Sensual_Healing Posted September 30, 2004 As-salaam Alaykum Nomads. what do you all think about your mother in laws? Ofcourse those of you that are marriad, Well i have one thing to say about my mother in law i think i HATE HER! no matter what i do nothing pleases her she brags about anything and everything, she's even making me hate my hubby:( we're a newly marriad couple and he can't afford to get his own apartment so we decided till january we settle down at his mothers house, and i must say being a wife is alote easier than being a daughter in law. The woman loves to Gossip about everyone which makes me a bit insecure. i Don't Trust her and she's too demanding, i have talked to my husband about her mis behaving but his always saying Sabr Sabr Sabr! :rolleyes: But for How long?it's been almost four weeks and i feel like going back home.i thought it would all be soo easy because my husband is very helpful and he does almos everything but now i feel guilty letting him do any of the house work because that witch is on the watch Out. Let me Know about your in laws inshaALLAH As-salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jacaylbaro Posted September 30, 2004 The best thing 4 everyone is to live far away from his/her mother in-low, at least not in a same house but even to be a neighbour would be enough. the problem is that when u live same house, and Somali mother-in-lows are always problematic when living with her. I have one but avoid to live with her, it is better to see her frequently, visit her and so on,,,, But i don't advise u to go back to ur home at all ,,,, it is shame of da shames,,,, just be patient till January as u agreed with ur husband then u'll be free,,,,,,,, U said u love ur husband ?? just keep him with u whatever it costs coz u can't leave him coz of his mother while he is GREAT HUSBAND ,,,,, am i right or wrong ??? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Xoogsade Posted September 30, 2004 Good advice bro Jacaylbaro. Sensual, January isn't that far. I suggest you keep your patience to make your marriage work. You will make your husband sadder by putting pressure on him when he obviously lacks the means to find you a separate living. There are worse things many women endure to make their marriage work than irresponsible mother-in-laws. Once you move out, the problem will hopefully end. PS: I don't have one Just wanted you stay with the poor husband of yours and that you don't destroy a home so new. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sensual_Healing Posted September 30, 2004 As-salaam Alaykum once again.. Al 7amdulillah he loves me sometime si think he loves me too much, but we'll see in time InshaALLAH. when i said i want to go back home i meant take him with me, there's noway i would leave him and Make Du3a ppl, you see i have this feeling even when we move out she'll still naag my husband she uses her husband being dead as an excuse, and him being the youngest and the only son doesn't help! Puts me in alote of pressure and him, i know i sound like a sulk right now but it's soo Bloody Frustrating seeing that old bag barking behind my back, how can i lean to respect her yet alone love her lol im turning this into some sort of a therapy session But i really need to tell this to some ppl i don't know jeceylbaro and Xoog sade Jezakullah khair for your wonderful advices. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mombasa_QUEEN Posted September 30, 2004 First sensual healing congratulation... i really dotn know much about these but i have seen it happen in a good way and it comes from my mom... my brother is married for 7yrs now mashalah the wife is sweet,nice and hottie so one thing i have seen is she just love being around my mom alot and my mom is just to nice... second my sister is married to these guy mashalah the husband is nice and friendle and he really enjoy talkign to my mom,but when it comes to the husband family walahi they just hate us for one thing and thats qabil shyt walahi iam not lying for us we really dont give a shyt about qabil but hes family i swear to god twice they tryed to ruine hes marrage,but if the love is strong nothing is gon happen. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Salafi_Online Posted September 30, 2004 Sensual HEaling, IM sure your mother in Law is muslim, BUt i sincerely advice you to stop this backbitting! i suggest you sit with the young lady and explain to her how you feel! if not i'll do it for you Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Khayr Posted September 30, 2004 Salaamz, from what I've heard from other married couples -PROBLEMS ALWAYS SEEM TO EXIST BTWN HUSBAND'S MOTHER AND THE WIFEEEEEY! Its a STRANGE PHENOMENAAAA! Caajib walaahi! :eek: It can be explained but there will always be problems, just be patient (isbir!) I don't though that ANY MOTHER would cause such a distrubance with her son's family to the extent that her son would become divorced. Its caeeb for the mother to have a child of hers become divorced, so don't worry Sis, she's just SHOWING YOU LUV DIFFERENTLY IN HER OWN WAYYY Fi Amanillah Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LayZie G. Posted September 30, 2004 Lmao@mombasa Queen, u crack me up, but gotta luv the way this girl tells her stories...Big upS Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
