Baashi Posted November 3, 2003 x-quizit, But i challenge u to answer my q that i asked previously that u and Khayr decided it was not important enough to reply to...so again i ask u...would u stay home and stay with the kids if ur wife earned more money than u or would u let ur "manly" pride get in the way and want to be seen as the man of the house?(see more detail in my previous post for this q) NO! Not because of my “manly” pride but because the idea of ‘who earns less stays home’ is materialistic in nature and quite frankly un-Islamic. Materialistic in the sense that money is the determining factor. Un-Islamic in the sense that family leadership is redefined (Qur’anic law specifies who is doing what). Swapping motherly role and breadwinner’s role is unnecessary and uncalled for. Needless to say, I don’t mind staying home if and only if I can’t meet my obligations and responsibilities. BTW, whatever wife earns is hers and there is no obligation for her to cover the family expenses. Hence, logic dictates that no matter how little husband earns he has the responsibility to go out to work. Flying-still, But we need to seperate what is and what should be Below are a few lines from your post...the way I see it all though there are brothers out there that will do as mentioned below there is a greater number of brothers that won't or can't. In that case what is a muslim women to do? I don’t know. My ‘cilmi dhegood’ says if the husband tries his best but comes short then we have ‘fakhri’ and ‘sabir’ is in order. But if he neglects his duty and responsibilities then the wife may seek divorce. Needless to say, if she has his permission she can work provided her conduct outside home is within Islamic perimeter. This is purely ‘Cilmi dhegood’, I don’t know what the deal is perhaps Nur can give us definite answer. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kowneyn Posted November 3, 2003 Hablayahow hadma guursandoontaan? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paragon Posted November 5, 2003 The more the chances of education are granted to women, the more the population growth stabilizes. The more educated women become, the more they bear well-informed future statesmen and women. A superwoman gives birth to a son or daughter with the same gene pool, and as a result, that strength is manifested in the place a country stands in global political and economic power. If it takes a husband to accumulate wealth in 100 years, then with the help of his wife, that 100-year period is shortened to half, and in turn the family unit can be on other projects that are in line with the betterment of the society they dwell in. This is basically human capitalism, and every system, whether religious or not, needs a capitalistic approach to put in place the foundational infrastructures for a successful society. If the culture forbids such progress in a society, then that culture should be discarded and replaced with an efficiently operative one. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SuNsHyNe Posted November 17, 2003 I'de like to think that I am a bit of both! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Vanquish_V12 Posted November 17, 2003 What has always bothered me is those of the XX gender that claim the reason we XY demonize educated working women is because we feel threatened. in my case and along with many others, i can assure u there is no such fear. but only concern, caution and wanting to avoid the traps western women has fallin into. and this notion of bein independent its a mirage, let me all tell u a sectret, only Allah(swt) is independent, the rest of us are slaves to some1 or something. all of u who r familiar with the feminist movement know full well, the transformations their principle dogmas had to go through, all because after decades they finally realized, the same rights they fought for and paid heavily for, had brought them nothing but more enslavement. now a word of advice for all u young girls, now1 knows better than Allah (swt) and Allah in the Quran tells women is better for them to stay in the house, and we all agree the Quran is universal and applies to all times. hence, its only logical to do what is best, passed on the most informed source. of course its not haram to work as long as the religous requirements are fullfilled i for one would prefer my wife to stay home even. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lol Posted November 17, 2003 Dawaco good topic sis... well I am late but like they said better late than never... so here is my two cents... I think most of us ( Somalis ) have adopted alot of the western mentality and confuse between being a traditional woman and a super woman. If I elaborate in my own definations... Traditional woman to me is one who knows how to adjust to changes and fulfill her natural role (to bore and bring up capable children and to attend to her family's every need). Super woman is one who tries to alter or change the role Allah created her for. Don't misunderstand me sisters. I read some of your postings and you tend to believe that it would be a waste to go to school for 18 years only to end up being a housewife. You are wrong if you reach that conclusion. When you have a degree it is an asset for the family. As we all know, mothers play the most vital role in shaping the personality and ambitions of their children and rarely do the fathers make a difference. Your education will be the foundation for your kids and their future. It will be route for perfection. I don't know if you guys have really had a thorough conversations with your sisters/mothers who have been a superwoman in their entire lives. I am sure they will tell you, that every inch of their body ach and their wish that they had stayed at home and taken care of their children.. My mom has been a working mother her entire life and believe me she has done a great job in bring us up but then she regrets being a superwoman. And wishes that she had stayed at home. Most of us hate to be referred to as housewife mainly because we believe that it is an inferior word that is used to define a useless being. Trust me its completely the opposite. Stay-at-home-moms are the backbone of the family and without them, the great nations you see today won't be in existence. I don't know if you the sisters follow the news of the Feminists but majority of the western superwomen are now realising their mistakes in taking up the jobs of their husbands while fulfilling their role as well. I may not make a whole lot of sense for majority of you but this is just my opinion and shouldn't be taken as a sign of weakness or woman bashing, but I don't think getting education has anything to do with having a career.. Education of the girls is important cause tomorrow if something happens to the fathers, they can sit on the drivers' seats and not need instructions as to how to turn the wheel. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites