Xalimopatra Posted June 9, 2008 BTW Also... I only just got to read this post in full. I am appalled at how some of you have cheapened our Somalia-bound women.Believe it or not they do have a choice [even xoolo have a choice] and should not be advertised online like a pair of Jordans on Ebay. It's actually tragic since someone like Jaceyl Baro is back home and can talk like this.War orod oo shaqo qabo niyow. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kool_Kat Posted June 9, 2008 ^LOOOOL@pair of Jordans on Ebay! I know what you mean, I couldn't believe it either...And the worst part is when such comments are coming from another woman...Hableheenii bey bahdileen...Way oo way... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RedSea Posted June 10, 2008 Dear Cadaani, I would try to get away from the network that your wife introduce into. Maybe get a new guy friend that can hook you up with others that may not know too much about your life. Losing weight and getting education and what not I think has nothing to do with it. It's all going according To God's plan. So yeah little patience might do. Also don't give up just yet. Good luck friend. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baluug Posted June 10, 2008 Originally posted by Xalimopatra: Could this be what other Somali females think of you?Straight from the horses mouth, perhaps a relationship with a caucasian male is not exactly our definition of interesting either?...That is if you switch up what you wrote and apply it to you. So really it's not about your children after all but really about your personal [albeit groundless & prejudiced] preference.Dont get me wrong you're entitled to choose who you want but to cut out a whole race [which you come from] and to generalise them like that is disgusting and downright racist, might I add unacceptable in Islam. Sorry but I couldn't help but comment on such a hypocritical post.You've basically answered your own question. You shouldn't limit yourself where Allah SWT hasn't.You should change your mentality and perhaps Allah SWT will bless you with a wonderful MUSLIM wife regardless of her race. XPatra. I appreciate your comment, but I have to respectfully disagree with some of what you've said. First of all, it is all about my children whether you believe it or not, because I could just move to Toronto at the drop of a hat if I wanted where there are apparently from what I've been told, Somali sisters looking for a white Muslim brother and nothing but. But the fact of the matter is that my responsibilities as a Muslim father dictate that I remain with them wherever they are until they get old enough to take care of themselves, being a father involves more than just paying child support. Besides, they are the most important part of my life and like I said before, insha Allah they will be the ones making du'a for me after I die and Allahu aclam, that may be the "make or break" factor on if I make it to jannah or not, you just never know. My older daughter Layla was heartbroken just from thinking about not seeing her best friend ever again when we were originally planning to move to Toronto. How then will she react when she realizes her father has moved miles away and is more concerned with remarrying than he is concerned about her? You'd better believe my children come first, for the sake of Allah SWT. Also, and I'm not singling you out on this, because I think others probably think the same way, but I wonder how likely it is that when a Somali man wants only a Somali wife, that he will be told that his preferences are "disgusting", "racist, "unacceptable in Islam", and "hypocritical"? I don't understand why I should get slagged for my preferences while it would be seemingly OK for someone else. I apologize if I'm wrong. It's kind of funny when I think that now that I've finally set a goal in life for myself, people are mad at me for it! Sheeko..... I truly enjoy Somali culture(most of it, anyway) and I put a lot of time and effort into learning it. It's not easy to learn how to eat rice and spaghetti with your hands, you know As a white Canadian who has adopted a new religion, I cannot just simply live like I did before, I had no choice but to adopt a new culture and since I have known Somalis since even before I became a Muslim, it was a no-brainer for me to sort of take the Somali way of life as my own. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
peasant Posted June 10, 2008 ^waryaa pray for me i will pray for you that we both get very good wives.. amen Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Abtigiis Posted June 10, 2008 ^^Peasant: wali ma odaygii sikhraanka ahaa ee gadhka xumaa baad is horwadaa? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NGONGE Posted June 10, 2008 Originally posted by Xalimopatra: BTW Also... I only just got to read this post in full. I am appalled at how some of you have cheapened our Somalia-bound women.Believe it or not they do have a choice [even xoolo have a choice] and should not be advertised online like a pair of Jordans on Ebay. It's actually tragic since someone like Jaceyl Baro is back home and can talk like this.War orod oo shaqo qabo niyow. Nobody is being cheapened here, m'dear. A man is looking for a wife and the people here are telling him to go to Somalia to find such a wife. Apparently, some Somali women would love to marry out of their culture (just as Cadaan would, is he cheap?). In all of this the main word, the most important action and the only relevant thing is MARRIAGE. (Have a word with yourself). Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Xalimopatra Posted June 10, 2008 Cadaan; 1)I said and still maintain that your preference is NOT for your children but for yourself like you said "I truly enjoy Somali culture(most of it, anyway) and I put a lot of time and effort into learning it" Your children's Mother is alive and she can still maintain their Somali heritage.If and only when their Mother was not around then I would totally understand your reasoning. 2)Please spare me the guilt trip I never suggested for you to leave your children.I said that your preference was for you so why you are telling me how/why you would relocate has nothing to do with what I said.In all honesty my 1st post were I gave advice actually said " think you should perhaps move out of Calgary (only if the ex wife complies and brings the kids which is kinda difficult but try)" so dont even imply or explain why you would not move away. 3)Your reasoning on Somali on Somali marriage is pretty ******.How can you compare a man marrying a woman from his own race to one who has cut out his own race for a potential wife?A Somali man who says "I dont want a Somali girl ...she is boring blabla" is comparable to you but not the example you gave and yes he would be considered racist and disgusting. What you need to understand is Somalis are a race and for them to marry another Somali is due to them being around them.It's unlikely for them to disregard the potential [somali] mates around them and then jump into another racial pool.Of all the Somalis that I know who are married to Non-Somalis I've never heard them say that they specifically desired a Non Somali and that they would never marry if they could not find that person from the set race that they were talking about like you LOL! NGONGE why dont you introduce Cadaan to one of your relatives in Somalia then? Girls in Somalia preferring specifically white males?Speak for you and yours lakiin dont speak for everyone. Good luck and best wishes Cadaan. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chubacka Posted June 10, 2008 Hello Cadaan, for what it's worth, here is my advice, 1) Make dua, ask Allah sincerely to help you. 2) You say you are not overly religious but it might give you some peace and contentment to get to learn more about Islam and get closer to Allah. 3) It may be that you would be better off with a non-somali woman, dnt limit yourself. Most importantly be patient and keep urself busy and active, dnt waste your time waiting for Ms right. Tk salaams (we appreciate your honestly and I hope you found comments useful) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baluug Posted June 10, 2008 Xalimopatra, the last thing I want is an argument, so let's just agree to disagree The fact of the matter is that I know what I want, and I won't settle for anything else. If that seems racist and disgusting, then so be it, but I don't see anything wrong with that. This trip to London has sort of revitalized me, I realize now that I'm back home that this vacation was something I really needed, and I am now taking steps to further myself and instead of dwelling on my negatives, I'm working on my positives. Chubacka, all these comments are useful and I'm taking heed. Thank you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
N.O.R.F Posted June 10, 2008 Off topic Where is your 'vacation' report? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baluug Posted June 10, 2008 ^You know what? I forgot all about that!! Insha Allah I'll have that done tonight plus another topic I want to start about what I said in my post above about how I'm furthering myself, but I'm about to get out of the house pretty soon, got some things to do today, then it's off to work for probably 12 hours again. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NGONGE Posted June 10, 2008 Originally posted by Xalimopatra: NGONGE why dont you introduce Cadaan to one of your relatives in Somalia then? Girls in Somalia preferring specifically white males?Speak for you and yours lakiin dont speak for everyone. Good luck and best wishes Cadaan. Oh look! A xenophobe that can't read. Ps If I had a relative whose that way inclined I would have happily introduced them to the man (since I met him and have an idea of what he's like). Nay, I'd introduce him to my own sister if her dream in life was to marry a non-Somali Muslim. Sadly (for him), I have no free sisters. It is not prostitution, you bigot. It is marriage. A xalaal marriage. If you and yours don't do it then that's just your shortcoming really. Nothing to brag about. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
