Malika Posted June 9, 2009 "Caring. A woman's role?" Are we born natural carers [companion of men?]? or has this been stilled within us as we grow aka how we are nurtured. What do you think? How do you feel? What is your understanding on the issue? Please share. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted June 9, 2009 I think it is mostly something we are nurtured with, it depends on our up bringing. Men aside, how your brought up affects your inclination towards having kids, or even baby sitting kids. Some women love kids and your can see they are natural careers because on their experience. Others have to force themselves. My little niece is 10years old, from when her younger sister was born, when she was 7years old, we leave her to take care of her, the other two were a lot older and busy. She loves kids, she's been talking about having kids since her younger sister was born. Talking about “So when can I have my own” :eek: I told her she needs to do well in her primary school exams the other day, at least key stage 4/5, she turn around and said, that’s okay, I don't want to be a doctor like Xalimo (her 15yr old sister) I want to be a house wife. :mad: I am not child or man friendly, I come with a warning, I was not born with it nor was I nurtured with that role. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Resistance Posted June 9, 2009 I think all women are born with it, some are just more caring than others thats all. Motherhood is most certently not natured, am sure it comes naturally no matter how 'hard' one is. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted June 9, 2009 ^^^Yeah possible, but it slowly grows on some, like when they are 40, suddenly they want to be a mother, before than they will mock the idea and be hating. Others from when they are 15, the plan how many kids they are going to have. It must have something to do with the environment. If you are from a big family, you are more likely to want a big family yourself.... or maybe not. Malika why do you ask?? and you did not tell us what you think? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cynical lady Posted June 9, 2009 Are we talking about caring for men or children here? Am with Ibtiz Malika Mpenwa clarify please. P.S there is no such thing as a “natural” woman’s role even in child rearing, reproduction is a two way street. In short it’s socially constructed role and varies in different context, hence we can’t generalise. I also think both genders are more than capable in performing that role; yes society places more emphasis on the women than men. But it will be naïve of us to assume men don’t perform them too, they do so but do it differently. More importantly gender roles are not fixed and we shouldn’t be looking at them as such specially now with the on-going crumbling of the traditional family/community structure i.e. as society changes so do the roles. Anyhow it’s no good for women to hold on to them “caring role” if you ask me. It’s not a role that is naturally/exclusivel y bestowed to women, its culture and it’s high time that changes too. But then again there is no such thing as “women”. By the way what’s your definition of caring? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chocolate and Honey Posted June 9, 2009 I believe it is both Nature&Nurture. Women tend to be a little bit more caring and considerate of other people than men but if you dont nurture that feeling and if the enviorenment discourages such type of behaviors then, they lose that soft side of them. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Malika Posted June 9, 2009 Interesting so mahaa? It's quite complex.. Perhaps if we look at factors that might have contributed e.g Scientific - hormones? Or Religious Obligation - That includes all religions?, Social structures - Patriachy? What makes a woman more caring then a man? Why are they more women in 'caring proffessions' then men? LOL..I know more question huh! CL & Ibti..I am researching. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sophist Posted June 11, 2009 Caring is a human trait and isnt confined or monopolised by one gender! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted June 11, 2009 I think it all boils down with the roles women played for centuries. Most of these roles were they were teachers, nurses, housewives, midwives etc. The reason being Allah swt created us to be more emotional than men. This does not mean women are weaker than men or less important. Just we are more emotional and that’s not a bad thing. One needs to be emotional if they are going to be more aware of other people’s feelings. I mean really you see that women share more with their friends/family than men. You are not going to see a man sharing with his friends with anything very detailed or personal where women share more and comfort each other more. They are more understanding to each other. Where maybe men would laugh at their friend and be like why are you being emotional, move on, be a man. This does sound generalization but believe me its true in most aspects. There is always exception to the rule. That is not to say men don't have feelings believe me they do, the prophet csw was a very caring and generous man. It's only about relativity. Also you did notice when it comes to funerals women are not allowed to be present when the dead is being buried, cuz allah swt knows that they are very emotional and that whole incident can just a bit too much for them to take in. Inshallah this is just what I think, perhaps am not right. Just you know my opinion… salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted June 11, 2009 LOL CL... give yur two cents Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lt-Qalbi-Adeyg Posted June 11, 2009 Originally posted by Sabriya: I think it all boils down with the roles women played for centuries. Most of these roles were they were teachers, nurses, housewives, midwives etc. The reason being Allah swt created us to be more emotional than men. This does not mean women are weaker than men or less important. Just we are more emotional and that’s not a bad thing. One needs to be emotional if they are going to be more aware of other people’s feelings. I mean really you see that women share more with their friends/family than men. You are not going to see a man sharing with his friends with anything very detailed or personal where women share more and comfort each other more. They are more understanding to each other. Where maybe men would laugh at their friend and be like why are you being emotional, move on, be a man. This does sound generalization but believe me its true in most aspects. There is always exception to the rule. That is not to say men don't have feelings believe me they do, the prophet csw was a very caring and generous man. It's only about relativity. Also you did notice when it comes to funerals women are not allowed to be present when the dead is being buried, cuz allah swt knows that they are very emotional and that whole incident can just a bit too much for them to take in. Inshallah this is just what I think, perhaps am not right. Just you know my opinion… salaam I dunno about other men, but I'm very in touch with my feminine side, in fact I enjoy crying for absolutely no reasons and I am very emotional, thank you very much!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aaliyyah Posted June 11, 2009 ^lol if you are very emotional, with the emphasis on the "very"...then you'r certainly an exception to the rule....bt the rule is men are usually wanna come across more tough and more in control. salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lt-Qalbi-Adeyg Posted June 11, 2009 ^ well i'm not a big fan of 'rules', maybe that's why. so who is making these rules up? are you talking about society, or biological roles? p.s i'm just being the devils advocate here. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The_Siren Posted June 13, 2009 Originally posted by Sophist: Caring is a human trait and isnt confined or monopolised by one gender! I concur and also happen to agree with Cynical Lady's eye roll. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites