Blessed Posted June 23, 2003 Salaams .. ya'll, this is funny. Ladies, these come in handy if your feeling bored and he hasn't given you a good enough reason to hit him upsaide the head. Brothers, a sneak preview... don't ever say that am not nice to you The questions are: 1. What are you thinking about? 2. Do you love me? 3. Do I look fat? 4. Do you think she is prettier than me? 5. What would you do if I died? What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrect (i.e. tells the truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below, along with possible responses. 1. What are you thinking about? The proper answer to this, of course, is "I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are and how lucky I am to have met you." Inappropriate answers: a. Baseball b. Football c. How fat you are. d. How much prettier she is than you. e. How I would spend the insurance money if you died. (Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy, who once told Peg, "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking to you!") 2. Do you love me? The proper response is "YES!", or if you feel a more detailed answer is in order "Yes, dear". Inappropriate responses include: a. I suppose so. b. Would it make you feel better if I said yes? c. That depends on what you mean by love. (Clinton's response) d. Does it matter? e. Who, me? 3. Do I look fat? The correct answer is an emphatic "Of course not!" Incorrect: a. Compared to what? b. I wouldn't call you fat, but you're thighs sure do make a lot of noise. c. A little extra weight looks good on you. d. I've seen fatter. e. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died. 4. Do you think she's prettier than me? Once again, the proper response is an emphatic "Of course not!" Incorrect responses: a. Yes, but you have a better personality. b. Not prettier, but definitely thinner. c. Not as pretty as you when you were her age. d. Define pretty. e. Could you repeat the question, I was thinking of the insurance money again. 5. What would you do if I died? A definite no win question here. (The real answer, of course, is "Buy a new Porsche.") No matter how you answer this question, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up question, usually along these lines: Woman: Would you get married again? Man: Definitely not! Woman: Why not ... don't you like being married? Man: Of course, I do. Woman: Then why wouldn't you re-marry? Man: OK, I'd get married again. Woman: YOU WOULD (hurtful look on face)?? Man: Yes, I would. Woman: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with hers? Man: That would seem like the proper thing to do. Woman: And would you let her use my golf clubs? Man: She can't use them, she is left handed. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Reality Check Posted June 23, 2003 lol@ Man: She can't use them, she is left handed. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SHAKA ZULU Posted June 23, 2003 Originally posted by Ameenah: The questions are: 1. What are you thinking about?(my bank account balance) 2. Do you love me?(would you be my wife if i didn't?) 3. Do I look fat?(do you think i would marry you if i thought you looked fat) 4. Do you think she is prettier than me?(who? sorry sweetheart but i only got eyes for you.) 5. What would you do if I died?(take to the cemetary) that is how my answer will be like Ameenah if you ask me those Questions again. beacuse you know i am not in the mood for that kind paranoia. . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
underdog Posted June 23, 2003 THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE I WOULDN'T WANT US LIVING A LIE Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blessed Posted June 27, 2003 Originally posted by SHAKA ZULU: [ 1. What are you thinking about?(my bank account balance) why what have you been doing with my money? 2. Do you love me?(would you be my wife if i didn't?) answer the question. ppl marry 4 different reasons! 3. Do I look fat?(do you think i would marry you if i thought you looked fat) would you divorce me if I got fat? u shallow man, did U only marry me for my looks? are u saying that i am ****** ? 4. Do you think she is prettier than me?(who? sorry sweetheart but i only got eyes for you.) so your telling me that Hale is not pretty .. man your a lier .. u expect me to blv that shidh? 5. What would you do if I died?(take to the cemetary) waan ba'ay... so you wwouldn't even be emotionally stricken by my untimely demise ... you'd just get rid of me just like that? :mad: :mad: :mad: Underdog .. sweetheart... lil lies won't kill Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WILDCAT Posted June 27, 2003 LMAO! The sick part is, I've discovered these are questions asked more often by men :eek: Just the other night, the "what are you thinking" stinker came up. I of course said "enjoying the moment with you sweetie" The truth - I wonder if the fit guy over in that corner has a six pack Seriously, women get a bad rep. Or it could just be this kind of role reversal is an odd and rare thing that only happens to The Cat. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AalTo Posted June 30, 2003 1. What are you thinking about? ( will u marry me?) 2. Do you love me? (yeah why not honey) Do I look fat? (oh dont even think about that..hey honey will u keep ur body in shape) 4. Do you think she is prettier than me? (huh i thought u have confidence..i dont care about others..u are cute honey) e. How I would spend the insurance money if you died.? ( why are u asking that..huh) lol..how are u doing ameenah..it was last time when u give me wrong number..would u give rite one now.. oh again i forget my watch at home...hey wat is the time by ur watch cuz ..i have LINuX CLASS today...(walaley adiga rurumey ayaaba kaaga helay) brb:) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Valenteenah. Posted June 30, 2003 LoL @ Ameenah... Naayaa, why are you posting our secrets? Do you really want the faraxs to wisen up? :mad: Originally posted by CarbonBasedLifeform: Just the other night, the "what are you thinking" stinker came up. I of course said "enjoying the moment with you sweetie" The truth - I wonder if the fit guy over in that corner has a six pack Smooth as usual eh gurly? Good to see you posting. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blessed Posted July 4, 2003 AalTO lol. Walaalo, why do you ask me for the time? and I don't do the fake number thing, I do the isgu aan kuu soo noqdee and disappear act, but you'd have to really bug me to get treated like that lol CBLF Hey, girl nice to have you posting again. You, know this nick does you no justice I would suggest something like Casanova for you Carbon based is a rather limited depicyion of The Cat Barwaaqo, Sweetie, I got tired of their wotless ways, I thought giving them pointers in the right direction would somewhat help them outt of the daze. Notice "huh" seems to be used as an alternative for a great deal words :rolleyes: Besides, I haven't told the commandments to them, so waa cadiyos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
N.O.R.F Posted July 4, 2003 looool! no matter how we may answer those question, as soon we start working the ' charm ' on you ladies u will be wrapped around our little fingers again. Sad but true!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Xafsa Posted July 4, 2003 ^^^^^^are you sure those are somali girls wrapped around your finger? This reminds me of the mello yellow commercials....if your in the states you know what i'm talking about AAmeenah.... You can lead a horse to water but you can't force it to drink....somehow I don't think their bright enough to realise that we have just given them the master answer key to the mother of all tests. Carbon based life form---- glad to see your back. peace and luv Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Valenteenah. Posted July 4, 2003 Ameenah... Ah...well, since we've still got the commandments under wrap, I guess we can throw them a few crumbs here and there. LoL @ flying-still... "You can lead a horse to water but you can't force it to drink"...so true. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
N.O.R.F Posted July 4, 2003 lol@You can lead a horse to water but you can't force it to drink.......i think you may have us confused with camels.....we may not want to drink.......yet! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Xafsa Posted July 4, 2003 ^^^^heeheeehee^^ Not yet huh? WE'll see Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AalTo Posted July 5, 2003 lol. Walaalo, why do you ask me for the time? AMEEENAH ADIGA IYO ANIGA KALAMA DHERIN..(ISKUMEEL AYAAN DEGENAHAY ..LAKIN DONT ASK ME WHO I AM ) WHAT EVER HAPPEN I WILL NOT TELL U...WHO I AM:) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