silent-sistah Posted September 30, 2004 S-H , salaam sis, congratulations on your marriage, and all i can do for u is pray for u sis, like everyone said, sabir. i wouldnt advice you to have it out with her, because there is nothing worse than if she over-reacts to a simple point u make - older people are set like rock in their weird ways..and u sometimes just cant reason with them... stop putting pressure on ya hubby,,,,try and spend time out of the house, just the 2 of you.. or both of u visit your famiyl and spend ramadan with them...see, u aintmoving out, but u taking a break, but diguise it, so she thinks yur family envited u or something.... before u know it sis, it will be time for u to move into your new place...and no matter what, u always gone need this mother in law... while your at hers....try and get aong with her..sometimes, u have to swallow your pride, principles....if she wrongs u, do her right...u seem like a sister that practices....just read how the sahaba coped with these situations,,,some had kuffar in-laws....but they alwasy did them good. try hard sis Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mombasa_QUEEN Posted September 30, 2004 Laziegurl for sho i got love for you to. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
- Femme - Posted September 30, 2004 Her husband is dead, and now her only son is going to be living with and loving another woman while she is alone and feels unwanted........MAYBE YOU SHOULD JUST FEEL SORRY FOR HER INSTEAD OF HATING HER. Im not picking on you...but I feel I have to since were presented with only ur side of the story. Did you ask her why shes acting this way? Maybe you should tell her how you feel. Maybe you guys just misunderstood each other and each of you is waiting for something from the other that they feel they deserve. OR MAYBE IM JUST RUNNING OFF THE MOUTH Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bess. Posted September 30, 2004 mashallah....on ur nuptials....congrats sis....from wat i have seen mother in laws are always fussing with thier son's wives.....but u have to remember that this person is his mother and u don't want to come btw a man and his mommy....so i would advice u to chill...it can't be that bad....accomodate her....and just be the best u can be....i'll bet she won't be able to find fault with u and will let u be .....try finding some common ground with her, there must be something u can do together...like cook for ur husband together....take her to lunch.....gossip with her....do wateva it takes to make ur home happy....u might end up in the future looking after her....besides ur poor hubby must be feeling all the tension in the house....try taking him and having a nice wkend out of the house....it must be putting a strain in love life....being in the house with his mom peace Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nuune Posted September 30, 2004 posted by Queen but if the love is strong nothing is gon happen. so true, I like that Line Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mombasa_QUEEN Posted September 30, 2004 nune you better lol kidding. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sensual_Healing Posted September 30, 2004 Jezakullah khair for everyone that participated in this, You see i know she feels threatened by me and i don't understand that but i can get used to that, SubhanaALLAH Godforbid i'm not trying to compete with her, she's my husbands mother and MashaALLAH she raised him and made him what he is today im ever greatful to her, but she needs to just back off!! i know she's old and she has no hobby, By the way Salafi online wallahi i don't mean to gossip, al hamdulillah she's Muslim aha sufi type! she makes me all nerand i do feel sorry for her and i respect her because vous i can't even look at her without Trembling your turning around it's like i have to obey her or something. as long as im concerned she's not my responsibility only my husband is my responsibility i wish she understood that, at least than we could sit have a cuppa and chat AWAY. you know it's kinda ironic i've always heard from relatives from sisters about mothe rin laws but never imagined i would be talking about my mother in law SAD innit? Allah - Hafiz Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
