Doctor Dilemma

[Shakti]

Originally posted by Reality Check::

 

Oh you mean kind of like preserving a dying race, right? :rolleyes: [/QB]

Haa wallahi, u know We currently make-up 13% of the world population.. and here is Janna trying to reduce us.. Damn u Janna

[Rose]

To my understanding... her dilema is: how do you politely turn someone down who is trying to become closer to the deen?

[Che -Guevara]

^^^Try again Rose

[Shakti]

Rose, Janna doesnt have Dilemma but Drama for us:D

 

me have my popcorn ready

[nemo]

Originally posted by Reality Check:

1) Just because he doesn't pray 5 times a day does not make him a muslim by name..that is for Allah to judge

Doesn't the religion say PRAYER is what distinct you from the non-Believers.

[Reality Check]

Originally posted by nameless_chick:

quote:Originally posted by Reality Check:

1) Just because he doesn't pray 5 times a day does not make him a muslim by name..that is for Allah to judge

Doesn't the religion say PRAYER is what distinct you from the non-Believers.

That's comes from the sunnah. But noone in this world can judge who is and isnt muslim. The ultimate judge is GOD.

[LayZie G.]

am not interested in him. Nor do I find him attractive.

Don't get me wrong, but I think you are full of it.(hence, he doesn't pray 5x a day)

 

You know you are interested in his "status", and yes you find his "status" attractive, or else you wouldn't talk like you torn between his less attractive self and the potential of being the doctor's wife.

 

Sweetie, deep down you are what I call a silent gold digger, the thought of you giving up a potential hubby doctor is killing you silently, and thats your dilemma. Nothing more, nothing less.

 

If you weren't attracted to his so called "wealth" or u weren't interested in him in anyway, why have you not told him of this sooner?

 

Why did you lead him on?

 

The man had to have gotten to know you first before the marriage talk came about, unless this was arranged the old fashion way, and you two have managed to skip the shukaansi process.

 

YOu had so many chances to turn him down, but instead you led him on and on. For instance,when he asked for your digits, or the time he said he wanted to know you or that other time when he expressed his feelings for you, or better yet, that time when he proposed, or after the fact? You had so many chances to tell him you weren't interested, and you didn't.

 

Please don't come back here with BS anymore, we have worse shit to deal with, like everyday stress, but you created yours, and now you torn, I say marry him, you know you want to.

 

PS: Nothing wrong marrying outside of your people. Dating outside of your people is very therapeutic, and I encourage for everyone to try.

[Miriam1]

^looooool. that was gold.(no pun intended) walahi you should go into comedy and drop whatever feild ur in now.

[Mirage]

Originally posted by Reality Check:

quote:Originally posted by nameless_chick:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Reality Check:

1) Just because he doesn't pray 5 times a day does not make him a muslim by name..that is for Allah to judge

Doesn't the religion say PRAYER is what distinct you from the non-Believers.

That's comes from the sunnah. But noone in this world can judge who is and isnt muslim. The ultimate judge is GOD.

No-one can judge true. Anyone that declares there is no God but Allah and he alone is worthy of worship and Muhammed (pbuh) his messanger is considered to be a muslim , or rather thats the definition of a muslim. And as a muslim one must establish the five pillars of Islam. But Allah will decide your final resting place.

[TenaciousSoul]

Originally posted by Janna:

Somaliaonline members and silent readers, I am facing a major dilemma in my life. There is a doctor who I have met recently, who is a non-somali. Knowing the doctor less then a month, he proposed. I refused his proposal. I politely declined his proposal because he is a Muslim by name. He does not pray on regular bases however wishes to change. He is continuously mentions his wealth and the life I could have, if I accept his proposal. Marrying for wealth never appealed to me. I imagine myself marrying a practicing Muslim who is a Somali. I am not interested in him. Nor do I find him attractive. Without turning someone who wants to increase their iman away, how do I turn him down and encourage him to become a better Muslim?

 

Somaliaonline female members, would any of you consider a Non-Somali who is a doctor and wealthy? Who would marry for money?

a dr proposes less than a month..something doesnt add up here :confused:

 

marry him and take him to somali, im sure in less than a month he'll become muslim by action. My blessing are with you :cool:

[Aaliyyah]

Asalaamu Alaikum,

 

Jenna sis I would by no means advice you to get married to him because he is wealthy. Since wealth can fade away, what if tomorrow for whatever reason he loses his wealth? Then what happens you get yr divorce? :confused: You don’t need to base your whole future on wealth that should be something to overlook. There are more important aspects in life than money, as Allah subhanuhu wa tacaala will bless us with his prosperity.

 

You pointed out walaal that you are not interested in this brother and that you are not the least attracted to him. So, what you can do is simply tell him that you are not interested in him, and u dont c this relationship developing further than it is. As you know it is better to be straightforward, as you are not doing any favor for him by misguiding him and pretending you care. The other thing I would like to reconsider if I was you is are you truly sure you are not interested, because it seems to me you are looking for a religious brother and as this brother said he wants to change to a better Muslim. Perhaps, you need to give him more time, and within time you will be fond of him.

 

All that been said I would never advice my own Somali sister to marry outside her race. Think about your children, they will be lost between two cultures. Somalis have hard time teaching Somali kids their culture; imagine when your child is half Somali. Besides that your child will go through identity crises (imagine being half white, wouldn’t you wish to belong to one race. Being half/half isn’t fun). So find yourself a Somali brother one that is educated and can support himself and his family. Wealth should be the last thing to look in a spouse. Personally speaking my priorities are religion, educattion, personality, and culture.

 

Good luck sister, if allah wills you will find your calaf!!

wa salaamu alaikum

[Che -Guevara]

But noone in this world can judge who is and isnt muslim. The ultimate judge is GOD.

Everybody judges everybody based on their actions and appearance. Any who says they don't judge others is just deluding themselves.

[Janna]

Originally posted by Naden:

I don't get it, you're not interested in him, don't find him attractive, think he's a no-good muslim, and yet this is a MAJOR dilemma in your life?

How can it not be a major problem when the guy owns properties worth five million?

[sheherazade]

^LoL, umhm, got it but how much are you worth to him that he's luring you with the bling-bling?

 

Tell the Doc you have needy family back in the Horn, ask that he builds a hospital, a school and mosque and lives amongst them for 12 months healing them with his skill and learning of the culture and language in the process. If that doesn't take care of his Imaan nothing will. Be warned though, on his return from such an experience he may not be want to marry a woman attracted by money.

 

So there's your dilemma, his Imaan or your love of wealth.

[Aaliyyah]

Jenna you said sis "How can it not be a major problem when the guy owns properties worth five million?". Subhanalaah so you are into him because of money?. sister if you marry him for money, your marriage will not last? count on that. You either care about him or dont? and if u dont den let him move on.

 

wa salaaaaaaaam