Not Without Her Make-up

[Conscious Manipulation]

salaam...

 

This is a forward I received a while ago...

 

 

This a parody written as a Muslim woman encountering

the West (in this case, Australia) for the first time.

Written in a "Not Without My Daughter" style. Mimics

the condescending and ignorant manner some non-Muslims

use in writing about their experiences in the "exotic"

Muslim world.

---------------------------------

Not Without Her Make-Up

 

by Tazin Abdullah

Media Student

Macquarie University, Australia

 

I do not clearly remember the first time I was here.

My earliest memories of Australia start when I was

around six or seven, probably my first trip after I

was born in the city of Sydney. My parents were not

particularly happy with the idea of me growing up

there. So, they took me out to Iran at the first

opportunity.

 

As I grew up, my impressions of Sydney were formed

from stories I heard from my parents, shows I watched

on television and of course, what I saw on my trips.

From my first trip at the age of seven, I vaguely

remember the people I met and the places I visited. I

remember more from my second trip, though, which was

at the age of fourteen. I recall my parents

warning me over and over again about how women were

treated in a society so fundamentally Western.

 

While I was there, I learnt that individuality was

something Australians only dreamt about. I soon

discovered I had to conform to the dress code

everyone else followed. I had to have my hair

highlighted and defrizzed. I had to spend between

fifteen and twenty minutes every morning brushing it

and putting on clips and hair ties. I had to make it

into a ponytail one day, a braid the next and a bun

when I went to dinner parties. I was coerced to wear

short skirts and tight tops, with a push-up bra to

give me cleavage. My legs had to show, smooth and

unscarred, and everyone had to be able to make out my

waist.

 

They told me I had to 'fit in'. Part of the ritual of

fitting in meant that I had to paint my face with what

they called make-up everyday. I discovered that

Australian females liked to attract as much attention

as they could to themselves, by hiding behind their

make-up. They made their kohl in liquids and pencils,

instead of pots like we do, and sold them in stores

under a range of different names and prices. They all

seemed the same to me, though. Anyhow, I bought what

they told me to buy and used what they told me to use,

from lipsticks to abdominizers, changing my body from

head to toe to please their male gods. Such things

ensured that everyone wanted to 'hang out' with me (a

term denoting something to the effect of spending time

and/or social acceptance).

 

In the five years between then and now, I had

convinced myself that Australia would have joined

other countries on the road to progress. But my return

to Sydney both shocks and saddens me. While many parts

of the world have seen development, Australia has

dragged behind, especially with regards to the status

of women. It seems as if it has only succeeded in

digging itself deeper into a bottomless pit of

regression. At this rate, I fear that Australia is a

second America in the making.

 

Upon arrival, I have come across some typical Sydney

women. I can see that they are dictated by the strict

dress code imposed on them by the social system. They

are not allowed to wear loose clothing, headscarves

until they are old or ailing, and it is preferred that

they show as much of their bodies as possible. Women

who break this rule face harsh penalties. Sarah, a

victim of such injustices, told me the specifics. As

punishment for wearing non-revealing clothing, she is

deemed unattractive and given unequal treatment by her

employers. She says she is not considered 'normal'.

 

A day in the life of a normal woman here requires her

appearance to be the focal point. Her sexuality must

be available for everyone to consume.

 

She cannot choose to whom she will disclose her

intimate parts or exercise her sexuality. She does not

have much choice in what she wants to do with her

body. Since the fundamentalist regime insists that it

must be available for display in a certain manner, she

must follow these rules.

 

The rules are based on the Australian Holy Scriptures,

two of which are Dolly and Cosmopolitan. Also known as

magazines, these contain the teachings of hard-liner

editors and reporters/writers who design the way in

which society must view women and the way women must

dress and act. Since the advent of these magazines,

there have been mass conversions in the country to the

faith they preach. Authority and control have been

transferred onto them and they play a vital role in

the life of women. They have institutionalised radical

guidelines such as the 36:24:36 measurement of a

woman's body. Furthermore, they propagate intolerance

and hate to be internalised in all women - hate for

their own bodies, natural intelligence, privacy and

inherent dignity. These women are brainwashed into

believing that their Creator is to blame for their

deficiencies in not automatically meeting these

standards.

 

In accordance with these oppressive impositions, the

country's commerce has developed. Industry is devoted

to the development of products to assist women in

looking as artificial as possible. The market is

filled with products for the face and every different

part of it plus the hair, the hands, the legs, the

nails...the list goes on. I suppose one must

concede to the fact that Australia's delayed

development causes it to prioritise looks over the

fact that millions of people in the world go hungry.

 

It is interesting to look at some of the

advertisements for the beauty products. I will warn

you, though, that coming from an emancipated

society, these will be very disturbing. For instance,

an advertisement for hair colour uses the motto

"L'Oreal - because I'm worth it". A model in an ad for

a shampoo claims that using the shampoo gives her more

confidence. These poor women must shampoo, condition

and colour their hair in order to legitimise

themselves. They need the perfect curl, the right

bounce and the shiniest colour. Their value to society

is directly linked to their hair.

