Jewel Posted December 12, 2003 Athena, well said. Boys, take notes, ur in sore need. Underdog, pot calling the kettle black? if u interpreted what i said to u as an attack, then u calling me incompetent and lazy is just a compiment right? How's the cave coming along? need any decorations suggestions? U said u wanted to be the breadwinner and ur wife to stay home, well, good for u, but some of us don't want to stay home, and it has nothing to do with not wanting to be there for ur kids or husband so stop making it like women who work outside the home are neglecting their families. Open up that "intellectual" mind u were speaking of excercise some common sense instead of ur unrealitic dreams and expectations of what a wife should be. Try focusing on becoming a good husband instead of worrying what she's making for dinner. Bashi, instead of looking at hibo's q to mean that a man who sees a strong woman runs literally, u gotta read btw the lines. It means that, many men see a woman with intellect who challenges the status quo as a threat to their ideal way of thinking (someone clearly demonmstrated hibo's point) If u want a yes sir, no sir kinda gal, i suggest a slave will do u men good, but a real woman with ideas wants to voice them, and God forbid if she opens up her mouth and expresses her feeble mind...the horror...come on men, a real man would be supportive of his wife, instead of thinking of her working outside the home as time away from him and the kids. ex. my father use to work outside the home, and still would make breakfast for the kids and mom, and still go to work, and my mom would work as well and make dinner...point is, they made sacrifices and compromises, which is lacking in somali society these days. Its' either the man's way or no way. Thank God there are more muslim men out there , wouldn't wanna choose from the pile i see. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
-Serenity- Posted December 12, 2003 Yes Jewel, its sad indeed a few SOL'er feel the only way they can disagree with you is by attacking your intellect...when as a matter of fact, you're too stunned by their mind-numbing rambling to even consider responding Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
underdog Posted December 12, 2003 Jewel, let try this one more time On the other hand if you're too lazy or too incompetant to maintain YOUR home missed that little word, did we? "IF"...maybe af ingiriiska aa kugucusub. and maybe Athena can provide some proof of where it is that I said women shouldn't get an education. I just hope neither of you is pursuing a career in diplomacy and mediation...take a note pad write down what I said, get a thesaurus give yourself a few days to understand then on Monday repress the need to say things that are uncalled for and retort to the issue at hand. You both seem very smart when you want to be so I'll assume you vulgar comments directed to me are not a front for lack of genuine ideas comments and suggestions. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baashi Posted December 12, 2003 Bashi, instead of looking at hibo's q to mean that a man who sees a strong woman runs literally, u gotta read btw the lines. It means that, many men see a woman with intellect who challenges the status quo as a threat to their ideal way of thinking (someone clearly demonmstrated hibo's point) No Jewel I didn't look it that way. You thought I did. Hibo's point is well-taken. I just don't agree with the "...many men see a woman with intellect who challenges the status quo as a threat to their ideal way of thinking" line. I think it is the other way around. Many Somali men do respect that kind of women. Thier dream is to have one with these attributes as their wife. Some of them got lucky and went home with qallanjo. Some, in the selection process, got overlooked. Some find these qualities attractive but find the overall package unacceptable (looks, cambative, arrogant) to their taste and exercized their perogative to move on to find someone else more appealing to their liking. What I don't understand is y'all generalizing the whole thing and making it as balck and white. There are more than that to it. Is there a room for preferences? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Qac Qaac Posted December 12, 2003 Athena just because u speak English, do u think u r more educated, then the women in somalia. all we as men, if i could talk for them, is we wanna marry somali women, if we want to marry a cadaan girl, we could've here, so when u guys bring their ideologies to us. we just leave. coz we want a somali lady, who thinks her calture is superiority over the west, not one that thinks it is back home thing, do u believe your calture is inferior to the west?...... no wonder why the devorce is too high, on the somalies in the west, it is this kind os ideologies, Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuCkY Posted December 12, 2003 Lol @ Underdog...misunderstood aint ya! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
-Serenity- Posted December 12, 2003 UD I should really stop acknowledging your presence..you seem to crave attention from the fairer sex and hence your presence in this section almost all your time ... Maybe if you talked more about male-related issues with a few gents, you'd realize where da problem lies...and learn to present your view more constructively. Anywayz, lay off the "leaves" eh? You seem to have an aura of "highness"(pun intended) about your posts all we as men, if i could talk for them, is we wanna marry somali women, if we want to marry a cadaan girl, we could've here, so when u guys bring their ideologies to us. we just leave. coz we want a somali lady, who thinks her calture is superiority over the west, not one that thinks it is back home thing, do u believe your calture is inferior to the west?...... Qac Qaac I dont know what ur talking about mate...cadaan aint synonymous with education. Besides, whats a culture got to do with depriving some1 of reaching their full potential? And we are Muslims and wish to take the best of both worlds...nothing western about that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Qac Qaac Posted December 12, 2003 bisinka abaayo afka ha iga koosanin, all i said is i want a somali woman, not one who is cadaan insdie u know what i mean. it is my choice u don't have to attack me, ilaahey ha kuu naxariistana, and pls don't bring the religion into this. ok. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
underdog Posted December 12, 2003 And still no answer..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Khayr Posted December 12, 2003 And since you're independant and self-sufficient I'll save my services for a woman who needs it and can appreciate a man that will take care of her. I'm looking for a woman I can provide for and protect. Someone who completes my skills not competes with them. By Underdog Hey, Underdog, there are plenty of women like that around. There just in their 30's or single mothers. But if you want younger then 30s and no single mothers, then get your ticket and head over to Somalia/Somaliland or Kenya where you will get run down by the ladies and really feel like a 'KING'. Hibo, take a different approach to brothers and maybe act more docile (gentlier). You don't have to try to convince every man about 'women's issues'. We are men after all! If you need some real romantic men, head over to Burco or aerghaboo. They don't know much about 'Women's rights' but they sure will know about a 'Women's heart' and how to steal it!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
-Serenity- Posted December 12, 2003 Qac Qaac, Walaalo, I dont recall saying anything unpleasant to you... I c we are all operating on different frequencies today ... Mr.Chauvinistic Mysogynist... I'll not answer whateva it is ur waiting 4 ... 'cause u'll simply not understand it. And finally with regards to Hibo's question. I think it depends on how you present yourself - arrogant and condescending or pleasnnt natured yet competent and articulate. The later usually doesnt offend most men...unless they were chauvinistis pigs! in which case its advicable to stay clear of them Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Qac Qaac Posted December 12, 2003 abaayo sheekadaada waala fahmay Athena, u read that book, huh, men are from mars, and women are from venus. and the earth is in the middle of those 2 planets ok. so all day u r saying we so different. got you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Somali-feminist Posted December 12, 2003 salaamu alaikum wr wb, You are comparing her to a cadaan cause she says she rather get educated n help out her community? Allah(swa)said both the men n women r khalifah's of this earth (Quran 33:72-73). I know ur not trying to belittle her statuesque just because these sisters know their rights... for the ones suggesting they should bring along their notepads, I hope your already doting down some notes urself, for it seems to me you are in desperate need of enlightment...What puzzled me the most is how these men sit there and analyze the sisters for stating they want to pursue with their education, and insha'Allah get prestigious jobs...instead of promoting her for all her efforts, you attack her, and question her character by stigmatizing her as a "cadan woman" (shakes her head disapprovingly).....In Islam we are permitted to obtain a job, so who are you to say otherwise? What you are suggesting is after marriage she should seize her passions n she should discard everything she has worked for, since you married her she should become your property right? She is to be your partner in life, not a damir aad soo ijaratay! Qaac I don’t think Athena claimed she was more educated than sisters in Somalia: however she knows her rights. The prophet(scw) said "to seek knowledgeis obligatory on every muslim"(Al-bani) what is the point of getting knowledge if u can't taste the labour of ur fruits? Qaac: I know this might be hard for you to grasp, but could the reason why the divorce rate is so high possibly have to do with the fact that the certain mali men still suffer from the syndrome of the stone-age mentality? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ayaanick Posted December 12, 2003 Soomalidu waxay ku maahmaahdaa runtu raga kama nixiso. Markii runtii la'idiin sheegana, waad naxaysaan. Hadii aan anigu runtii ka-hadlo raga hada jira, aad iyo aad bay u jilicsan yihiin. Taasina waxaan ku keenay, waxaan arakay rag aad utira badan, oo igu yiri marar badan "walaalay, aad buud u kulushayhay", even though anigu waxaan uun aan ku iri aay ilahayd xaaladu siday ku mudnayd. Hadii aad nagu leedihiin ha'hadlina oo uun iska aamusnaada no matter waxaan idunka samayno, dee taa si mashaqaynayso. Waxaa lagayaabaa, in ay jiraan dumar badan oo aamusnaanta u dhashay(taasi maha doqon nimo), teeda kale waxaa jira dumar badan oo u dhashay kulkulaylka(taasi ma aha waalin), laboda dhinacba dadku way kala duwan yihiin. Marka walaalayaal ha dii aad raadinaysaan qof dumara oo aan waxaba idinka o'anaynin, waxaan umalaynayaa, in wakhtigaas lasoo dhaafay. Badankiin tariikhda aduunka ha dii laraaco, Durmaku markasta waxay ahaanyeen kuwa wax raaca, wax dhaygsta, wax fala, laakiin aduunku uu isbadalay, ee labadalma baan idin oran laahaa. Gabari hadii ay kula fadhiisan karto, oo ay kula doodi karta, doesn't mean you must label her as a competitor, waxaad u fiiran kartaa qof iskaa barbar dhigtay, because she belongs there. see ya Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
underdog Posted December 12, 2003 Mr.Chauvinistic Mysogynist... I'll not answer whateva it is ur waiting 4 ... 'cause u'll simply not understand it. Yet more proof that you didn't even read what I said and are just looking for a fight... I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
