lovely me Posted April 15, 2003 b]Would you forgive a lover, who was unfaithful towards you?[/b] Why do you think people cheat and have the need to get attention or sex elsewhere? have you ever been unfaithful? how did you feel? have you ever been cheated on...? how did you feel? what did you do? did you go or did you stay? Wa Salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TASHA Posted April 15, 2003 intersting topic lovely me........ Forgivness is away to move foward instead of the the resentment and sorrow that lies in your heart . It's easy to say you forgive someone but your heart takes awhile to heal its open wound . As for a cheating partner I have not delt with someone who was unfaithful to me sometimes woman put there faith into an unfaithful partner and the bond is broke so is the trust it will take them alot of hard work to actually start over again if thats what they wish to do ......... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SCORPION_SISTA Posted April 15, 2003 loooooooooool lovely me i got to say u picked a very suitable avator, a person that continues to hammer on non-stop....But u know what they say curiosity killed the Cat so watch out... Anyways let me see about ur questions: Why do you think people cheat and have the need to get attention or sex elsewhere? Because they want to and can it's that simple... have you ever been unfaithful? :eek: Nope how did you feel? Nothing have you ever been cheated on...? Nah :mad: how did you feel? loool nothing what did you do? well let me think.....NOTHING did you go or did you stay? Now if i was cheated on then i am leaving no questions about it....My friend actually gave me a nick name "Goodbye you are the weakest link" lady...I guess cause i don't give second chances...hmmm I am proud of that title.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Senora Posted April 15, 2003 Why do you think people cheat and have the need to get attention or sex elsewhere? Im not really sure have you ever been unfaithful? yes how did you feel? i still regret it......... have you ever been cheated on...? yup how did you feel? the same way my ex did when i did it to him what did you do? broke up with him immediately did you go or did you stay? I already answered that Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jamilah Posted April 16, 2003 Asalamu Calykum, Indeed an interesting topic, I would never and i mean never forgive an unfaithful partner :mad: I have never been cheated on.....well that's beacuse i have never dated. But if i did and were cheated on i would not forgive him. It's as simple as this he decided to cheat and i decided to leave and not forgive. salam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sweet_Muna Posted April 16, 2003 alsalamu clykum, love this topic, i was thinking of posting something like this.... thankx sis i am not gonna answer all the questions but my man cheated on me before. he felt da need to, you know how it goes. of course i said no. i caught him cheating on me with some somali girl i knew. Did i forgive him? hell no and i would never take him back :mad: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DA_BEAST Posted April 17, 2003 well 1st i have never been cheated on and never needed to cheat, so that means ain't no way this topic is for me so i gotta bounce outta here folks. later. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mizz-HurriCane Posted April 18, 2003 PeAcE B WiTh YaLL I know that PpL cheat cuz of lack of Eemam so there for the sisters and brothers in the first place should look for a good muslim partner.. The one who fears ALLAH SWT the most would not even gaze at another woman/man let alone touch them. as Allah (SWT) says, "And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and guard their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.) and not to show off their adornment except only that which is apparent (like palms of hands or one eye or both eyes for necessity to see the way, or outer dress like veil, gloves, head-cover, apron, etc.), and to draw their veils all over Juyubihinna (i.e. their bodies, faces, necks and bosoms, etc.) and not to reveal their adornment except to their husbands, their fathers, their husband’s fathers, their sons, their husband’s sons, their brothers or their brother’s sons, or their sister’s sons, or their (Muslim) women (i.e. their sisters in Islam), or the (female) slaves whom their right hands posses, or male servants who lack vigor, or small children who have no sense of the shame of sex…" (An Nur 24:31) It is forbidden for a man to look at women who are strangers to him (i.e. who are outside the Mahram relationship). He should lower his gaze as Allah (SWT) ordered him, "Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.). that is purer for them. Verily, Allah is All-Aware of what they do." (An-Nur 24:30) N the Prophet (SAW) said, "It is written on the son of Adam his lot