Do our women support their men?

[QUANTUM LEAP]

They say behind every successful man is a woman. Does this statement sound true when it comes to Somali men? So far there has been a lot said about this faraax and that faraax, that guy in a factory job and this uneducated guy.

 

Could it be that there is not enough encouragement from our women and that they don’t bring the best out of their through support. Hence the apparent failures.

[Fuaad]

First of all, the statement " behind every successful man is a woman" is absolutely wrong.

 

Second... Never take seriously shallow teenage mentality such as this farax or that.

 

our women alwayz support from childhood years to the end.

 

I'm just keepin' real!

[The Rocks Chick]

It is true that, there is a woman behind ever successful man.

 

But I think, for you to get the support you must have the ambition.

 

No woman will blindly support a man with no ambition ( I know I wouldnt), it is a no win situation.

 

xoxox

[Manala_garaad_baa]

salaamu calaykum.

 

Althought the statement is true but somalian ppl has been through a lot 4 last 12 yrs and when they came to the quba most ppl who had wonderful life at back home has to start from scratch. Those men who are the bread winner and educated has to learn new language and culture etc etc.. So most of men , they choose factory work or unskill jobs as they left their families back home and they need to support them.

 

Also most of western countries support women and children but do n't support the men. For exmaple in the UK, women and children gets income support and child support and house. While men or young women have to sing in every 2 weeks and they get less support from the government. It is hard to work and study at the same time.

 

Anyway that is what I think others may have different opinions.

 

salaam.

[petite]

iska "support" leeh miyaa??. Like the rock chick said..a guy has to have ambiton. Personally, I find it tiring and waste of energy to be a cheerleader for someone thta doesn't want to win.

 

Another thing...blaming women for a guy's failure is rediculous, sounds too much like the "wixi xunba xaawaa leh" of our parents' generation.

[QUANTUM LEAP]

A word support and a little endearment helps motivate him rather than mostly dish out the negative criticisms. Living with your family should be a partnership rather than an individual fight for survival and that goes to the ones who say an ambitionless guy is more of a water carrier. If the ladies can’t support their men then there is no point in ever becoming a couple or even a family.

[Armstrong]

Salamu Alaikum,

 

Wa Alaikum Manala Garaad baa ? I agree with you and hey Fuaad saxiib you are right the statement behind every successful man there is a woman is wrong ??? For me the statement should read as follows;-

 

"Behind every successful man there is FOUR women"

 

Personally, I think in general most good somali women support their husbands and encourage them to do well in life. For example, somali women take care of the family and do their upmost to secure successful relationships with their patners. In addition, a major dillema is how can the women encourage men who are out 24/7 chewing Khat in the local Marfish getting marqaan who earn no money for the family and are not involved in bringing up their children and even use their welfare money for the purchasement of several mijins

 

I am not trying to say all men are like this but merely making a point here to say that somali women should support somali men and somali men should support somali women . For me it is a two way thing you simply cannot blame the failure of some somali men on the poor innocent somali women who have put up with them and their bad philistine habits all this time Only God knows why some somali men have become less successful please look at yourself instead of pointing the finger at the women.

 

This is my honest opinion and I hope this is seen a sincere contribution rather than a repulsive comments. I thank for your time and I end with the customary greeting:

 

W/Salaam

 

Mujahid over and out !

[QUANTUM LEAP]

There is no such thing as blaming someone here rather asking a genuine question that needs some serious imput. Its asking whether Our ladies support their men as much as they should or not! Simple try to understand the question and answer it accordingly.

[Manala_garaad_baa]

asalaamu calaykum waraxmatullahi wabarakaatuh.

 

Mujahid walaal AFKAAGA CAANO QABOOW LAGU QABAY.

I agree with but our somalia ppl has change so much while we came to qurba and we trying to adopted others ppl cultures and attitude. Althought most women do their best to support and encourage their husband to do well also their so many of us who are challenging their husband.

 

also there is problem we are not think or act as couple but as individuals and we are not communicating very well. He may be very chatting at the marfishka and she may very chatting on phone to her friends.

 

salaamu calaykum.

[SCORPION_SISTA]

well shaqsii it seems to me u got a lot of things on ur mind this past few days judging from ur new topics.

but anyways to answer ur question,i cann't speak for all somali women but i can speak for somali women in my family, and u bettcha they support the men in our family. My grandmother supported and encourged my father to pursue heigher dreams for himself. My mother supported my dad when he wanted to get another degree and supported our family for the past 4yrs by herself. My aunts supported their brothers when they needed to establish themselves in foreign countries. So yeah in our somali women support and provide encourgment,but also a man must desire and want to achieve sucess from within him a woman but makes the road traveled worthwhile.

that's my 1 1/2 cents on this topic.

[Bachelor]

Wonderful topic indeed!

Certainly behind every successful men there is a women and i strongly believe that. As far as i am concerned there is no one supportive and defending of there men than Our sisters/wifes (somali). We as a men are not up to the task of supporting our sisters.

[QUANTUM LEAP]

Scop Sis I do not have any baggage as you suggested, its just a simple topic to see what everyone has to say about the issue. My conclusions as to the question would be reserved until such time I will have something to say about it.

 

Bachelor - I would say you are right in the sense that behind every happy man is ahappy woman/family hence it having an effect in how well he does.

 

Everybody has an opinion and has every right to air them out. So lets have more pros and cons for the question.

[_xamdiya_]

asalmu calykum

 

shaqsi to answer u q, most of our women support their men but the problem is does the man listen when his wife gives him an advice?

what i am trying to say here is that she can't always give out advices or be there to support a man who doesn't listen to her or take notice of her.

And the other thing is that its gotta work both ways he has to be there to support her in whatever she does and not use her as his slave.

 

wasalaam.

[Xafsa]

You cannot blame the failings of one person on another. If a somali man is not educated or has a dead end job it is no ones fault except his own. It all depends on how much your success means to you...you think you can't be successful with out a female to pat you on the head when you do good or to bandage your wounds when the words attacks?

As a women I would not be supporting a man who, like the rock chick said, has no ambition.No one wants to be on a sinking ship....you support someone who has a vision for them selves..someone who plans on their future.

There is this hadith that goes something like this: Aduunyada u shaqeeyso sida in aad waligaa dhimaneeyn, aakhirana u shaqeeyso sida in aad birri dhimaneeysid.

 

salaam

Xafsa

[QUANTUM LEAP]

Xamdiya walalo- Your right to certain extent when you say there are men out there who don’t listen to their women and always take them for granted and I have seen a lot of them too at work. The reason why I have asked the question is that I have seen over the years a lot of men bashing around here which has made me to prompt off this debate. Men usually do work hard even in dead end jobs to help the hungry n the homeless in Africa. He can’t afford to stay away from the dead end job because the fact remains without him they would starve to death and maybe even homeless. Most girls here don’t often have to suffer so much helping out their families back home although I’m sure there are some who do so. That often leaves a lot of time on their hands to better themselves education wise and ofcouse work wise too. In most cases too its the men who support the little ones while going through school and college and make sure their kids get a real education rather than him doing so. So it’s not so nice to pass the back that easy when the guy works a dead end job or does get abetter standard of education.

 

Xafsa- A man who doesn’t have any motivation sometimes is a real pain but at the same time if he doesn’t have any then someone has to be smart enough to encourage him and who else other than the ever so lovely sister, mom or wife to do that. If that don’t work then I would say it’s a waste of time too.

 

I saw an episode in technology thread (Where are the educated and professional men?) that tells why I was prompted to ask the question. Try reading and see what afew of the ladies here say about their men folk.