Isra Posted December 23, 2001 Salam I would not want to spend 10's of thousands on a wedding for gods name its a party where i entertain other people.Now how does that benefit me. Maybe a max of 11,000 bucks on everything. And the rest goes to the best honeymoon the married world has seen. Like the arabs say the "month of honey". To the point of half n'half i dont compeletly agree on that one.Women should help,but its the mans responsibilty lets keep it traditional. Xaq or dowry do men actually in the west give the money to the women or is just a formality. Some ppl say tis suppose to be given if the man divorces the woman , and others say its suppose to be given before the wedding.So which one is it? Peace Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LadyFatima Posted December 24, 2001 Salaama All, Jaber.. the Dowry usually divides into 3ccategories! One is what they call YARAD!.. this money goes to the Bride's Family alone. 2nd is SOORYO! this money goes to any man (be it from the Man's side or the woman's side) Who happen to be at the Meher ceremony.... 3rd is the MEHER money this money is the one you pay or promise to pay to your wife! However, the 'MEHER' doesn't always have to mean money it could be a set of Dahab(Gold) or Cloth, or GEEl(Camel) Normally they ask for a Dahab! To isra... the Meher money sis if the husband to be has it and can pay her when they wed that is acceptable also, If they choose he can Pay it back while they're married!! But in anyhow that money must be paid back b4 or when he divorces her!! It does seem burden when you Sort it this way but what is demanded or XAQ should I say is the Meher money! this is Of course religion-wise!! the rest is usually based on Tradition...and if you don't have it the family or the bride shouldn't force you or make it Obligatory! Since that is Haraam! Anyway, Ina'mayahow Waxaa layiri Bakhayli intuu ba'yo ayaa badan! just because it's not Obligatory (religion-wise) that doesn't mean it's OK for you guy's not to pay what is expected of you, So plz Check 'em wallets again Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
-MusLimaH- Posted December 24, 2001 Asalaamu Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatu My brother got married a year and a half ago...the whole wedding costed about £20,000 can u believe that? lol wallahi that was a waste of money...I mean, its only for a couple of days and then its over...why waste so much money on something that no one will ever remember after they leave the party??? Personally, I'd rather have a cheap wedding and spend the rest of the money saved up for a nice car and a beautiful honeymoon...unfortunetly...I doubt my mother would agree with that :'( ps that doesn't mean I don't want no dowry though...i'm sure i'm worth at least a couple of good camels Ma'Salaama [This message has been edited by -MusLimaH- (edited 12-24-2001).] Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Libaax-Sankataabte Posted April 14, 2002 Welcome back Jaber. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 14, 2002 Jabar ur rite! De money belongs to de woman, but the man doesn't have to provide the money upfront, it's something they (both wife-to-be & hubby-to-be) agree on. It's like an insurance incase the hubby divorces his wifey, he is obliged to give her what he promised her incase he haven't already. So sistas makes sure u agree on sumthin >>BIG<< lol. Take care ya'll & stay well. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
blue Posted April 14, 2002 20,000 pounds is too much! What is wrong with us people? I blame women for this because they are emotionaly attached to the wedding party than to the man she is getting married to. If you can afford it, do it by all means but we know most Somalis are either working poor or poor. Most people are not rich. A few here and there who are into business or have corporate jobs that are not secure. This is one of the main reasons the devorce rate among Somali women/men is high. Good luck to all of you who are contemplating on getting married. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 15, 2002 £20,000?? If clueless Halimo gets THAT much spent on her 4 jus one night, then I want some of that! Do u think he'll give it to me in cash, if I don't want a big wedding? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ayaan8321 Posted April 15, 2002 i dont think that will be happening..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 17, 2002 Barwaaqo...a radical idea indeed...imagine not wanting to blow 20 big ones in a single night on complete frivolty ! What fun you'll be missing...with all the maryooley speculating whether they see a bumb under that sheer gown... everyone wondering if those uninvited thugs in the corner stole the xalwad... all orchestrated to the tune of two female nomads shrieking and tearing into each other center stage...(extension pieces flying left right and center)...and all because one dared to ask the other why the "goon" wasn't married too at her age (a common sore point I believe!) ----------------------------- Just another nugget of Cats warped world Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 17, 2002 libaax: jaber is no where to be found...so I don't know who u r wlcing... barwaaqo: dream on girlie... dreams r legal..so have them as much as u can!! ------------------ Each one of us is a masterpiece in progress Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 18, 2002 Originally posted by WILDCAT7: all orchestrated to the tune of two female nomads shrieking and tearing into each other center stage...(extension pieces flying left right and center)...and all because one dared to ask the other why the "goon" wasn't married too at her age (a common sore point I believe!) How right u r! Imagine wanting to miss all that fun! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jaber Posted April 18, 2002 Thanx LSK Hibo Am here Canbarro! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 18, 2002 Jaber: That only tells u how much we missed having u around here! wlc back....ur theories have been missed immensely! ------------------ Each one of us is a masterpiece in progress Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites