Does the complaining ever end?????

[SCORPION_SISTA]

Not bad suggestions…I left Somalia when I was about 10 yrs old, and even then I would probably be correct in saying that women’s situation was difficult prior to war…I remember my aunt who wanted to become a doctor or a professor of medicine at this university, but because she was a female, a man with a lower grade point had her position…And there were many stories I remember being told about what job women would or could have done or not done those times…Do u think many men during those times were concerned about the improvement of women’s social situation? But it is good to see at least one man concerned with it today, could it be possibly the western influence on you…Let me see if I can give a bit of feedback of what I feel in regards to these issues at the moment…So first of all, personally I feel Somali can do these to improve our social situation:

1. Forget about how your parents raised children back in Somalia. Become an active parent in your children’s upbringing and education. Mind you this goes for both man and a woman.

2. Don’t practice double standard of treatment and expectations from female and male…Treat your children as equal, if a girl needs to learn how clean or cook, a boy should be taught the same.

3. Educating daughters to think for themselves. Do things at their own time, not like everyone else…A little of independent and individuality doesn’t hurt anyone.

4. Understanding Islam and explaining it to children rather than passing on practices (including misconceptions) so that we have a better equipped Muslims…

5. Most important I feel, teaching our next generation TOLERANCE…

6. Stop providing excuses for men to not participating in the process…

7. Behaviors such as women sabotaging other women, partying every night, taking welfare, not communicating with their own children, are some of the things I feel needs to be immediately addressed…

Hmm I think that’s what I have on that part for now…

 

As to second question…I guess I really can’t say what exactly a “Somali Culture” is for definite…But when I think of culture, I think of language, arts, institutions, beliefs…Therefore I answered as such:

1. The way we celebrate Eid…At least how my family did it was different than Arabs celebration way.

2. Introduce them to type of clothes we have…Although I would have hoped our clothes were more decent especially dirac and more confident so it’s wearable to schools or what not like Indian clothes are now….

3. Sending kids to duuqse (sp)…It was an experience I enjoyed tremendously myself…

4. Respecting elders or anyone older than oneself by 10 yrs or more…Meaning a person should be polite at all time, if possible, to someone who they might not personally respect or gained their respect yet…

5. Expose them to Somali music, dances, and embroidery…Hopefully by then, someone might open a Somali dance classes for next generation…

6. As to cultural institution, the one institution I would not expose them to, is “Tribalism”…It’s enough for them the Somali identity no need for more than that…

I believe that’s all I have in this category…Maybe I will have more when I think of marriage and children…

 

Now as to one of the finale question, I personally can’t claim I had helped any Somali woman back home and even here, beside translating and providing transportation I can’t claim anymore…It is not that I have tried, but I am ideologically not in the same dimension with most of Somali women…Therefore sometimes I am viewed as too westernized by others for my ideas…But I am going to share them regardless now:

1. Health: complete education of women in regards to women’s health issues…Starting with educating women about their own anatomy and body functions. Providing classes that would teach women about birth and early parenting skills necessary, so that women wouldn’t have to run to their mom’s when they have babies, they would now and learn on their own…

2. Encourage young women age 15-18 to seek higher education levels…So that we can decrease early marriages level and early child bearings…

3. Women who live around same neighborhoods or community, should create organizations or clubs so they can speak to other women about problems their community or their own children and themselves face…Sort of like an advice or support groups…Of course first they have to get rid of the fear of gossips and bad mouthing…

4. As a daughter, what I do for my mother/father, or others can do, is always ensure your parents continue with a yearly medical check-up and be aware of genetically susceptible diseases that might exists…

 

I should stop now, I already written too much…Hope this makes sense or is useful…Bee Bye

[Xafsa]

^^^^^loooooll Its like your playing catch up.

Nicely written though...good job hon.

[Valenteenah.]

U think all we are doing is complaining? Really UD? I thought we were only defending our gender from all sorts of accusations from urs. It seems as if we cant do anything right nowadays.

 

I myself thought it was the guys who were full of complaints..."too westernised", "dhaqan is only for the females", "responsible for high divorce", "basically evil" and similar tripe, but I could be wrong, of course.

 

Useful topics you say? Maybe like safety and "self-defence tips for women"? Hmmmmm...I wonder what's been happening to that topic of late?

 

Education? Oh no, disaster!...by discussing the importance of education, what if we all decide to delay marriages and in the process become spinisters by 26? No, education is definitely bad (altho almost 70% of the population is illiterate)...maybe we should leave education alone.

