Shisha Joints

[The_Siren]

Morrocan Shisha joints

 

 

I’m not sure if any of you have noticed this but I have become increasing aware of the rise in popularity of Moroccan styled shisha joints masquerading as restaurants amongst many of our young Somali men and women. So much in fact that I’d always heard from friends that such places were wonderful, delightful evenings out- full of happiness and frolicking innocent gaiety of the most acute kind. Naturally, having heard all the hype the world has to offer about Moroccan food and smoke tasting of a variety fruits I decided after declining several invitations to accompany a group of ladies to a number of shisha joints to see what the buzz was all about.

 

What I found turned out to be quite an amusing if not a completely hilarious night and all for the wrong reasons.

 

Firstly the Moroccan and Algerians (As I like to call them the Dhillo-Arabs and ladies you know why) were making somewhat suggestive winks and stares-not mention holding obvious ball scratching contests in a bid to impress our bemused Somali woman who very often weren’t even paying attention (Well the smart ones weren’t).

 

Secondly the lighting or lack of- shall I say was nothing less than a cheap albeit avid interpretation of what I can only imagine to be a seedy Arabian brothel, complete with smoky atmosphere, romantic lighting and eastern inspired plush cushions scattered across every reclining surface. The place invited you to lower your guard, loosens your limbs and fairly slouch all over the furniture as if you were some long revived Arabian prince searching for beauties to add to his already near to bursting harem (I know I have quite an imagination). But I kid you not, I really did feel as if I was transported back in time to some horny Arab den of iniquity and even imagined to have heard the rustling chimes of some Egyptian belly dancers ankle bracelets. It was peculiar and funny not to mention more than a little awkward for me I must confess. Its not that I have a problem with pretending to be a honry arab prince for one night but with the lack of privacy and the many “come hither” wolf like gestures you get I found it to be quite unappealing indeed.

 

Thirdly the food was aright, some what mediocre (apart from the fruit cocktails which were in all fairness delicious) and the infamous almost celestial in greatness shisha turned out to be nothing but what I had already anticipated. Carbon with a variety of fruity flavors, I took a puff or two of the smoke thing- found that it was blah (As I knew it would be but I still thought I’d try to enjoy myself but I didn’t)…why people enjoy such things shall remain a mystery to me. At least throw in a rock of crack into the proceedings surely to have some kind of an affect, but no. Nothing but an evening of giggly boredom added with a pretentious air of continental sophistication I neither possessed nor could conjure should my life have depended on it.

 

Fourthly and much to my naivety or perhaps inexperience but I was quite intrigued to find quite a substantial population of Somali boys and girls all giggling and fluttering their lashes at eachother (The Holy ones included). Now I haven’t got a problem with young people getting to know each other and all but in places such as these? It bares a question mark at very least because it was as if I’d stepped into some sort of indangered species breeding programs for Somalis and Arabs of all kinds to mingle and blow out “ I love you” or “come get me” messages on their shisha pipes.

 

Very sophisticated indeed, whatever happened to old fashioned- waarya you look strong enough to carry the shopping bags, get up and let’s get married scenarios’? Perhaps I am part of a dying breed or the boring kind- I’ll allow you to draw your own ideas.

 

In conclusion

 

I didn’t particularly enjoy myself I was uncomfortable with the closed in and off surroundings not to mention atmosphere and I doubt I shall be returning to one any time soon as it holds little appeal to me after my experience.

 

But the question I’d like to put to you all is why are such places popular? (I have a few ideas but I’ll like to hear your views on the matter)

 

Have any of you guys been to such places? If so have you noticed the trend to socialise and hang around such rubbish joints? Or perhaps your of the frame of mind to enjoy these places? Whatever your experience speak now or forever hold your peace.

[NGONGE]

^^ First of all, a 'goy' is what the yehood use to call non yehoods.

 

Secondly, shiisha is great.

 

Thirdly, all these ruin the damn thing.

 

Fourth,

 

They're all addicted, silly.

 

Fifth,

They say curiosity killed the cat lakin bisad qufacday adaa ogo horiyaay.

 

Sixth,

nice piece.

[Chocolate and Honey]

@ "waryaa you look strong to carry the bags lets get married."

 

why people enjoy such things shall remain a mystery to me.

I second that! I was once coerced by a group of Shiisha-loving cults to try one of these ungodly Egyptian "restaurants" aka Shiisha joints: " Try the food" they coaxed, "the desert is to die for." And try I did. I had the sudden urge to sprint when we got inside. God, with the dim lights, flowery walls, and the thick smoke-filled atmosphere, I wanted to puke my guts out :eek: . The place was packed and crowded; groups of mixed people, smelly Egyptians and more Somali females than I expected. This is how the rest of my evening went ( or should I say the rest of the hour that I stayed before I bolted):

Me: Asl Clykum. Umm… can I see the Menu plz?

Filthy and horny looking Egyptian waiter: You want the menu? I'm the menu..oh. are you married?

Me: * staring at the man in disbelief * I would like to see the Menu. I heard the desert is good.

The waiter: you Somali girls are beautiful, yes! I wanna marry a Somali girl. *Winks and makes other strange gestures* Are you married?

My Friend’s husband: yes she is. Can I have the usual?

The waiter: Ok. * looks at my friend and asks the same question * My friend's husband jumps in and says "thats my wife." * He then looks at me and says "But you can divorce him you know?"

Me: This conversation is really inappropriate, you know?

Waiter: Okk.

Then my friend’s husband ordered something for me and they brought the shiisha. There is nothing “fruity” about it. It has strong awful smell and a hit of whatever fruit flavor you ordered. Plus it has twice the amount of Nicotine in a cigarette. Minutes later, a group of middle-aged men with bulging bellies sat the table next to us and started making obscene gestures at us and the Somali girls at the table right behind us. Then the owner came and made some inappropriate jokes at the expense of Somali women in general :mad: . Here is what I observed before I bolted vowing to never come back again:

1st. Shiisha places are not healthy because of the concentration of tobacco.

2nd. Most Middle-aged Arab men at these places come there to “hook up” hence the ball scratching and inappropriate sexual comments.

3rd. Middle-Aged Arab men and Somali men think women who frequent these places are cheap hence the lack of respect. I doubt they will talk you like that if they met you at a grocery store.

4th. Shiisha places are “hook up” places. Seriously when did tobacco sharing become romantic?

And finnally Shiisha is neither healthy nor a culture for us. And it is not fruit, I repeat :mad: .

[Paragon]

Anything atmospherically and decoratively Arab sends me into a hateful bout of utter destestation. The loud music (aka ambience?) got to me more than anything. I didn't see the Shisha as a problem then 8 or 9 years ago when we were the only Somalis (adults) in the joints, but not the teens populating them now. I'd rather smoke from a chimney.

[Chimera]

Chocolate&Honey - Imagine a group of Yemeni girls entering a Somali Marfiish ordering several bundles of Khat and then imagine them chewing it right in front of the Somali male population, what would the Somali male reaction be? I've never been to a Marfiish or ever chewed that Satanic plant but if i saw that group of Yemeni girls entering one and i was one of those corrupt characters high on Khat, i would think they were a bunch of 'loose women' and probably would hit on them ALOT

 

Thats how men are programmed

 

You might think this is different to your story, but fact is you guys don't belong there. Somali women like Yemeni women have their own domain and that's eachother houses where the only men are your relatives( or your friends relatives).

 

If i was single a Disco/club/Shishajoi nt/Marfiish would be the last places on earth i would look for a girl.

[The_Siren]

LOL@Chocolate- Wallahi your conversation sounds so very similar its quite amusing and I agree with everything you’ve said. Pst what most people don’t know is that Shisha is worse that cigarette smoke as its not even purified. Plus your right it doesn’t taste fruity but it smells like it (that’s if you can stomach that other weird shisha-stinking smell I have no idea comes from)..ps I also I got the impression that these filthy Arabs were used to speaking with and using Somali females in such a manner. Bares the question, are there Somali ladies out there ruining our reputation? I can only hope not though reality tells me otherwise.

 

Paragon- I share in your hate of all things arab as well. LOL-I believe its in all Somali people to hate Arabs and xabashiis. hehehe (No offense to any Arabs or insectopians of course)

 

Adam you make a good point but unlike Qaad I don’t think there’s as much taboo to arab women smoking it as there is in our culture and woman chewing qaad. In any case-these places often masquerade as restaurants, that is why most ladies or people go there, to eat-or at least that’s how it was sold to me and others. The Shisha didn’t particularly appeal to me never has never will but I thought? Hell you’ve been rejecting it for ages why not go and see for yourself. So I don’t see how these “restaurateurs” can get away with sexually harassing their customers sending us running to hide in our homes. I’m thinking a letter to watch dog is in hand.

 

Ps Boo to trying to lock us in our houses, I don't bloody think so Somali women and Yemenis are not the same, similar culture but we're not the same. Somali's go out to resturants all the time its usually not an issue and certainly no reason to hide in our homes for fear of whistling horny degenerates.

 

Ngonge- I've editted for your delight..rejoice good man your observance warms me.

[-Lily-]

It's a filthy disgusting habit, why is it so popular? Because most are sheep and follow the flock. I suspect it's a phase people get into and move on from, minus the addicts.

[Chimera]

Siren when i was in Yemen i didn't let my female siblings out of my sight, not for a second, and i'm not a control freak just a guy looking out for the safety of his sisters. Arab countries and even Japan are notorious for sexual harrassment against 'foreign women', and this is why i said you guys dont belong there because you and your girls could go to a hundred western restaurants and you still wont have the same bad experience as C&H had at that Shisha joint(say what you want to say about 'Western culture' but this is one thing i admire about the west). Why would you put yourself in potential danger by entering cultural spheres that are inherent chauvanistic and masculine? Fact is if your brothers or Somali male friends accompanied you or C&H in those 'shady places' you would never have gotten those type of reactions.

 

I'm not trying to lock you up anywhere, my father never restricted my mother from going anywhere she pleases, the fact that she invited her friends for Shaah, xalwo and a closet full of gossip or left to one of her friends houses to do the same, instead of going to a restaurant full of strangers is by no means a sign of 'male oppression' but simply 'Somali culture'

 

Youngsters see everything 'Somali culture' as 'oppression' these days, i dont get it.

[Chocolate and Honey]

You might think this is different to your story, but fact is you guys don't belong there. Somali women like Yemeni women have their own domain and that's eachother houses where the only men are your relatives( or your friends relatives).

Adam, have you noticed we're agreeing ? First of all, I only went there because it says "restaurant" not Marfish: Second, I'm always tempted by ethnic deserts(sue me) And third, my intention was no to smoke anything be it water or fruit or tobacco. And I wil NEVER EVER visit such places and will discourage from anyone especially sisters to visit such place.

[Chimera]

Thats good sister! Shady dark places full of smoke are not my thing.

 

Why dont you order those deserts by phone?

[Blessed]

Not all Arabic restaurants are sleazy shisha dungeons, there are some decent restaurants, with great food.

 

Similarly, there are many Somali 'restaurants' that I wouldn't even walk in front off in London and I few (err. one) where can relax and have a nice meal with friends - without getting harassed. Also, in general, you have your bar restaurants and normal restaurants. So there's always a decent, classy alternative. For those who want it.

[Chimera]

btw wasnt indoor smoking of 'any kind' outlawed?

 

Did i miss something?

[Chocolate and Honey]

Yes it was banned but they put forth an appeal on "culutural and religous" practices of sort but they still have strong opposition.

Blessed

I dont know about London, sis. But where I live, almost all Arab "restaurants" are also shiisha joints. Thats where the money is.

[The_Siren]

Adam, I too agree with you and commend you in your heroic protection of your sisters in Yemen but did not hear Chocolates story? Was she not accompanied by her friend’s very husband and was along with his wife not harassed and inappropriately propositioned with her own husband in tow? They no doubt thought it hilarious and perfectly acceptable to paw and drool over women in such instances. Moroccans, Algerians and north African Arabs are infamous for their amorous billa cedab dhillo like tactics its no surprise friend.

 

Also I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with staying at home inviting friends over to eat and laugh with as it usually more often the case with me (if I’m honest) but sometimes we ladies wish to have fresh air and eat out. This is hardly rebelling against our cultural customs as Somali restaurants are littered all over the west and Somalia/Somaliland- and I’ve never received the kind of obscene gestures I have whilst being in that shisha joint. Those Arab live in the west and thus they should abide by their rules somewhat at the very least, besides it wasn’t as if were in any foreseeable danger we went as a group, the restaurant was open plan and I had 999 on stand by on my mobile phone should any uppity arab forget his place. LOL I understand your polite concern as a fellow Somali brother but surely the chances of being raped surrounded by my fellow sisters and a large group of Somali men plus other westerners in a packed and busy “restaurant” right bang in the centre of london isn’t that great.

 

Were I in a seedy shisha joint full of men by myself in some deserted Arabian peninsula my confidence and cocksure attitude wouldn’t obviously be as potent and visible as it is now. I’d probably carry a handful of duqus in my purse just incase.

 

Still these aren't the arab badlands if a mother beeper tries anything over here a nice dacas to the face should solve everything

[Chimera]

I admit i quikly shifted through C&H post as i was busy earlier today so i didnt catch that part, i'm suprised that they would act in such a manner in the presence of a male friend. I'm loyal to the principle called 'tit for tat' and probably would have started making jokes about Egyptian women in a situation like that.

 

I really hope what you say is true, Insha-allah may nothing bad happen to you and your mates in places like that. I know a Dutch female classmate whose drink was once spiked in a club, she was violated yet she doesnt remember a thing(she became pregnant), it just shows you the resources these shady characters have at their disposal these days, so becareful.