A qualititative debate on Beauty vs Brains

[Nefertiti]

Phrases such as ‘Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder’ and ‘Beauty is within’ are commonly used whether it is genuinely meant it or not. However, is one able to define beauty and doesn’t the term brainy actually depend on how well one is able to use the grey mass between the two cortex’s?

 

Would you form a relationship with someone purely based on looks, someone that you can’t have a conversation with, and listening to the barking of the old lady’s dog next door is more interesting—that being the high light of your time together. (You can even recognise the different types of barking a dog can produce, you reckon it is between 5 and 7 depending on the situation ). The only possible reason why you would put up with them is because you receive positive reinforcing comments about their appearance and all your peers are green with jealousy. "You would be out of your mind to dump him/her", is what you constantly hear when you complain to a friend about the lack of inspiration and interest in your relationship.

 

Of course above assumptions are over-simplified and things are never as they seem. But what is it that really attracts us to each other? Are beauty and brains co-dependant variables i.e. we need bit of both for a healthy relationship, or can beauty never be matched with brains? Can that gorgeous model-next-door make you laugh like the big teeth-big pimples individual can? Do you think that you could exchange stimulating conversation for the sound of a "dog barking", just for visual convenience and social acceptance?

 

So on that note, feel free to chip in and express your preference.

 

~QoxootiMammi~

 

‘I am the face, the voice, the key, and the global link for…La Familia Nomad’

 

-----QoxootiMammi ( )-----

[Akademik]

I would say, go with Brain over beauty..

 

 

But is fact that the average woman would rather

have beauty than brains, because the average man

can see better than he can think. lol..

 

 

Hero.

[Rising Phoenix]

This is a good question, actually.

 

To be truly honest, and side stepping the ethically right thing to say; the hard truth is that most (and I mean a big majority) judge people based on looks. There is no such thing as “Love at first sight” simply because what you feel at that moment is pure lust and sexual chemistry. “Love” comes much later—if at all—when both parties have gotten to know each other sufficiently enough to express their emotions in this way.

 

But to get back to the topic at hand, lets look at a common scenario; you are out having fun, letting your hair (or weave ) down,” in da club” getting your groove on, when suddenly a certain individual catches your attention. Now, this individual does not meet your usual physical requirements, but because he/she is so persistent you’re finally persuaded in giving your number out. Then after this individual has left, you see another that most certainly does meet your requirements. Now be honest, how long will it take you to smile, flash some abs, flutter your eyelashes, give out your number and whatnot? Not as long as before, right?

 

The truth is, when you meet someone who is not very good-looking (in your book) the comment that will most like slip out is “he/she is not my type” or “We’re just good friends.” Later on, you might start liking that person in a more-than-friends way, but at first that is not on the cards. Why? Because you judged them by looks.

Now I am not saying that this is everyone. In fact, personally, no matter how cute I find a gentleman, I still dont like him, until I get to know him. Consequently, the ones I like have always been friends anyway.

 

But then again, what is beauty anyway? It varies for everyone, and each person has his or her own personal tastes. But here I am talking about the Classic Model look, that Hollywood Beauty.

“Beauty” only matters for as long as you dont know a certain person very well. Lately, it seems that the more beautiful people are, the less nice they seem to be. It seems as if being beautiful is a Licence for Bytchy-ness that can also double as a Licence for Survival, as being beautiful seems to be more and important. The phrase “only the strong survive” has turned into “only the beautiful survive”.

 

So is beauty seen as more important? Yes, I think it is.

And this affects women much more than men. You only have to look at the employment prospects of both sexes. The girl with that long, blond hair and long legs is much more likely to get a job than the short, slightly overweight girl, even though the latter has a PHD and whatnot. Whereas for men, looks do not matter as much.

Then again, dont get me wrong, I am by no means saying that smart people are ugly, or dumb people always beautiful.

 

 

To finally answer your question, for me it’ll always be brains. I would much rather have a decent, deep conversation than positive reinforcement and social acceptance. To hell with those who do not “accept”…its my life.

 

Then again…there are those that like the barking of dogs…

 

~harmonyangel~

[Captivating_SouL]

Physical appearance dies over time and in contrast brains stays with you life-time. Given the facts to both scenro's, one may or may not agree on terms of what to pick. Its true physical characteristics is what makes others stand out from the crowd but how long and how far will looks getchu>? Not far! I'm certain that those individuals who choose to pick "beauty" ova "brains" is just in for the flick not future. So with that said and done....peace

 

! xxx

1

[Instinct.Poet]

Harmony, very well expressed ya thoughts.

BrownSugah,lol,YOu'd really take beauty "ova" brainz?

Damn, when you actually said, beauty don't last fo'eva?

As for me, I never do really judge,But what really

attracts me to female is "Intelligence"smart ladies,

Damn ya'll sexy, i like a woman who knows what she

wants, when she wanted.

So basically looks don't really matter to a centain extent...

 

""Is not your Booty Or beauty is ya BrAiNz BaBy""

[QUANTUM LEAP]

I think there is nothing more attractive then a sweet, honest, and intelligent man/woman who has his/her life together. I may initially start off judging a book by its cover, but when I find out that we are incompatible, I don't allow material possessions or looks to prohibit me from making an exit. It is one thing to be initially attracted to someone based on looks but it is an entirely different thing to stick around when the only thing the person has going for him/her is the fact that he/she is attractive.

 

I also know that it is naive to believe that looks don't matter in this modern Somali society so obsessed with beauty and bodies. People always say looks are not everything and that it's what's on the inside that really matters, but I know for a fact that when you meet someone, initially you aren't looking at the inside. I know this firsthand because of the encounters I have had with the many people I have met over the years. When initially these people get to know you, some stick around and others don't because they realize you are not what they are looking for.

 

This is a part of life; unfortunately we aren't all psychic and able to immediately tell what type of person someone actually is when we meet him or her. Since humans are very visual, we have to rely on our sense of sight to communicate with our brain when we see something we like. After this initial attraction it is up to the individual in question to take the time to use the brain and decide if there is more then a cute face and nice body.

 

I have never heard anyone who is really attractive complain about people approaching him or her because of the way they look. They may get tired of people only sticking around because of the way they look, but I don't think attractive people mind the attention they get.

Brains should always take precedent over beauty, however, until someone invents a pair of goggles that allow us to see inside of a person's head to evaluate the IQ, I will stick to looking at the outside package and then getting to know the inside.

 

That is the way most people select a mate, contrary to what some of the folks here are trying to be so politically correct. Brains before beauty is a myth because if you aren't attracted to the outer features, you may never get a chance to find out if you are attracted to the inside as well.

[codetalker]

To get to tha brains, don't u have to be attracted to the beauty first? ..just a question..

[LANDER]

I think “beauty”(physical beauty) and “brains”(intelligence) are just two parts of a whole we call persona or personality. Some other parts might be sense of humour, morality, dignity etc….But more importantly, Personality is or should be what matters the most. This chemistry we often like to refer to, is neither exclusively due to “brains” or “beauty”, but rather it is created by an entire persona. For example: two “brainy” people might not find each other attractive and two “beautiful” people might not be attracted to one another. Case point being that personal chemistry between people is most important above all else.

[B_A_L_L_E_R_Z]

LOOOOOOOOOL SUPA-MAN I FEEEL YOU U MAN

 

BUT YO IF A GIRL DOESNT LOOK GOOD- AINT NOBODY GONE GIVE HER A SECOND LOOK, AS 4 ME I WOULD JUZ WALK ON BYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

[Baashi]

I will add that beauty matters more than intellect to many people...no question about that. Most folks have average IQ anyway...and few commit in a relationship due to high IQ. I for one would like to get hooked up with someone who has both. The trick is 'beauty' is very subjective term and that's why sociologist prefer to use 'quality'...and beauty is just one variable of whole gammut of qualities. Some would argue that beauty and intellect are not mutually exclusive qualities...that is to say brainy chick is a beautiful chick. Hmm! they may have a point.

[QUANTUM LEAP]

I reckon TIME can always change what one thinks about another. With time you get to know the real person. Besides its only the person looking, Observing and listening who can be the judge of what they see or hear and at the end of the day its what they see, hear, see and fancy that makes them come to the realisation that someone has the qualities they want.

[Cant_Remember]

Although I can't imagine a situation where I will prefer one over the other (given the abundance of women who have both), I think the two things manifest themselves differently and as a result one takes the lead over the other. For example, You have to speak to people in order to find out how smart they are but whether you take the trouble to speak to them depends on how attractive you find them. However, as time goes by intelligence becomes a factor (specially for relationships).

[Sophist]

I will go for the phsicality thing as intelligence is chimera.

[Rising Phoenix]

Instinct-Poet, thanks for the compliment, much obliged...I do try

 

To get to tha brains, don't u have to be attracted to the beauty first? ..just a question..

Afrikan.Theory, this is a good question, but does this statement mean that you will dismiss anyone who is not in your preferred "type"? Of course, I'm also just asking a question...

 

~harmonyangel~

[Thinkerman]

Well if its a qualititative debate then i must surely conclude that Brains would win hands down.

I mean as good looking as someone can be (in the eye of the beholder of course) there is only so long that you can sit idely there with no conversation and just stare.

 

unless your equally lightheaded