ARAWEELO Posted April 3, 2002 BEING RAALIYO IS NOT A BAD THINK AFTER ALL MR. MATOTE. IF MY MAN TREATS ME RIGHT I WOULD DO ANYTHING. MUTUAL RESPECT AND UNDERSTANDING IS THE KEY TO A SUCCESFUL RELATIONSHIP. BOTH MEN AND WOMEN SHOULD BE THERE FOR EACH OTHER THROUGH THICK AND THIN IF YOU KNOW THE TRUE SENSE OF THE WORD. THE SUBJECT WAS WHY WOMEN PUT UP SO MUCH WHEN THEY ARE IN A BAD RELATIONSHIP? Text Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 3, 2002 These roles to me were set from the day we were born. I see some mothers that say, n believe me, it happened. " waryaa maxaa jikada ka rabtaa...hadaad cunto karis baratid naagtaada waa kuugu shaqeysanee, dadkane waa kuula yaabaayaan"... I was shocked...but than most somali mothers think, kitchen is for girls, a guy all he has to do is change his clothes, sit, get food that was preset on the table...n leave. Most of them don't carry the empty dish back to the kitchen...walaahi its horrible. To resolve this mothers need to be educated about the necessities that revolve around unlimited gender roles. Women stay in most marriages coz, they want their children to have aabo, n there is nothing wrong with that. I would do, all that n more. I don't believe in divorce. I married him, so i better stick to him...otherwise, I need to be wise b4 I say I do. ------------------ Each one of us is a masterpiece in progress Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
raula Posted April 4, 2002 Hibo walaalo.. I agree w/u..totally..but roles r not set from the beginning....ofcourse that was then when oppression of somali women existed, but it also depends on how ur parents raise u sis..walaahi.. take it from me..I didn't grow-up w/both my parents...I have raised myself since I was 4yrs old....I consider myself a very strong woman..but shyt happens...4 real...life has ups & downs...it's only u who got to make the decision to do the right thing...sometimes things might be rocky..& u gotta except that when u get ur self into marriage...however, it's ur courage/strengh, endurance, communication, tonicity of voice,love....etc..that makes a difference..neva take shyt from a guy..walaahi, even if it means 2 die..I would rather die..than live in hell-life... our culture has a hierachial system that ranks everyone,but it seems to be changing...however, u got to make that transitions & long search to find the 1...that'll suit u...a man might have all the qualities u r looking 4..ie...education, money, materials, successful, comes from a well-known family,..etc..but if he is not willing to put up w/ the hardships of marriage inorder to keep his family 2gether...& doesn't truely luv his family...he is upto no good... Patience is a virtue, but suffering is a vice... Personally, I will neva put up w/shyt from a guy, I learned the hard way....If I witness anything wrong happening 2 my family, I/we take care of business...no negotiations(oodoyaal..oodoyaal) or watever that our culture follows...2 hell w/dat... midwesta Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 4, 2002 Great topic, but I believe nobody can be mistreated unless they let it happen. Most women seems like they predict their own failures and set themselves up. Forinstance, lately the Meher (the dowry money), women ask $10,20,40k believing the saying haduu i furo berri ma feer baa i jaban, Koleey waan Jabiyaye. The man also thinking to himself, Haa mar uun ha ii soo gacan gasho. Duh! what is the motives of getting married, if you've animosity and negativity built inside of you to begin with. I do not think that will lead to a healthy everlasting happy marriage. We should get married with a clean heart. No wonder so many women's pillows are filled with tears rolled down from her face everynight she goes to bed. To make my story short I'm not feeling sorry for Somali females as they'r the only ones to blame for their failures. Thats my story and am sticking to it. Peace out. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kool_Kat Posted April 4, 2002 First and for most iga raalinoqda, I haven't had the time to read all the responses... Most women get married for all the wrong reasons: -they feel they are getting too old -they get pregnant, and try to cover it by getting married -they are too young -they are unhappy at home with family -they are inexperieced with life itself, therefore always depend on the man -they are uneducated -they don't take the time to get to know the other person. So for those who get married for those reasons are the once who are unhappy. To me, before any woman gets married, she should be independent, well educated, and secure a good job. She should be happy with herself, and life style. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
commonsense Posted April 12, 2002 I've actually seen a tiny man beating up his huge wife... I wondered why is she not stomping on his a$$. I would have cooked some oil and dump it on him while he is sleeping, then his a$$ would be in the burned victims unit for decades. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ayaan8321 Posted April 15, 2002 I only got one thing to say....stand up for your right women,don´t let any man put u down,as ashkira said "only you have the ability to change your life." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Valenteenah. Posted October 10, 2003 Interesting responses. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