 

Well, what about business, I hear you ask? Hmmm...could be tricky as well. As u are aware, Somali women are quite obsessive about having careers and talking about business may...well, may make us want to...actually GET JOBS! :eek: ...A cardinal sin, I believe.

 

Sure, let us have some useful topics. It should be interesting to see how long we would be able to explore issues together before u start blaming and knocking us back.

 

Have a nice day.

[Thinkerman]

As u are aware, Somali women are quite obsessive about having careers and talking about business may...well, may make us want to...actually GET JOBS! ...A cardinal sin, I believe.

loool

 

I am lucky enough to have very good examples in my parents. And Its simply not fair, or realistic to expect that our somali women will be happy to just be house wives, expecially if they have gone through the hardship/stress anxiety and ecstacy of studying.

 

I for one pray ((INSHALLAH))) that i will meet someone who will, along with being willing to share her life with me, and bearing me a small tribe of my own , have a good appreciation of business as that will only help strengthen the household and the relationship.

[Geelaay]

Originally posted by BARWAAQO:

__________________________________________________

Education? Oh no, disaster!...by discussing the importance of education, what if we all decide to delay marriages and in the process become spinisters by 26? No, education is definitely bad (altho almost 70% of the population is illiterate)...maybe we should leave education alone.

_________________________________________________

 

BARWAAQO, ARE U SAYING WOMEN BECOME SPINSTERS AT 26 YEARS OF AGE????????????????????

 

I am just wondering what the age is for Somali women to call or men for that matter to call them SPINISTERS.

Is that mean U are not 26 yet??????? or U counting yourself with the SPINSTERS?

[Xafsa]

^^^^ barwaaqo was being sarcastic...

[Nefertiti]

Barwaaqo darling couldn't agree with you more on that. It seems to me that the only people who complain in this forum are the men. I personally am sick of all the stand by Sheiks(rejects of life more like) in this place, who as soon as a sister says something 'controversial' are at hand to 'help out and educate'. :rolleyes: . Nothing wrong with that you would think : IF they would help that is. But they're not!!!! :rolleyes:

 

Flying still, you tell him girl, That is what I call ignorance, not willing to consider the other individual's point of view..... But that is most Somali men for ya.....

[Gediid]

^^^^^^^ Generalizing once again are we :confused: :confused: :confused:

[Nefertiti]

^^^Oh dear, Is that how you saw it, That wasn't my intention really... :rolleyes:

But you have to admit the majority here speaks for the minority.

[N.O.R.F]

Dont worry sistas, I love all of ya, <<<<gettin in the good books!

[Gediid]

Originally posted by Nefertiti:

^^^Oh dear, Is that how you saw it, That wasn't my intention really... :rolleyes:

But you have to admit the majority here speaks for the minority.

So long as am in the minority there you are right otherwise

[Xafsa]

Originally posted by Northerner:

Dont worry sistas,

I

love all of ya,

<<<<gettin in the good books!

Is that love enough for all of us?

[Macalin]

Salaams!

 

First-I dont LIKE this business of ppl telling others whats good and whats not GOOD~

 

This is the internet and u will find anything and anything on the NET, aint no way to FILTER this things-

 

Here in SOL We are FAMILY and FAMILIES talk abt anything WHY AA DADKA AFKA LOO QABANAA?-let them speak, WHINE ,COMPLAIN and TALK GARBAGE!-so long as the ADMIN is fine with it-then U should be cool.

 

Abt the Social issues U mentioned, they are indeed nice and good, but is this the RIGHT medium?- coz most of this kids in here really don wanna know abt social stuff-well if it involves 50c and beyonce Maybe (am not saying anything-just the demographics-thats all!)

 

anyways peace OUT-^ Dadka afka yaan loo qaban-thats why somalia(and other afrikan nations) is in SHAMBLES coz qof baa dadka wax usheegaye-nameans

[- diamond princess -]

I don't know about you people...but I like complaining! What's so wrong about that?! What's a lil complaining gonna do? If it hurts you sorry about that...that wasn't our intention. Suddenly what makes you think that only women complain. I believe men complain just as much as women do.

 

Anywayz if we don't then we wouldn't be humans!

 

.:peace n luv:.

[-Serenity-]

Barwaaqo, whatever you were on when u wrote that post...remember to take it everyday!