of zina (fornication/adultery), that will inevitably afflict him: The zina of the eyes is looking, the zina of the ears is hearing, the zina of the tongue is talking, the zina of the hand is assaulting, and the zina of the foot is walking; the heart desires and wishes, and the genitals affirm or deny." (Al-Bukhari and Muslim) In fact, lowering the gaze is a good deed a Muslim is rewarded for. The Prophet (SAW) said, "No Muslim whose eyesight falls inadvertently on the beauties of a woman and then lowers his gaze, but Allah will credit for him a worship he will appreciate its sweetness in his heart." (Ahmad and Al-Tabarani) I think you all got the point...inshallah.. Fi AmaaN ALLAH O u T Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mizz-HurriCane Posted April 18, 2003 Oh and alwayz forgive.. Forgiveness is of two types: 1.We forgive someone when we are unable to take vengeance. This kind of pardon is, in fact, tantamount to patience and forbearance and not to forgiveness. In other words, it is a kind of helplessness and debility, a kind of tolerance. 2.We forgive someone when we have the power to take revenge. The forgiveness desired by Islam and its leaders relates to his kind. In the Holy Qur'an Allah has proclaimed the following: "Turn to forgiveness and enjoin good and turn aside from the ignorant (7:199)". "And if a false imputation from the Shaitan afflict you, seek refuge in Allah; surely He is Hearing, Knowing (7:200)". "Those who spend (benevolently) in ease as well as in straightness, and those who restrain (their) anger and pardon men; and Allah loves the doers of good (to others) (3:!34)." ----------------------------------- Imam Ali (A.S), Commander of the Faithful, in his testament addressed to Malik el Ashtar stated: "Fill your heart to the brim with mercy, kindness, and affection towards your subjects. Never act like a voracious 'animal' towards them, availing yourself of tearing them apart, for they are your brothers-in faith or your equals in creation. So grant them the same degree of pardon and forgiveness that you hope Allah will grant you, for, you are above them, and he who appointed you is above you and Allah is above him who gave you this position". The Imam also said: "The most deserving person to pardon others is the one who is most powerful in punishing others". "Subdue your anger and forgive a guilty person while you are in power". "When you gain power over the enemy, consider forgiving him as a sign of your gratitude for your power". Fi AmaaN ALLAH Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Iffah Posted April 18, 2003 LovelyMe... I can't participate in your survey. But if the above happened to you...I'd advice to you forgive...but never forget! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ProudSista Posted April 19, 2003 Salaamz Have you ever been unfaithful? Yeap How did you feel? fine I guess Have you ever been cheated on...? yes! How did you feel? good, For he told me the truth! Did you go or did you stay? I left) But he still is my very good freind! I would always forgive, but nah i would not forget, and from the past i've learned my leason! Nice topic sis! Much love! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Legend of Zu Posted April 19, 2003 HMMMM.. :eek: :eek: :eek: I c many gurls have been cheaten...So My argument with the brothas that somali women would neva cheat is not valid..... Hmmmmmm The Zu Wisdom says " I am wlong (wrong) aftel all" Cheers Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shyhem Posted April 19, 2003 legend of z U must be one naive brother,u still believe somali women are different than other women,give me a break.U c, everything u have done or heard is equally done in large scale by the somali women. As for the survey i don't consider "cheating" to a women i'm not married to as anything to talk about.And with that i say anything i say will be misqouted and can be and will be used against me in the near future. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Reality Check Posted April 19, 2003 I have never been cheated on ..to my knowledge. BUT...I don't believe in forgive and forget...trust, if a man cheats on me, I vow under no circumstance to go back to him. That's sick..and I'm not about to hate on women who have gone back to their unfaithful husbands but I do wish that my friends stop me in my moment of weakness! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A7LA-SHU Posted April 19, 2003 hahahaha SCORPION_SISTA u wacko. did u even had to check her avator... lovely me. i don't even think i can answer any of those q coz haven't been there yet and god willin i won't.. but i just wanna to tell ya about the forgivin part. girl if god is forgivin i don't see why us human gotta be that bad. im not saying forgive him and go back to him.. but forgive n forget the world is only two days. n move on sweety.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites