biG mOm Posted April 26, 2003 My dearest Husband, Here are a few tips on how to be a successful Muslim Husband! May Allah Ta’ala give you the wisdom to understand the difference. Whatever truth is in it, is from Allah and His messenger (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wa Sallam) and whatever mistakes are from the Shaytaan and you. So to be a successful husband here are the tips from your wife. Dress up for your wife. Look clean and smell good. When was the last time you went shopping for designer pajamas? Just like you want me to look nice for you, I also want you to dress up for me. Remember that Rasullullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wa Sallam) would always start with Miswaak when returning home and always loved the sweetest smell. High time you should use the cutest names for your wife. Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wa Sallam) had nicknames for his wives, ones that they loved. Call your wife by the most beloved names to her and avoid using names that hurt her feelings. Don’t treat her like a fly - You never think about a fly in your daily lives until it "bugs" you. Similarly, I will do well all day - which brings no attention from you - until I do something to "bug" you. Don’t treat me like this, recognise all the good I do for you and focus on that. If you see wrong from your wife, try being silent and do not comment. This is one of the ways Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wa Sallam) used when he would see something inappropriate from his wives (Radiallaahu Anhum) It is a technique that you as a Muslim have to master. When last did you smile at me, can you remember? So smile, smile at your wife whenever you see her and embrace her often. Smiling is Sadaqah and your wife is not exempt from the Muslim Ummah. Imagine life with me constantly seeing you smiling. Remember also those ahadith when Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wa Sallam) would kiss his wife before leaving for salaah, even if he was fasting. You must thank me for all the things I do for you. Then you must thank me again! Take for example a dinner at home. I make the food, clean the home, and carry out a dozen other tasks. And sometimes the only acknowledgement I receive is that there needed to be more salt in the food. Don’t let that be. Thank me! Salt is always on the table for you to use. Ask me to write down the last ten things you did for me that made me happy. Then you must go and do them again. It may be hard to recognise what gives your wife pleasure. You don’t have to play a guessing game, ask her and work on repeating those times in your life. Don’t belittle my desires, comfort me. Sometimes you may look down upon the requests of your wife . Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wa Sallam) set the example for all in an incident when Safiyah (Radiallaahu Anha) was crying because, as she said, he had put her on a slow camel. He wiped her tears, comforted her and brought her the camel. Be humorous and play games with your wife, you are never too old to do anything, it’s the way we think. Look at how Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wa Sallam) would race his wife Aisha (Radiallaahu Anha) in the desert. When was the last time we did something like that? You are all busy in the bakery from Monday to Sunday and have no time for me. If I say (sic) you let’s walk on the beach you say "No!". That is not right. You are getting old before your time. Life is very short so enjoy your life while you can enjoy. Always remember the words of Allah’s Messenger (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wa Sallam) "The best of you are those who treat their wives the best." - Try to be the best! In Conclusion Never forget to make Dua to Allah -azza-wa-jall to make your marriage successful. And Allah Ta’ala Knows Best. I hope you read this letter very, very carefully and remember and practise what is written in it. (The Poem) I love filling your life with joy And your pain, I’ll alleviate it. But just a simple "thank you" would also show how much you appreciated me. As alamu alaykum From your loving wife, BiG mOm Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mizz-HurriCane Posted April 26, 2003 Mashallah jazaak allahuma kheyran jazaa.. I hope your kazbend will read this one .. aight then fi Amaan allah Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ProudSista Posted April 27, 2003 HurriCane : loooooooool @ kazbend that's a good one:D I hope he does, and may it fill his heart with joy and love for you MOM! Much love i'm out! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sweet_gal Posted April 27, 2003 I wish Somali men knew how to follow these simple rules.......I aint married but I doubt their are guys who play with their wife ( they probably think playing around is calling her names). Follow it, for ur own goods. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BoYz_at_lovezone Posted April 28, 2003 walahi this was a good mo7adaro(lucture). jazaka lahu khayran yaa mama. loooooooool@ kazband. why no tips for how a wife would please her kazband(husband). mama plz tell to our sisters sitting her with us some good ways to please their kazbands. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NoVa Posted April 28, 2003 Only real man' would do that for their wifey'...now boys' take some notes...it's for ur own good..lol Big moma' thanks for trying to enlight the brotha's.....some of them need it lol *SIsta Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Batuulo Posted April 29, 2003 wow! big mom .. this is what I call Love Letter.. big mom- I'm sure this w'll work for you. Love It. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
biG mOm Posted April 30, 2003 loool mizz- my kesban is happy know ty and thnk you all.. to your respect. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
muslim sis Posted May 8, 2003 you are so wonderfull mom I appreciated. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites