jabarti Posted August 13, 2003 NOW THAT I AM BIT OLDER AND WISER By: Mr. X This story is about of my best friend, he is young and talented brother, he has creative skills, he write poems and produce drama plays, he is natural born leader. He doesn’t know that I am posting this article but what I will do is that I will not mention his real name since he doesn’t like his name to be mentioned here or anywhere else, but the story is true, its about his life, yesterday and today. I hope this story will help a lot of our young brothers and sisters who are going thru similar experience. Soomaalida waxay dhahdaa (geel laba jir soo wada mar) (rag labaatan jir buu ku balamay) etc… This story is exceptional one, it talks about a young Somali man who ran from his war turned country to find peace, education, hope and good future but found himself in a country where he know little about its culture, religion, weather, people and its system. He left behind his mother, sisters, brothers, and his father died in crossfire in Mogadishu. Without any further introduction here is the story told by Mr. X himself. Enjoy it… Jabarti. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Now that I am bit older and wiser, I've learned that life's tribulations that hit you like patches of dark night will only make you stronger. They say success is the journey, and what a journey I have been through. Born and raised in a small village in Somalia, I was a happy little kid with no problems and no worries. I use to dream of sitting on top of a mountain drinking milk and tea, having trees filled with fruits and flowers surrounding me, singing with birds and butterflies in beautiful harmony. But the big oak tree that I played under never told me the journey that lied ahead. The green grass, and the rhythmic pattern of the far away hills, and even the soothing feeling of a cool African night all told me lies of a life, they painted pretty and nice. In search of a better life and a vision of prosperity my family moved to Mogadishu. But like fire to propane hatred ignited a civil war that exploded in all directions. My journey has now taken its first steps, and even if I tried I couldn't stop it. With a blink of an eye my world was covered in darkness. Memories will not allow me to forget the day that I got lost and in my search my father died in the crossfire. My virgin eyes were not ready to see the sight of blood let alone my father's dead body. The journey has now turned bitter. I couldn't find my mother and my siblings. And my mind now and then on its own puts the image of my father in front of my eyes. And with each image I realize that taking his presence for granted was wrong, cause ever since the good Lord took him my nights became so long, days filled with laughter became so sad, and I can't seem to forget the good times that we had. Now I am on my own, pain rips at my heart with its claws trying to expose my soul. I scream out in anger, pain, and sorrow, but darkness chokes every ray of hope. My grief spills out upon the earth as endless as this journeys it self. I wandered the streets like a wild animal, eat other people's trash and slept in a battle zone. I survived by saluting those at night that band and loot. At this point if I had known the path my life Was heading towards I would have ended things a while ago; I hated waking up in the morning and prayed every night to remain asleep. So badly I craved to end the misery. If success was the journey, I'd rather not be successful at all. I was found by an organization for homeless children who set me up with a Somali family. They brought me over to Canada, and kicked me out my first year. They said I was grown and that it was time for me to take care of myself. Too many things in my life turned out to good to be true, every time something felt perfect things got in the way. I was all-alone again. But this time the journey throws me off a cliff and left me to die. I joined a gang for reasons you will never understand, and got addicted to drugs. I became violent and never really cared too much about anything as long as I had my knife by my side. I kept on playing a game in which the rules kept changing on me. I was in and out of jail with no goals or Ambitions. I went through a constant battle between good and bad and at the end of each day it seemed like evil had claimed another victory. You and I both know that sometimes you lose yourself in this world and your shadow deepens even more left only with endless distractions, intellectual dialogues that go nowhere and a suffocating reasoning of what is right and what is wrong. I was singing a sad song that nobody heard but me. And like a bird locked in a cage, I put on a fake smile so people wouldn't know the hell that I was living. My weak heart at times made it hard to breathe and my lost soul found comfort in sadness. It’s truly beyond me why I put myself in harms away again and again but at this point of the journey I was in too deep. I always felt however, that this life style was not my destiny and that I had one foot in greatness. I had a heart darkened by a journey but ready to love again. I read in a book once that said: " Love made a body of dust soar above the heavens, It even excited the mountains and they danced, The intense love of the beloved descended On the lover with same intoxicating influence That caused a man to fall down fainting." And in haste I forgot that this love requires growing. Instead sadness engulfed my heart and tears broke open like a dam, pouring out through channels I never knew existed. I cried a thousand tears but with each tear had a thousand wishes. And like a full moon in a clear night it finally dawns on me that things in my life had to change for my survival. Like my friend said, I was no longer going to let my life be subservient to street predicaments, my success was eminent. So I got up and dusted myself off. I found strength in my beliefs and inspiration in my father. My faith became strong like the pyramids and deep like the river Nile. And finally my anguished soul found the answers to its questions. The long journey has now come full circle, I went back to high school and graduated, and I'm getting married in two years with a year left in University. I work to support my mother and siblings whom I have found and are back home. I have come to the understanding that in life the hand you play is dealt to you by your creator, my better judgement opened up my heart and eradicated my sadness. Something deep in my soul tells me that I am going to make the right choices from now on. "For whom ever God (Allah) guides non can lead astray and whom ever God (Allah) leads astray non can guide." (Prayer) I have surrounded myself with righteous people who with a cacophony of voices whisper harmony and goodness into my soul. I found hope in prayer and all of a sudden I don't feel alone anymore. Never should I forget the actions that destroyed what my heart achieved or the images that covered what soul believed. I have hurdle over obstacles and ran through fear. I can now look the world in the eyes and say. "You may look at me with your evil eyes, you may manipulate me with your wicked lies but just like Mayo Angelo I still rise." I said: Now that I am bit older and wiser, I've learned that life's tribulations that hit you like patches of dark night will only make you stronger By. My best friend Mr. X Posted by. Jabarti [ September 02, 2003, 01:57 AM: Message edited by: Admin ] Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Xafsa Posted August 13, 2003 THat was the most profound article I have read thus far!!! That brotha has a way with words..it takes a truly strong person to change the course of his life. Masha alaah...I am truly happy for him!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Changed Posted August 13, 2003 it was a touching peace ...thanks for sharing it with us Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Macalin Posted August 13, 2003 Amazing! amazing Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ayaan8321 Posted August 13, 2003 that was very touching...it shows us that we take things for granted... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
La-y-La Posted August 14, 2003 ....thats nice. good 4 him, hope he continues on this path insha'allah. that kinda made me cry, cuz i realize there are a lot out there wit the same story, only they dont really get better like he did. illah kuligood ha ugargaaro!!! peace. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuCkY Posted August 14, 2003 Jabarti thanks for posting. That was some piece of work im gLad ALLah guided him to the right path and that he had the strength to continue over and over again with everything that he has encountered. May ALLah guide us ALLah to the right direction and for those that are going through things Likes this hope its not too Late for them. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
silent-sistah Posted August 14, 2003 MashaAllah...and Alhamdulillah things worked out for him! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hawdgirl Posted August 14, 2003 wow!and Awguuriyo to the bro for beating the odds! We all know that life'z journey is hard and has it'z ups and downs... but Alxamdulilah that the bro has made it through and finally got his life together... there are thousands of Somalis who went through the same experience....some overcome it while other go on through the dark tunnels...till they stand the position where we one could say there is "no where to run" or "in the middle of nowhere"... Might the sun always shine on him, meaning the bro....and congrats to him... Thanks bro Jabarti for sharing such a lovely and heart warming story with us... it is motivational...yet an inspiring story for all of us.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Moe Posted August 14, 2003 Thanks for posting this story that brother X. wrote. I wish we could all have the strengh of brother X. If only we all could come to the same conclusions he had...one can only wish. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MD Posted August 17, 2003 Maaashaallah WOW thanks for posting this jabarti, indeed an interesting article and well written! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Valenteenah. Posted August 18, 2003 That was a very poignant story. Mansha'Allah. Jabarti, may Allah bless your friend and lessen his burden and ours too. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Diaspora_Dude Posted August 21, 2003 One of it's kind...........Very interesting and appealing to our younger generation nowadays that are in Western societies.............. ** If published in newspapers the brother would receive a book deal it could be an auto biography.... so encourage the brother.. Peace Love & Unity Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Raxmah Posted September 24, 2003 wow mashallah. The brother has talent, may allah keep him on this path. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