 

Other significant practices are the prevalent marriage

customs. A woman is required to perform the ceremonial

'going out', which can span any period of time from a

day to ten years. This starts as early as primary

school and as she grows up, she goes out with various

men. Until she finds the one she wishes to marry, she

does not commit to any one man. It seems all the men

she goes out with are allowed to touch her and/or

sleep with her.

 

All this time, her status and acceptance in society is

determined by how many of these men she has

accommodated in her life. The greater the quota of

men, the more sufficient she is considered.

Particularly in highschool, young girls have little to

contribute to their own identities. Their identities

derive from who they go out with and how many boys

they go out with. Though this kind of mental torture

is less obvious in later years of their life, my

conversations with many women in university

and work indicate that they still suffer. Some feel

they must get married in order to make a place for

themselves.

 

Marriage, though, is subject to a bizarre rule. A

woman cannot legally marry until she is eighteen years

old without parental consent. It is socially expected,

however, for girls under eighteen to lose their

virginity. When I was listening to one of the popular

radio stations, 2DayFM, I was informed that the

average age that Australians lost their virginity at

is between thirteen and fifteen. As a consequence of

this, many girls under eighteen become pregnant.

Society accepts these girls as mothers before eighteen

but does not allow them to have husbands, who

could also take responsibility as fathers to the

children born. While women must bear the

responsibility of parenthood, men can get away

with it. This is one of the many contradictions that

exist in Australia today.

 

Inequalities also exist for women who do get married.

Marriage requires the woman to play multiple roles.

She must be wife, mother and often a breadwinner of

the family. She shoulders the responsibility of taking

care of her husband and children at home while also

earning money not only for herself, but also for the

family. Whatever she earns is not solely her property.

Unlike Islamic societies, her husband and her family

have a claim to her income and she even pays for

groceries!

 

Often, she is not given the choice of whether she

wants to stay at home or work. The society she lives

in enshrines materiality and money, money and more

money. It is vital to their lifestyles. As a result,

she must go out and work and make her family richer.

On top of that, her position in society is judged on

her ability to work outside the home. She must

suffer the greatest burden in society. She really does

not have the right to choose. Can you imagine a life

where your identity is judged by everything you have

and not everything you are?

 

Even more surprising is the widespread cultural

practice of women changing their surnames to that of

their husbands' once they are married.

 

Amanda, a law student, who opposes this practice,

tells me that, in previous times, this act symbolised

the transfer of all of a woman's rights and

property to her husband from her father. Though the

custom of a woman becoming her husband's property has

ceased to exist, women still change their names to

that of their husbands'.

 

Seeing all this, I am aware that Australian women are

denied the rights that are basic to many Muslim women.

What concerns me, though, is whether or not they are

aware of that fact.

 

I remember from my second trip to Australia that I

felt I had a Western noose tied around my neck. I felt

I had no space to breathe or to let myself free. The

air around me cloaked my beauty, my spirit and my

soul.

 

But I was lucky. I could leave. Most of the Australian

women I spoke to do not have that alternative. They do

not even know of their plight. They are pushed into a

corner where they cannot see outside the boundaries of

such a fundamentally Western society.

 

Women immune to Western correctness - mostly the

educated Muslims - have begun programmes to educate

others around them. They are asserting

themselves by breaking out of the confinement, wearing

loose clothing and denying just anyone access to their

sexuality. I see their efforts as a glimmer of hope.

It is crucial that before women can improve their

lot, they are taught the rights they have that society

has taken away from them.

 

Nevertheless, there is still hope. I call upon all the

Muslim women in the world to come to the rescue of

Australian women. I urge that all of us stand up

against Western oppression in different parts of the

world. It is our responsibility to bring progress into

these societies and it is up to us to save them.

[La Fidele]

Conscious,

That was a great read--i loved it! Jazakallahu khairan!

[7_steps_2_Heaven]

very intresting indeed!

but I think it's not only in australia, it's happening all around da world.

What can we do about it? nothing!

just try ur best not 2 become 1 of them!

[Xafsa]

very interesting read walaahi. thanks walaal.

[Pebbles]

"Pain and foolishness lead to great bliss and complete knowledge, for Eternal Wisdom created nothing under the sun in vain." -Kahlil Gibran

beautiful qoute

[Valenteenah.]

WoW...Stylishly written piece. Fantastic CM

[Xafsa]

Originally posted by Pebbles:

quote: "Pain and foolishness lead to great bliss and complete knowledge, for Eternal Wisdom created nothing under the sun in vain." -Kahlil Gibran

beautiful qoute

Indeed it is---makes so much sense...yet it is so hard to except.

[Blessed]

Great article. Man Sha Allah. I think its safe to say that many women muslims and nonmuslims alike are waking up and discovering the liberating characteristic of Islaam