Motherhood-Is it becoming a Hobby for 21st centur mothers?

[Khayr]

Moms should stay home

By Michael Correenn

 

 

The presidenttt of Harvvard Unniversity, Lawrrrence Summmers, announced this week that he will resign from his position at the end of this academic year. This became almost inevitable after he made a speech last winter claiming "innate differences" between the sexes may well explain why more men succeed in math and sciences than do women.

 

Not the most radical statement in history, perhaps, but bold enough to make him a hated figure on campuses and a punching bag for radical feminists.

 

I don't really know if there is a different aptitude for science between men and women and don't particularly care. I do know, however, that a woman's place is in the home.

 

There, it's been said. The unthinkable has been uttered. I can only wonder what the various highly intelligent women who edit my column are saying as they read this, but that's hardly the point. A woman's place is in the home.

 

No, not every woman and not every home. But one major reason society has lost much of its stability, grace and decorum is because so many women with children have been urged to flee the "incarceration" of the family for the "freedom" of the office.

 

Obviously there are many women who are not mothers to whom this does not apply and also many mothers who are obliged to find employment so as keep the family together. The objection here is to the knee-jerk assumption that somehow it is natural and admirable for women to be in the paid workforce.

 

There is no compelling case that the world would be a better place if more women were lawyers, bankers, soldiers or engineers. There are many such arguments, however, that the world would be a far better place if more women were mothers. Which means more than the mere act of procreation. It means devotion, sacrifice and time. Not quality time, just time. Lots of it. It means refusing to accept that self-esteem can only come through a boss, water cooler gossip and a generous pension scheme.

 

Yes, of course, fathers are a vital part of any family and most of the gun violence in our cities has far more to do with absence of dads than the presence of guns. But a mother is unique and irreplaceable.

 

Nobody is forcing women to become moms, but if they do they should take their new job seriously and not pretend it is some hobby or part-time occupation. Instead, we have created a situation where many women are embarrassed to admit that they are at home with their kids.

 

Recently, a Tory MP told me, in a spasm of political correctness, that Canada needed more women in Parliament.

I asked him why, and he reacted as if he'd never been asked the question before. Which, of course, he probably hadn't.

 

I continued: "Could it be argued that raising a child to be a respectful, intelligent, moral and good person is just slightly more important than sitting in a building in Ottawa and obeying the orders of some second-rate prime ministerial assistant?"

 

He called me an ***** . Which may be true, but it does not obscure the point: We've declared war on motherhood in the name of a better, healthier society and declared war on family in the name of women's liberty.

 

So the president of Harvard feels he has to resign because he dared to raise an interesting question. We can only wonder what his mom would have said. Chances are that it would have been something wonderful. Mothers are like that.

Source

 

Motherhood-A hobby?

 

Nomads, do you agree with the writer of this article.

[Naden]

You posted the article, what is your opinion?

 

Their arguments are a bore. These motherhood-nazis appear forthnightly and ignore the economic necessity of the work that women do (not to mention the personal and intellectual freedom that they are entitled to). Women work in every corner of the world. What he is truly advocating is their return to unpaid farming, social and child/old/infirm tending they've been doing. He's not the only one pushing this drivel. :rolleyes: .

 

The old school argument of women vs. men in the sciences brought up by the unfortunate ex-Harvard president is another issue that has little to do with the issue of women in paid work.

[-Lily-]

Most women who decide to have children will be housewifes at some point or another in their life, that doesn't mean their entire life. I don't agree with the way it has been presented in this article but there is nothing shocking behind the idea that children need their mothers. And it's not like all the women in the entire population will be all working at one point.

 

What really annoys me is when women who are housewifes (or domestic engineers as the politically correct word is)are made to feel like they do nothing and watch daytime tv all day. It's a more important and complicated job than anything else. Anyway, who made man the standard? Women shouldn't have to act like men to get the respect they deserve. Every woman will need to decide for herself what is her pirority.

[Khayr]

Originally posted by WaTerLily:

Most women who decide to have children will be housewifes at some point or another in their life, that doesn't mean their entire life. I don't agree with the way it has been presented in this article but there is nothing shocking behind the idea that children need their mothers. And it's not like all the women in the entire population will be all working at one point.

 

What really annoys me is when women who are housewifes (or domestic engineers as the politically correct word is)are made to feel like they do nothing and watch daytime tv all day. It's a more important and complicated job than anything else.

Anyway, who made man the standard? Women shouldn't have to act like men to get the respect they deserve. Every woman will need to decide for herself what is her pirority.

[Blessed]

I agree with Waterlily.

 

On stay at home moms, has anybody noticed how many Somali women treat their children as a burden, it's really sad. When I was having my baby all they did was tell me about the nightmares and a list of all the sacrifices you must make. I was like nadhaafa, miserable lot!

[Resistance]

Say you were the leader of a team that had to complete a major project, how will you orginse the team .. is natural that you will divide the team so each person concentrates on the area that they are strongest at. Well the same formula applies applies to soceity ... Allah knows best and it is Allah has clearly defined the role of man and that of a women in this world .. ...

 

is just society these days is defeating itself .. as Waterlily has said above socety has has placed an impportance on the tasks that are traditionally male led ... and completly down played the importance of a mother in any family ... the mother is the bearer of child, it educates, cares for, and most of all will love it no matter what .. and that is why in Islam the Mother comes 1st,the Mother 2nd and the Mother 3rd ..

 

so to all my muslims sisters say aamin Allah had made u a women, a mother, a duaghter, a sister, a wife and with it comes with great reponsibilty and much love ... ingnore the the thaughts and thinking of so-called femminist for you are the standarad bearer of thus Ummah.

 

and theres one saying i strongly agree with: 'for great man there is an even greater women behind'

 

wasalaam

[Khayr]

Originally posted by Blessed:

I agree with Waterlily.

 

On stay at home moms, has anybody noticed how many Somali women treat their children as a burden, it's really sad. When I was having my baby all they did was tell me about the nightmares and a list of all the sacrifices you must make. I was like nadhaafa, miserable lot!

Salamad,

 

I can sypmathize with you on that point as I have found folks at work look at me with Bewilderment "What- she is a housewife? You oppressor...poor women....." is what I would imgaine would be in their heads, judging from their facial expression.

I agree with the article, Motherhood has become a Hobby for alot of people.

[Guhaad]

I found this passage to be interesting,

 

There is no compelling case that the world would be a better place if more women were lawyers, bankers, soldiers or engineers.

There are many such arguments, however, that the world would be a far better place if more women were mothers

. Which means more than the mere act of procreation. It means devotion, sacrifice and time. Not quality time, just time. Lots of it. It means refusing to accept that self-esteem can only come through a boss, water cooler gossip and a generous pension scheme.

and confusing. does anyone know any of those many arguments that support that bold sentence. is it that if more women were mothers and happy with it, say, children will be less likely to be gansters, troublemakers?

 

i ask this because all i have heard and continue to hear is the positive things about getting Moms from the 'xaafad' to the workplace, schools, etc. so that they become more indepedent from men. i haven't heard anything the other direction scientifically.

[-Lily-]

It does go both ways, being a father is not limited to providing a pay check at the end of each week/month.

 

Blessed, I can see where you are coming from but I think it's equally dangerous to galamourize motherhood as the hight of happiness. It helps to know what you are getting yourself into and not be just seduced by cute chubbied babies.It's all about balance as with everything else in life. With a lot of patience and support, mothers can (that dreaded phrase) have it all. Like I said a certain period of being a housewife cannot be avoided but that is not to say that women cannot contribute to science, technology, education and everything else outisde the home that concerns both parties of the human race.

[Alle-ubaahne]

A front page article in New York Times was covered yesterday in this issue of women choosing staying home over working and challengin with men in all tasks. This looks a natural flight back to the previous position of womanhood.

 

Let's see the reaction of our westernized girls who think emulating western ladies suffices life in its totality.

[Naden]

Huh? :rolleyes: Explain, don't taunt.

 

Originally posted by Alle-ubaahne:

Let's see the reaction of our westernized girls who think emulating western ladies suffices life in its totality.

[Guhaad]

^^Alle-u-baahne, why ask?

 

they will change again, in democracy, the majority rules :cool:

[Blessed]

WaterLily

I didn’t disagree with any of your comments walaal, including the part about the necessity of women in the work place. My comment was a digression of the work-home argument- I’ve always maintained that’s it’s dependent on individual circumstances.

 

As for finding children burdensome, I find that those feelings are common amongst traditional Somali women. From, my observations, Somalis though they have many children aren’t very child friendly. Intaa wey ka cabonayaan about the sacrifices that they make for their children, their always ranting and raving about parental rights but pay little attention to that of the child. Honest to Allah, they depress me.

 

It’s true, it is hard work and biggest challenge of this life, but how do we expect paradise to be at our feet if we aren’t patient with the trials, which are really nothing in comparison to the rewards of parenting.

 

Khayr

 

It doesn't matter what others think, as long as you and yours are both happy with it.

 

There are also many women in the ME and Somalia who sit at home and gossip all day, whilst the maid, ayeeyo, eedo or older children play mother and bring up the children.

 

You also need to understand, that many women don’t really have an ‘option’ in the matter. My Arab neighbor, a teacher has had a baby 3 months ago and she’s already back in work. Does she want to go to work? No! Does she need to go to work? And are she and other women like her contributing positively to society? Yes! Yes! It’s easy to criticize the women, when governments create systems that make it impossible for families to live on one income.

 

Alle Ubahne

 

You’re a Joker walahi. I dare you go to the Markets of Hargaisa and Muqdishu and tell the women there to go home and wait on their useless qaad-daaqers of husbands, fathers, and brothers. daaq on this! :rolleyes:

[Zafir]

Maasha allaah Blessed.

[LayZie G.]

As for finding children burdensome, I find that those feelings are common amongst traditional Somali women. From, my observations, Somalis though they have many children aren’t very child friendly. Intaa wey ka cabonayaan about the sacrifices that they make for their children, their always ranting and raving about parental rights but pay little attention to that of the child. Honest to Allah, they depress me.

Blessed, I whole heartily agree with you. A large number of Somali mothers do find their children a burden, but who can blame them?

 

3 or 4 children, only 1 year and half apart, no support from the useless husband/father. He won't even lift a finger to help her around with the children, forget the household chorus.

 

We wonder why these mothers are so bitter towards their children? They are angry, they feel like slaves and most importantly all that hate feeling she has towards the no good farah is taken upon the child/children, since he isn't home for her to hate on him, she will hate on the next person, and that is the child.

 

Getting back to the poster and his perfect little world. It doesn't surprise me that you would agree with Women finding motherhood a hobby nowadays, everyone knew that was coming. How you can still exist in society just shocks me.

 

Really, you are not even funny anymore.

 

Let’s say some women might actually find motherhood a hobby, what is wrong with having hobbies, and especially a child as a hobby? Atleast women won't run out on their children, hobby or not.

 

Women will always stick by that child, whether she wants to or not, where is the man? Where are the Farahs? Thousands of miles away, pretending to be single and courting other females so he can make more women bitter? What does a man bring to the table? Absolutely nothing. They can't even get a decent paying job nowadays, therefore that whole saying of MEN BEING "BREAD WINNERS" is out of the door.

 

All I am saying is, a woman is everything to a man, where as the man is nothing to a woman. All of you men out there, you have atleast one woman in your life in the following categories. A mother, A wife, A sister, An aunt, A grandmother.

 

If any of those above choose to find motherhood as a hobby, that’s their prerogative

 

 

PS:Much love to the mothers who love being with their children, happy and willing to sacrifice, if that means no life outside of the child, much respect 2 you for making that decision. I just wish I can say the same about the fathers.