Who needs government more? Men or Women?

[safiabdi]

Assalaamu alaikum!

 

Seeing how Somali women had suffered following the destruction of their nation, I honestly believed, to function at all, a woman needed stability and governance more than her male counterpart. Fourteen years of instability have proved me wrong. Going by the sheer strength Somali women displayed as they struggled to keep the family together, fed the household and devoted themselves to their kith and kin have shown the world that the Somali woman is a much stronger person today. She proved her mettle that she can stand her ground and take care of her own, with or without government.

 

Unfortunately, her male counterpart veered towards a less admirable tendency. With the break-up of the Somali nation, we saw Somali men buckle under the pressure. While women proved to the world they can survive by being gentle and co-operative, the men seem to thrive on the opposite. It’s as though they get a kick out of destroying themselves.

 

Except for the few actors on stage, the Somali conflict has reduced the bulk of Somali men into pathetic bystanders; sitting on the side lines and blaming everyone else but themselves. There is a lack of confidence all around and even though they speak the same language, share the same culture there is a complete breakdown of communication. It is apparent from the way they jump at each other’s throats that the conflict has not spared even their sense of humor. This is a bizarre Somali phenomenon and is not confined to any one single clan. All the tribes are suffering from this complex. And the sooner the Somali male looked at himself in the mirror the better for the Somali nation; and the quicker he re-joined the world scene.

 

While women kept busy nurturing the family, going about their business quietly, the men excelled each other in killing their time. Like tribalism and guns, Qaat has taken its toll on the psyche of Somali men. Prior to our nation’s total collapse, Qaat was limited to certain individuals and areas, the aftermath of the civil war has brought with it a dramatic rise in the consumption of this narcotic plant. Time, wealth, dignity, now all is lost to Qaat. Somalis used to pride themselves on their good looks, thanks to Qaat, that too seems to have disappeared from our men. Like all drug users these people have neither the time nor the inclination to look good. This is a serious social problem and one which is just as bad as the guns, as it feeds on and adds to the present situation of helplessness and anarchy. Muslims are supposed to make good use of their time and they should look good and be well-kept at all times. Teeth, hair, cloth, body, nails, every part of the Muslim human body are important. Qaat spoils the body as much as it spoils the brain. A brainless person with a wasting body is a walking dead. By using Qaat as a means of escape (from problems they should be solving) Somali men are killing their conscience and dulling their brains.

 

While Somali women’s hair turned gray from worry and anxiety due to their country’s situation, Somali men seem like they’re enjoying life to the full. They crowd tea houses, coffee places, or wherever they can put feet…The word is out that UAE government is keeping a close eye on Somali men’s gatherings in the Dubai Souq area. Our men have created colonies of human pyramids in the narrow streets standing in threes or fours talking themselves hoarse. Their loud voices can be heard fifty meters away. They’ve also this funny habit of staring at women shoppers; a rather un-Islamic thing to do. Muslim men are supposed to lower their voices and gaze. Telling these guys to stay home with their wives and children is like telling Sharon to stop building on stolen land. Some of these guys can’t even tell who is who of their flesh and blood. But you will bet they know the names of each and every clansman and Qaat buddy.

 

Even though they are responsible for the anarchy and desolation that engulfed our nation, Somali men are still wandering in mind. They can't understand that they are men and that a whole nation is waiting for their return. It is therefore in their best interest to come down to earth and pray for and be part of a viable State where all Somalis should enjoy freedom and healthy living. Somali men need guidance and skills to survive in the real world, and they won’t get that until they returned to Allah, laid down their arms and picked up books. As it is, life in Somalia is a nightmare for most people today, thanks to our men. Men need to get off the street, go back to work, sit in classrooms and do what normal men should be doing for their nation and families.

 

The problem we Somalis have isn’t just the warlords, majority of Somali men are a part and parcel of that beautiful land’s demise. Should men not brighten up soon Somali women might just give up on them. As it is, the women have developed a mechanism for survival and they have the strength to sustain it. The great need Somali men have for governance can not be exaggerated.

[Warmoog]

Although I agree that the conditions fostered by the nature of our patriarchal, clan-based society and our nation’s statelessness have coupled to create imbalances which weigh heavily towards the suffering of females, it does not necessarily mean that suffering will cease as soon as 'Somali men get their act together'. Families might see a reduction in domestic problems whose causations are Qaat-related, but women and their issues would still remain an afterthought in social and political discourse. I think that dilemma calls for other remedies, which have more to with mobilizing women for their own causes… as opposed to waiting around for the men and whatever handoffs they may or may not offer, if or when they spring into action.

 

P.S. – I completely agree with your views on Qaat. I wish more people saw it for what it really is (i.e. a drug). I recently listened to the broadcast of a lecture by Sheikh Mustafe Ismaciil X. Haarun. He likened Somalia’s Qaat problem to China’s Opium War of the 19th Century… it was interesting.

