Single Brothers Seeking Second Wives, Serious question

[FatB]

I was speaking with a friend recently, a single brother who has not been married before. He said that he has given up on finding a first wife and wants to go straight to a second one. His rationale is that he has so far found it difficult to find a first wife, and since it appears that many married brothers have no problems finding a second wife, that he should perhaps go down that route instead.

 

This did not make much sense to me, but then it occurred to me that perhaps he is trying to find a second wife to be his first wife. That if he could find a woman who was ready to be his second wife that he could just accept her as such, which would do away with the need to find a first wife in the first place.

 

I was happy with this assumption and so I did not question his logic, but I did challenge him on the relative merits of such a move. He then shared some of the advantages, one being that a woman who is prepared to be a second wife will, in general, have lower expectations in a husband, which should result in more marital harmony (married men will understand this). He also mentioned the subsequent ease of marrying a third wife in future, or even skipping third and going straight to fourth.

 

From the way that he explained it, it seems that everyone wins, but I am still not sure about it. What do the brothers think? Are you adamant on marrying a first wife first, or would you consider marrying a second wife to begin with?

[Yaabka-Yaabkiis]

:confused: second wife does not seem to marry not- married- man.

 

Yaabka-Yaabkiis

[Buuxo]

^I know confusing.

 

Fatboy, saxiibka nin naagtiis buu u kululyahay,yuna kukala micneeyn.

[Yaabka-Yaabkiis]

looool....ceebeey tacaaal

[Som@li]

Fatboy, saxiibka nin naagtiis buu u kululyahay,yuna kukala micneeyn.

 

Buuxo, is this a problem?

 

The story which happened in hargaisa, a man marryin two/three in one night, may have helped some Faraahs,

[chubacka]

How wierd....jst tell your friend to look for a sister, he is jst confusing things!

[Faynuus]

If he tells her that he is married to another woman and she accepts that, then they marry and she finds out lator that mr goodie is A LIAR! how will she trust him?

 

Your freind has a SERIOUS low self steem and he lacks confidence. Nin saas ahna naag wax kuma falayso.

 

Waxaa marka ku tiraahdaa gabdhaha amaan sii ha hoolaaline.

[chubacka]

^ hahah can you imagine when she finds out he was lying about having a first wife, after she went so far protecting him against everyone.

 

bismillah she will think "wot kind of man have i married?!" but i dnt think he can maintain such a lie all the way leading up to the nikah.

[Yaabka-Yaabkiis]

loooooooooool@bismillah she will think "wot kind of man have i married?!"

She will be like: Ninka cudurka naag naagoowga muu qabaa....

[Aaliyyah]

You should never start a relationship by lying. How can she trust him later on if she figures out he was lying at the beginning of their relationship....besides why would one pretend they have a first wife when they don't?

[Biixi]

Is your friend in a mental institution?

[Ibtisam]

Loool, niimaki somaliad waa waashiin!! Say WHAT?? He is going to pretend he already has a wife!. lool

 

Sorry honey but what ever is putting women marrying him now will put so called 2nd wife off as well. Tell him to man up, pull up his trousers and haablaah nacnacad kaal taag plz. What kind of story is that?? :rolleyes:

[Nephissa]

He's basically saying, single women overlook avilable/single men and head straight for the "taken man." So, he pretends to be married to attract the honnies. L0L. Alloow yaa dharbaaxo.

 

Ask your friend this: If a single woman would pursue a married man, are those the kind of morals of a woman he would want a relationship with?

[Intuition]

Your friend requires a sanity test, knock on the head, some tips on shukansi 101 and some bloody common sense. What your friend lacks is game. Some people are born with it, others need to try a little harder.

 

He's concept is a joke and should be laughed at. You need to stop encouraging him and tell him to just dust himself off and get back on the horse. We do not want to lose yet another bother to insanity!

[Faheema.]

Originally posted by

Nephthys

 

Ask your friend this: If a single woman would pursue a married man, are those the kind of morals of a woman he would want a relationship with?

Clearly his definition of marriage is a little obscure to say the least… Lakiin, if he wanted a wife so badly, he could just export one from back home. Though I feel for any one who ends up with a man who entertains these ideas.