Ibtisam Posted April 9, 2008 Apparently I did not get the memo, I hear it was sent out to everyone girl who finished college in the African community. It specifically stated that you cannot have your cake (higher education) and still eat (good husband &kids) In addition it stated that educated men should only marry women who are educated up to college level, however their ar elimited few who may be able to deal with a university drop out, providing she dropped out after the first year courtesy of getting really bad grades. Various reasons were sited for this; including and mainly centred around the idea that women cannot handle being educated, they use their status in every argument, they get big headed, they are too independent and thing they can tussle with their husband for control. My favourite reason was that she asks “WHY” too often, offering her own suggestions or alternative ways of doing things. ALL this annoyed the educated men to no end, they have earned their place as the head of household, he is the boss, he has a lot going for him, the ultimate catch, he can do this all on his own, and he does not want help or suggestions or try alternative ways. He does not want his authority challenged, his ego damaged, his status questioned. So the educated man said, No to educated women, find me a college drop out. There was a tick box on the memo, make your choice ladies, catch your ultimate catch, or catch a book. The choice is yours. It is bad enough I missed the first memo, no one bothered to send me the second memo either! But I hear the second one offered tips and advised to the hard-headed African women who decided education was their path. The first advice was more like a warning… Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jacaylbaro Posted April 9, 2008 I think the topic is years and years way back but why blame only Africans ??? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted April 9, 2008 It was my African lecture who started the conversation a while ago, so I started asking around, only to find he was not joking or making things up! lol Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jacaylbaro Posted April 9, 2008 I still think it is a joke ,, Again we cannot talk about the WHOLE Africa as it is a big continent .... some parts can be different from the rest and it varies when it comes to the culture and religion. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted April 9, 2008 Okay narrow it down to the Somali community. It is a problem. I will tell you a story that happened to me. Some family sponsored dude had the same attitude, apparently they neglected to mention I was still a student. Let’s just say his sponsorship expired pretty fast. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jacaylbaro Posted April 9, 2008 Yes, there are caes ,,thousands of cases but still cannot represent Africa as a whole. and i don't think Africa is now the Africa we used to know/hear anymore ,,,, people advanced and see how they're running after the girl who comes back from US/Europe when she is back home or try to visit. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Geel_jire Posted April 9, 2008 compared to other cultures I think Somali women are treated with much more respect and are raised in a way that while she is respectful towards her husband but will not take any BS from him at all. a Somali woman might be divorced with a few kids but that in now way damages her prospects for a new marriage whereas in southeast Asia a single mother has no prospects and is regarded with shame. I personally do not recall seeing a meek halimo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
underdog Posted April 9, 2008 I fail to see the correlation between 'compatibility' and 'education'. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Faheema. Posted April 9, 2008 Such memo does not exist...it's all a falsehood created by those women who feel they must blame someone. Men are not the problem, nor is a man the answer to all your problems. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
underdog Posted April 9, 2008 ^^^^ Someone get this girl a medal. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zafir Posted April 9, 2008 Pravo Faheema. Off topic. UD, Dude, I have been meaning to tell you that I have finally purchased George Forman’s grill, it’s the most excellent investment I have made since my electrical drill. I Love the damn thing so bloody much it’s becoming unbearable, wooohoo! I am getting excited just thinking about it and I have even boycotted bariis and baasto because they are ungrillable. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted April 9, 2008 Loool!^^ Underdog: Why don't you give her one. Faheema, I would agree to a certain extent, but I think their are certain insecurities that emerge. As for the memo, it exist, believe you me. It is in the attitude. e.g. Why could it not be your brother who was going to higher education, or don't stress yourself too much, this won't take you far. etc. I can give tons of examples. Underdog, education changes mind, attitudes and perspectives in life. It will affect your compatibility. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Faheema. Posted April 9, 2008 lol@Zafir, kadaa. Ibs Yes, there are insecure men, as much as there are (if not more) insecure woman and you cannot generalise because of few. Yes, education does have some impact, but I have seen woman who have never been inside a classroom yet who are smarter than those who claim to be 'educated'. Personality and compatibility is what counts at the end of the day. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Caano Geel Posted April 9, 2008 ^^ i told you not go around reading things! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zafir Posted April 9, 2008 Originally posted by Ibtisam: Underdog, education changes mind, attitudes and perspectives in life. It will affect your compatibility. Education shows the mind different attitudes and perspectives in life. Hence, it only effects your companionabilty to your suiting, if you were a knucklehead before education there is a good chance you might remain a knucklehead after. *speaking for both genders* Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites