can somali girl marry black american?

[fartun]

pple i just want ask yo guys if yo can stop love that last 4 years, and what should i do stop, i been trying to stop but it wouldon't work for me so what should i do pple. i told my b/f to leave me alone that and i did show him that the topic, so i don't know what to do, he is crying and he told me that he will never broke up with me? so help plezzzz

[Hibo]

fartun, first of all as a muslims, we should not have b/g friend. well, if you make a decision, then stick with it. you are only 19 and hey, there are plenty somali men around.

[Motor Cycle Cruiser]

Hey sister fartun:

If you are really convinced that he is NOT the man for you, then you really need to give it a sincere effort to break it off. Do NOT just pointing him to this site and let the Nomad brothers and sisters do the talking for you. I am not much into the theory of stereotyping people and I certainly wouldn’t judge one person on the action of another but some of the points made here by my Nomad brothers and sisters are pretty much valid. In the final analysis you and only you can make your decisions and live the consequences.

Now, you wouldn’t like my advice but there it is anyway: You are very young, you need to channel your energy towards building your career, concentrate on your study, at your age, boyfriends (regardless of race/ethnicity) are nothing but a distraction.

 

[Libaax-Sankataabte]

Well said Motor Cycle ... I couldn't have agreed with ya more ...

 

[This message has been edited by Libaax-Sankataabte (edited 03-20-2002).]

[Deeq A.]

What do you mean "black American"???????

 

Aren't you Somaliyes blacks? Whats wrong with us marrying each others? I am confused now

[LadyFatima]

Salaama All,

 

Farahkhan, Well we are all "blacks" technically speaking but we have different cultures and customs which we live by,

and that makes it difficult to marry one another atleast for me.......Anyway, Read this Article perhaps you will understand why it is better to stick with your own kind!

 

Ma'salaama

 

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The many shades of black

 

By Darryl Fears

The Washington Post

 

After arriving in America, masses of impoverished West Indians and Africans see a land of plenty — and don't understand why black natives haven't flourished. At the same time, what most African Americans know of black immigrants comes from foreign news accounts and Hollywood, partly because little is taught of Africa or African Americans in U.S. schools.

 

 

NEW YORK — Nearly two decades have passed since Odehyee Abena Owiredua arrived here from Ghana, but she can't truly say she has lived the black American experience.

 

She once rented an apartment in Harlem, but "I didn't feel comfortable around African Americans," she said. "I have not dated an African American, because very, very few approach me."

 

 

"I love black people, but there is a negative relationship between immigrants and African Americans," said Abena Owiredua, 34. "They look down at me, not at me. I feel inferior around them. It's the ignorant questions I get. 'Do you guys live in houses over there?' When I get those kinds of questions from black Americans, I feel very hurt."

 

As she talked on the dimly lighted mezzanine of the Times Square hotel where she works, Abena Owiredua described a little-known reality: America's black community, which now includes more West Indian and African immigrants than ever, is no longer the monolithic group that many politicians, civil-rights advocates and demographers say it is.

 

A new African-American community is being forged, sociologists and anthropologists say, in which culture and nationality are becoming more important than skin color. It is as diverse — and as divided — as the Latino community or the Asian-American community, each made up of migrants from numerous nations.

 

In Miami, the West Indian population — now 48 percent of the black community — is expected to surpass the native-born African-American population within eight years, according to Census Bureau projections. In New York City, nearly one-third of the black population is foreign-born, according to an analysis by demographer William Frey. And an analysis of census figures by the Boston Globe showed that one-third of the black population in Massachusetts is foreign-born.

 

"This is an important story for demographers and policymakers who are used to lumping together the black population," said Frey, a white University of Michigan demographer. "The foreign-born African Americans and native-born African Americans are becoming as different from each other as foreign-born and native-born whites, in terms of culture, social status, aspirations and how they think of themselves."

 

In New York, the brown-complexioned man or woman on the street could easily be Haitian, Jamaican, Senegalese or Nigerian. In Boston, they may be Cape Verdean. In Washington, D.C., they might be Ethiopian, Eritrean or Somali.

 

Yves Colon, a Haitian immigrant who grew up in Brooklyn and now lives in Miami, said black students at his high school thought "I was just another brother until I opened my mouth." Donnette Dunbar of Harlem said black Americans seem surprised when she returns their greetings with Jamaican slang.

 

Detroit native Sunni Khalid learned that things were not so different in Africa when he interned at the U.S. Embassy in Nairobi in 1982. While walking to work one day, he saw Zeinab Said, a striking Somali, from across the street and followed her to work.

 

He quickly learned that like most Somalis, Said is extraordinarily proud of her heritage. It took everything he had learned of African history at Howard and Johns Hopkins universities to convince her that he could understand her more than most foreigners could.

 

But that was only the first barrier the couple had to overcome. Said's relatives, especially her brother-in-law, frowned on the affair, calling Khalid the son of a slave.

 

"They wanted me to marry a Somali," she said. Soon, Somali men she did not know were knocking on her door. "I didn't want to marry someone simply because he was a Somali," Said said.

 

The brother-in-law forbade Said's sister from attending her wedding to Khalid.

 

When Khalid and Said moved to Washington in 1983, she was startled to see so many black people in her new home. But she quickly discovered they were not nearly as knowledgeable about Africa as her husband.

 

Once, Said mentioned to an African-American woman that she is a Somali and had lived in Africa. When the woman asked, "Do you speak the ooga-booga language?" Said was startled. "What's that?" Said asked.

 

She speaks three languages — Somali, Swahili and English — and at the time knew nothing of Tarzan movies, where such insulting characterizations of African language can be heard.

 

Meanwhile, Khalid had his own problems at Howard University. Black women he knew looked past his wife's chocolate-colored skin and focused on her narrow nose, straight hair and thin lips. "Sunni has gone and married a white black woman," he recalled a friend saying. He lowered his head for shame while recounting the story at his Baltimore home.

 

His wife stiffened with indignation. "What is a European feature?" she demanded. "What is an African feature? It is an insult to a Somali for someone to ask if you are half-Indian, the way African-Americans do. I am not an Indian. I am not white. Only in America. When I walk in London, no one would mistake me for a Nigerian. They look at me and say, 'You are Somali.' It's education, education, education!"

 

But little is taught of Africa or African Americans in U.S. schools. An almost exclusive emphasis on white American and European history is a legacy of second-class citizenship that African Americans endure, said Jemima Pierre, a Haitian-American anthropologist at the University of Texas in Austin.

 

After arriving in America, masses of impoverished West Indians and Africans see a land of plenty — and don't understand why black natives haven't flourished. They don't realize that black Americans were enslaved the longest, and that after emancipation, they lived for a century under legal segregation.

 

What most African Americans know of black immigrants comes from foreign news accounts and Hollywood, Pierre said. She was hard-pressed to recall a major motion picture about Africa — "Out of Africa," "Gorillas in the Mist," "I Dreamed of Africa," "Congo" — that was not set in the jungle.

 

"Think about it," she said. "If you're being bombarded by these images of poor, destituted countries, you don't want to be associated with that. Think about Tarzan in Africa. You don't want to be associated with all those people who were depicted as savages. All you know of Africa is primitives, war, destitution, hunger."

 

Last year, Will Smith, the black American actor, traveled to Mozambique for the first time during the filming of "Ali."

 

"Everything I knew about Africa was a solid 80 percent false," he told a reporter for the Los Angeles Times. "I was embarrassed when I realized there were tall buildings and Mercedes and big cities and fine women.

 

"I was so miseducated. It has the best and worst of everything."

 

Ethiopian Lily Assegid said Africans also stubbornly hold on to stereotypes. But she said they can fade away with time.

 

"When our parents came to this country in the 1950s," Assegid said, "many of them went to white schools, the better schools, and didn't interact with African Americans. What they were learning about African Americans was very prejudiced.

 

"But they didn't see themselves as what they were hearing African Americans get called. They said, 'No, no, no, we're Ethiopians. We're Africans. We're different.' They would go back home and spread these stories."

 

Now, living in Washington, Assegid doesn't believe a word her parents and others said: "As far as I'm concerned, African Americans are as much a part of Africa as a newborn child right now. They're a part of the people. The only difference is the culture they were born into. I believe that for all black people."

 

 

 

[Hibo]

you know i don't know how to say this but im not trying to sound all harsh or cruel but as i was reading the respons and your questions sis it just sound like to me that this guy doesn't even exsite is just a way for you to see how somalin guys or girls would react to this type of question,,,,you said you were 19 and go to clifornia...im not trying to diss your way of presenting you self but im just sayiing that you just sound just like some one who is not serious about things and you really don't sound like a college student,,,,this my last year of H.S and i really think you think more like younger than you really say you are but i just want to let you know taht you need to stare acting like an adult,,,if he really loves you is not about the gifts he buys you but is all about if he respects you and your religon and if he does he is would converd to Islimic religion,,,,,,,,,and don't take this the wrong way sis you letting out what is in my heart

[Naasir]

**Fartun** I know you already made up your mind even though I belv you are acting and not facing such decision, but be careflu not to call names your people(somalian), and it is ok if you don't see yourself as one of us, no need to repeat cuz my brothers and sisters said it all, but ama say couple of things one said by our sis **Lady Fatima** Remember U made your bed, just don't forget to lay on it later when he beats the Sh*t out of you and you're living in Shelters, and am gonna add one thing, Somali's said "Waxaad dhuuso u malaysid ayaa xaar kugu noqdo" in other words just in case your too proud to dig your culture and language it means "what you think is a funy could turn the truth" again it means you are faking this idea but you could be on your way of doing it...BUT IT IS YOUR CHOICE YOU DON'T HAVE TO ANSWER TO ANY BODY ELSE EXCEPT GOD IN HERE AFTER.

As always just a thought, keep the

Later My Nomad Bro/Sis

 

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[Hibo]

If u love the guy (which u probably do considering u've been with him for 3 years)

 

He's Muslim (which u said he is)

 

He wants u as much as u want him!

 

He cares for u, makes u happy, makes u smile, simply makes ur day when u see him!

 

Walaal go for it, don't hesitate!

My sister is married to a white Muslim man he's also American & she's happy, so is he, to me dats de most important thing.

 

& between u n me, he does the cleanin how many Malis would do dat? lol.

 

But whatever u do, let ur parents know. I'm sure it will be a shock @ first but they'll overcome it Insha Allah coz they love u & only want whats best 4 u! Trust

 

4rom ur sis ExDane

[Mombasa_QUEEN]

Most people in here dont get the question let me tell ya what i think when it comes dating african american.

 

First nothing is wrong and its not haram unless he is a mulim,second its a good experiance to see what african americna got under there zip lol, third try it and see for ya self lol

[Tuujiye]

By mombasa..

second its a good experiance to see what african americna got under there zip lol, third try it and see for ya self lol

...........lol..Feebaro aa ku haayo yaah..lol..

 

wareer badanaa!!

[- Femme -]

Can a somali girl marry an african American

 

Some people need to sue their brains for lack of support. I swear that question needs to be taken out, gagged, and shot.

[Mombasa_QUEEN]

looooooooooooooooool@sue u got jokes but damsel aint none wrong with that ya somali ppl take all the shyt serious ya need to chill out. matter fact most somali gurlz marry african american guys coz ya cant handdle ya own gurlz lol.

[Gediid]

^^^^Tell it like its supposed to be

[Qac Qaac]

The question i have, is we didn't gabdho iyo wiilalba get used to marry to the Bantu somalians, most of the ppl way ka faani jireen specially the girls, and now african americans waa caadiyoos. what is going on... is it tv.. that changed our mind.