[Blessed]

^^^lol@ God sent. Masakiin :rolleyes:

 

 

 

 

Interesting analyses Safi,

 

I don't have much time to go into this. But the state of our men is depressing. I really miss the days when our brothers exhumed raganimo in their every stride, every word and move.

 

We now have a situation where the majority of our men are just wasting away. We have to many brother in jail, too many on drugs, too many with mental health conditions and too many wasting their days either staring at / cursing at their sisters.

 

 

I'm wondering whether we need to change certain aspects of our dhaqan to ensure that our younger brothers don't follow the footsteps of their 'role models'.

 

 

It's scary walahi! We need a solution and we need it fast....

[safiabdi]

Men account for half of Somali society, a society that as Yasmine pointed out is patriarchal in nature…even though that idea could no longer be said to hold much water, due to the facts on the ground where women are left to juggle both roles.

 

I do agree with Yasmine that women should not wait around for men to see the light, and I for one don’t think they were given the luxury to do that. But for women to be mobilized in any effective way they need to be relieved of the heavy burden of carrying men’s share of the load. So the good question is: when are we going to see signs of maturity on the part of our men or are Somali women going to be forever doomed to a land of women only, where men are no longer "men" in the true sense of the word?

This is serious dilemma facing the Somali nation and I would like to see men’s reaction. If what I cited in the write is not true, then let them prove me wrong. If true, then let’s discuss ways and means of improving the situation; before we create more Ayaans...

 

Ameenah, Yasmine, look forward to seeing you again on this. Would also like to know if you know of any Somali women groups. Thank you! Please visit me on my website:

http://www/authorsden.com/safiabdi

 

Safi

[Warmoog]

Safi,

I know don't of any Somali women's associations in this country, but I did a little search online and here are some of the organizations/agencies that come up:

 

Horn of Africa Women's Organization - Ottawa

Ottawa Somali Women's Organization (OSWO) - Ottawa

Somali Canadian Women’s Developmental Organization - (?)

Somali Centre for Youth, Women, and Community Development - Ottawa

Somali Women's Organization - Toronto

Somaliland Women's Organization - Toronto

 

I came across the names of many others that weren't concerned exclusively with women, many of which where based in Ottawa (the capital). There's another association called Midaynta here in Toronto. It's an umbrella group under which numerous local Somali agencies (eg. Somali Women's Organization) are grouped.

[safiabdi]

Yasmine,

Thanks for the feedback. This is a promising grassroots development for the Somali nation.

I've pasted down below part of an interesting article that appeared in a local English newspaper here in the UAE.

 

Excerpt (Khaleej Times)

 

Somalis make their mark in the UAE

By Afkar Ali Abdulla

 

DUBAI - The Somali community has been making their presence felt in the UAE over the last five years in the backdrop of the rapid growth of their businesses in the country, in general, and Dubai in particular. In Dubai, Somalis operate more than 30 gold and textile shops, hotels, computer businesses, money exchanges and livestock imports...

 

Backbone

 

Somali women have always been the backbone of Somali society. In the UAE, 30 per cent of the Somali men's income is not enough to make ends meet, and in view of that the women chip in to help their husbands in supporting the family. "The business prospects in Dubai are relatively high and it gives us a chance to earn a decent living and recover from the suffering that we have gone through in our homeland, which was dubbed as the land of sorrow," Qamar said.

 

Aisha Geddi, owner of another textile shop, said that Somali women running their businesses was a common sight. "Somali women have gone through great difficulties in their home country - they faced starvation, humiliation and torture. These sufferings made them very strong and independent," Aisha said, adding that many women sold out their properties and made a beeline for UAE in order to generate more money and lead peaceful and secured lives. "We are trying to make our life better," she said.

 

Sacida Hassan Mohammad, owner of gold jewellery outlet, was all praise for Dubai. "I have lived half of my life here, my children grew up here and we consider this place as our second home."

 

Amna Osman, owner of a Typing Centre, said that since the civil war broke out in Somalia in 1991, the common citizens have gone through total destruction on the social and economic fronts. Those who were affected most were women and children.

 

The absence of basic rights for women, particularly in political field and decision-making process, remains a major impediment. "Today Somali women in UAE are not only running business to make money but also are working towards bringing a positive change to Somalia."

 

Full article:

 

http://www.khaleejtimes.com/Displayarticle.asp?section=theuae&xfile=data/theuae/2003/august/theuae_august31.xml

 

Ramadhan Kareem!

Safi

http://www.authorsden.com/safiabdi

http://www.mightycollision.com

[Warmoog]

I just came across an interesting article on Hiiraan Online. Four Somali community workers and activists – two of them from organizations mentioned in my last post – have been recognized for their achievements in Ottawa.

 

"The challenges we face are not often unique to us and we have to reject to be ghettoized in any way. There is nothing called “the Somali problemâ€. The challenges we face and the problems we encounter in Ottawa have nothing to do with our Somaliness."

The immigrants' struggle continues, but congrats to the honourees!

 

See the article here: Somali Women Receive Key to the City of Ottawa