mz-alpha-soup Posted January 9, 2010 ok here goes..education is key to evryone but when i get married inshallah i want to stay home and raise my children and use the education i have recieved to better them..i dont believe in this crap of a woman throwing her kids in creche' and going to work...i mean first off some other woman is raising your child with her morals..all you are doing is puting them to sleep and when your husband comes home, most likely there will be no food on the table....ahem...oh and b4 i forget i think to be taught deenta is more important.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rahima Posted January 9, 2010 Isn't it amazing how we all have choice and can do as we like? Good luck in yours Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cynical lady Posted January 9, 2010 What an eligible wife-material you must be and yes thank you for the advert. But do me a favour next time you want to highlight your “eligibility” just come out with it, instead of this sort of nonsense. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Malika Posted January 9, 2010 ^That was harsh mpendwa. I agree with Rahima,its all about choice.We all make our own choices to how we want to live our lives. Best of luck with your choices dear poster.. ps.The deen never discriminated about roles,nor educating females. If you look in Islamic history,women took a leading role in teaching about Islam to the masses[e.g A'isha[ra],ummu Salama,Hafsa etc etc.]There were many women whom were transmitters of Rasuuls' Hadith. Women whom took upon themselves to open educational institution that not only benefited the ummah,actually become world renowned.. pss.I understand where your coming from,as they say an educated mother is an educated nation,but that doesn't mean we all have to be house wife's to effective mothers. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Curly Posted January 9, 2010 ^^ ouch CL Mz Alpha Soup as Rahima said it's your opinion and you're entitled to it but walaal I feel it's my duty to explain that it's not always that black and white. The reality is that many people can not afford to have only one household income whilst raising children, unless you're planning to marry a guy who comes from money or earns a salary to cover you all...(your odds are a little slim there) then that'll work but why settle for less just because you want to carry on this tradition that 'the mother is the only parent' you say by putting your child in a creche someone else is raising that child, what about the father of that child? I'm not denying that finding childcare for your child is difficult, but often it isn't a option it's a necessity. Sadly in our community they see another third option and in the real world it's called benefit fraud. Hardly an example you'd want to set for your child! I'd want my child to be better than me so why limit them with this idea that sure you can be educated but don't bother to do anything with it because you're a woman and xaar iyo caruur ba ka dhanbaya. By the way you can cook after a 9-5 and so can he, i do it all the time...it probably seems so difficult when you're living under your parents roof. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paragon Posted January 9, 2010 The most important thing in a Somali wife is her ability to cook good (saafi faraha la isaga goosto) food at home. The rest is secondary. It all depends on her mother - whether or not she taught her how to cook good food. Any woman who can't cook some good hilib/bariis/baasto isn't even worth a man's effort. Those who cook some foreign qashin food and think that is reer Magaalnimo are useless. All her other particularities are absolutely secondary to her cooking and keeping skills. I believe thus. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cynical lady Posted January 9, 2010 Ohh come on Mpenzi and Curly; this is what she’s telling us: I’m educated Wish to get married Religious Fertile and ready to bore the children of some faraax On education: should only be used for the betterment of the offspring’s and not for employment. On women who work: can’t abide women who outsource their reproductive responsibilities to others. The icing: a husband must have his meal prepared when he gets home. Well hello for calling it as i see it ...the statement above rigs nothing but self advertisement for soon to be staying home mommy. According to her how dare women throw their kids to “crèche” and go work and let another woman raise their kids for them? How dare indeed, and more importantly a working mother ought to feel shame of herself, “i mean truly all they’re doing is putting the kids to sleep”. And the awful part of it all is she is not only a failure as a mother but also as a wife; failing to provide food for her husband when he sit foot to the house ahem she also a failure on the religion front. What a disgrace. It’s already hard for women out-there making that tough decision, without adding an ill-informed opinion onto the debate. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cara. Posted January 9, 2010 ^ You hit the nail on the head. Speaking of hitting I wonder what the Mz Alpha's views are on beating women if they step out of line... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cynical lady Posted January 9, 2010 A sign of Love Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miriam1 Posted January 9, 2010 GOD ! why did your title need a "BUT" there are no "BUT's". you must be very young or simply faking it. lol just read the comment's above - hehe. well it does sound like an advert people do really get married to men/women they meet online - how odd Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chubacka Posted January 9, 2010 You don't have to justify your choices Mz A Soup, do what you think is right and see how it goes, personally i wouldnt put any child under 3 in nursery. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mz-alpha-soup Posted January 9, 2010 wow..seems like i touched a raw nerve or 2.. Rahima..u are right about us having choices and this is mine...about fincancial problems.. there are alot of ways of getting around that..like working from home in the evening when your children are young and when they go to school you can work too az long az u leave work early to cook for them and go pick them up if need be..... ms cynical..am trying to advertise myself? ookk :rolleyes: ..u can say its nonesense or watever.. bottom line iz not raising your kids yourself iz a negative in my book...not being there and having food ready when your husband and children come home iz a negative too..lots of marriages have ended because of this...dont delude yourself luv..az for what i think of a man who hits a woman..how about u figure it 4 yourself and come up with more assumptions.. thts all u seem to be good at :cool: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mz-alpha-soup Posted January 9, 2010 hayam am not young nor am i faking anything.. read carefully what i said in the biginning to see why i used 'but' chubaka ..good for you.. oh and dont forget of all those stories about these child minders molesting kids..allahu manajeynaa.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mz-alpha-soup Posted January 9, 2010 malika u make alot of sense ..i'll give you that...dont get me wrong tho ..education iz key..na asante dada for enlightening me on the islamic history of women..but you know very well that life back then was compelety different from now..most of those women used to follow what the religion says about the rights of a husband and vise versa nowadays all that is out of the window .. its all about choice..best of luck in yours too sis Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Curly Posted January 9, 2010 Excuse me mz but the prophet's first wife Khadija was a business woman. Is that unislamic? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites