are you a traditional girl or modern superwoman?

[Raxmah]

Asalamu alaikum

 

Sucessful Career does not equal an unsucessful marriage and vise versa. It all depends on the person, how they balance their life and how to go about getting what they want.

 

As for me, I would say am more of a modern women, I'm not planning to be stay at home mom--even though I know for sure there will be time when I will have to put my career on hold for my family's sake, but it doesn't mean it's impossible to do both at the same time, I know alot of women whom were able to do it and still are doing it. Why not me. I haven't spent all this years in school to be stay at home and cook. If you have goals and know how to acheive them, nothing is impossible.

[Saalixa]

dawaco,

sister don't forget an educated sister will educate her children when they cum from scool and her first expression won't be "ahh why don't u wait for your father to cum home and he will help".

plus ur children will look up to you and have greator respect for you when your in a higher state and position than the average housewife.

 

well thats what i truely believe. Sistahs shouldn't rush into marriage like they will never get married. They should first finish their studies because they older you get, the harder it will be to actually still carry the book and pen especially when your a female, because you have children that depend on you 24/7. But ofcourse sum sistahs might disagree with me.

salamz... :cool:

[Reality Check]

^ amen!

[Qac Qaac]

also rayaana the older the sister gets the more likely men don't want her. just keep that in mind too.

 

opinionated pls sis i know the seerah too, and i know the prophet used to work for khadijah. but khadijah wasn't ur ordinary 2003 charlie angel sisters ok. so pls know the difference then jump to the conclusion.

 

she was rich woman, and when she got married to the prophet. she made the prophet feel like he is the man of the house. tell what woman now adays do that.

[Reality Check]

So you are now telling me that women can not be the boss of men?

 

and that the example set by Khadijah should be ignored?

[Changed]

she was rich woman, and when she got married to the prophet. she made the prophet feel like he is the man of the house. tell what woman now adays do that

what makes u say they wont or they dont ..are u a woman , do u know what goes on in a womens minds ...answer "NO" ..then i would say stop generalizing , being judgemental and stop being a sexist..

[dawoco]

Modesty, i am not generelazing anyone, i am just talking about the different choices SOME somali women make.

I think you have taken my words out of context. When i use the words modern and traditional, i don't mean reer baadiyo/reer magaal, but rather females that want to do things the way it was done back home and those who by all means have respect for the culture, but also want to be an individual firstly and somebody's wife secondly.

Being someones mom is a blessing, but so is being someone who has developed her education up to a stage where she can be the pride of her country. Both types of females are equal and you don't have to mis out on one just because you are classified as the other.

 

Raxmah,i agree with you 100%.....

[Juxa]

well,,,,,,i think education is important. but as they something/someone got to give,,,,as in to suffer. so unless u find balance either the children suffer or the woman suffers lack of education.

 

so how about,,,,taking a career break once a child comes along,,,,,,and going back gradually, like working part-time or when yr husband is off work like weekends or afternoon.

 

as i said with good planning and careful thinking there is no reason why we can not have it all

[- diamond princess -]

at the end only the practicing muslims women, who didn't get brainwashed. will win. now argue all u want girls.

Qac Qaac Are you telling me that suddenly women who want to have successful careers don't practice Islam. :rolleyes:

[LuCkY]

Raxmah And Rayaana I agree,You Guys Raise Some Very Good Points.

[PrettyYoungThang]

To be a traditional woman or modern superwoman seems to be the million-dollar question, and to me i think i am BOTH. I mean, in one hand i do want a family and the other i want/need education to educate my daughters/sons adequately to handle various jobs or professions and whether to kindle the flame of ambition and self-reliance in their minds. So to have both wouldn't be that bad at all. Cause in a way, you're getting 2 things in the price of 1. If that makes sense to you guys.

 

Jaaaaaaaaaaaawe

[African]

Dawaco, excellent topic sis. From responses that I read the majority of you want or have already pursued to become a career women & want to postpone marriage.

 

I love the way that many of u argued the importance of striking the balance of getting education/career and raising a family.

 

What I would like to know is did any1 of you think of the problems of delaying motherhood. Plz I don't want any1 of you to misunderstand as I see myself of being in the same boat as most of you, so the point that I want to make is a fact of life that as women get older her chances of conceiving is less. Not to mention the increase of developing breast cancer & so on. Sisters I don’t mean to scare, but plz do look into your health factors instead of neglecting it and thinking that it won’t happen to you.

 

Those of you who know more about Islam can perhaps shed some light into the following ahadith.

 

1. The prophet encouraged people to marry at a young age.

2. Its obligatory for every muslim & muslima to get education.

 

As we know the youngest age we can finish our degrees is 22 & as most of you don’t want to waste & pursue ur career straight away, then think about marriage. Lets say the earliest age you get married is 24-25.

 

So what do you think???

[Thinkerman]

Thats a great idea i concur

 

BY THE WAY AM NOT A WOMAN

[Saalixa]

also rayaana the older the sister gets the more likely men don't want her. just keep that in mind too.

Qaa Qac, brother i believe it all depends on the individual. if you go for a girl and u look at her age before her personal/moral being then you got it wrong. plus someone who truelly loves you wouldn't look at that would he?

 

and one more thing, don't tell me somali men are actually young when they want to marry. because they are not. they are 38-40 and they marry a girl back in somalia who's 17-18. that's child abuse since these men could be old enough to be their fathers. So why is it important that the girl must be young and the man its a different story? and let me tell you a girls body doesnt change even in her thirties if she never marries so don't give me that crap about "oh her body just ain't the same and she gets ugly"

salamz.

[Sophist]

Hi there, without sounding old fashioned sod with sexist trait, i will say this: THE BEST career for inteligent lady is to nurture her children. Of course this does not mean ladies should not go to higher education and get mental stimulation-- these days the later is indeed in scarcity. I think what the above sister had said about health issues should be thought about too-- though I hardly think there is much difference of getting married when you are 23 or 26 years of age.

 

Sophist