa oo markaa da diisu tahay 27 jir.

 

Wiilkii markii hore waxa uu guursaday garan 5 sano ka wayn,oo carmal ah ,Odaygii abihiis baa habeenki arooska ku yiri Caawa lax iska dhig, oo gabarta ha u juuqin, waxna hasamaynin,gabarta sariirta dhinac uga jeenso.

 

 

Arooryadii baa odaygii wiilkii u yeeray,,oo waydiiyay wixii uu habeenkii kula kulmay, wiilkii waxa uu yiri habeenkii oo dhan xod xodasho bay igu waday, markay wax iga waydayna waxay tiri "WELIGAY KAN OO KALE MA AAN ARAG".

Odaygii waxa uu yiri gabartan iska fasax,,kuuuma fiicnee,,,wiilkiina waa ka yeelay

 

marlabaad baa wiilkii waxa loo aroosay gabar da'le'eg, oo ah 27.

 

sidii si la mid ah buu samayeey arooryadadiina odaygii baa waydiiyey waxa uu la kulmay...waxa uuu yiri markii ay wax iga wayday,,oo i xod xotay,,bay tiri"KAN OO KALE WELIGAY MA MAQAL"

 

 

odaygii waxa uu misna kula taliyey wiilkii in uuunan tan haysan karine fasaxo,,waana ka yeelay..

 

waxaa misna loo aroosay gabar jirta 18,,sidii si leg buu sameeyey,,arooryadii markii idoygii waydiiyeyna waxa uu yiri..markii aan u juuqi waayey,,iyana iima juuqin,,oo baqdin waa siiseexatay..odaygii waxa uu yiri waa taan kula rabay....sidii buuna reerkii ku dhaqday

 

 

sheekadan ama been ha noqoto ama run,,waxay ku tusaysaa in raga Soomalidu sida caadada ahayd guursadaan gabdho ilaa 10 sano ka yar.

 

wasalaaam

[Valenteenah.]

In the past, Somali men married at an older age to younger women. Why? Because men didnt marry wily nily. They worked (mostly abroad), they saved, then they came back financially able to marry and support a family. This basically meant men married in their early 30s and afterwards, usually to young women of 15 and above.

 

Now, we cant deny circumstances have changed incredibly within the last 2-3 decades. Men marry at any age now, whether financially able or not and women are more financially independent.

 

So, does that change the situation? Of course it does. While a woman marrying a younger man was a taboo not long ago, it seems to be fairly widespread at the moment. A new phenomenon, definitely, but what is responsible for this increase? Is it because more men now want to rely on their wives'? Is there an increase in male 'gold-diggers'? Is there no stigma attached to being a dependent man? Are women becoming more financially successful? Perhaps, all of the above?

 

I dont know. Personally, I suppose I could accept marrying a man who was one or two years younger than me, but 7? I dont think so, not when he would be the same age as my youngest sister.

[Valenteenah.]

By Khayr:

 

Yes, the rasul (salallahu caliyhe wasilm) married Khadijah who was older then him, but he also married Ayesha who was very young and if u look at how many hadiths are narrated by Ayesha compared to his other wives, you can see that more time was spent with the Aisha, the youngest wife.

Aisha (RA) was definitely the Prophet's (SAW) favourite wife. But think, the Prophet didnt take another wife until Khadija (RA) had passed away. Which makes me wonder, would he have married any other woman, if Khadija had lived longer? As for children, if I recall, it was Khadija who gave the Prophet his only children. The rest of the prophet's wives (including Aisha) either couldn't have children, or their children died soon after birth.

 

What does this tell you? Whether Allah (SWT) blesses you with children or not is not dependent on your wife's age. Marrying a young virgin does not guarantee you offsprings, does it now?

[x_quizit]

DnD...well said. No need to add my 2 pesos, u pretty much covered it.

[raula]

Khayr--Aisha(R.A.) is included in lots of narrations(Hadiths) because she lived longer and got to witness the prophet's life even after the "revelations" were revealed to him(Waxyi). Remember Khadija (Raximullah), even though stayed with the prophet (S.A.W.) longer than his other wifes, died very early on at time when the prophet was still in the process of being revealed (the Quran and religion in general)to him. Therefore, do not strengthen your basis that the prophet(S.A.W.) preferred Aisha(R.A.) over others due to her younger age

[rudy-Diiriye]

how come is only ladies answering this thread! shoot! i know u ladies will love younger man!! Raula, and all u ladies strain your fantasies!! dhuunes ha nogo nina!! :confused:

[Macalin]

Is there an increase in male 'gold-diggers'?

----Parhaps there is!...

 

Lets see,do i wanna marry an older woman?,that depends for the reason...

 

if shes OPRAH, Yes..otherwise theres no chance

 

On a serious note,i dont mind a mature woman,however 7yrs older is kinda far reach for me..

[raula]

Rudy...myself if young(18) so, younger than that' would be a crime(child molestation) brotha! :mad: