DERMAN the SOL protector.. Give it up to him

[Jaabir]

The charges against Lakkad are brought in the name of the Somalia On Line Highest Criminal court. They are being tried by a court of distinguished nomads who known for their moderateness.

The responsibilities thus imposed upon the defendant “Lakkad”, prosecutors and judges alike, are grave and unusual. It is owed, not only to the nomads whom topics were stolen by the defendant but to everybody who frequented SOL and made it part of daily internet routine..

A very high obligation, your honor, runs to the Nomads the scourge of Lakkad’s plagiarizing crimes was laid upon. The mere punishment of Lakkad can never redress the terrible injuries Lakkad visited on these unfortunate Nomads. For them it is (including this writer) far more important that Lakkad’s is exposed and presented in his true colors before all of SOL members who represent the voice of humanity. So as prosecutes myself and Underdog are hereby requesting from your honor to stamp Lakkad’s azz , and the Nomads who engerner him as barbarous and criminal.

 

 

But before we go there your honor, in terms of procedure, as I understand them, the defendant “Lakkad” has blatantly requested to represent himself and, consequently, he made the opening for his trial by publicly threatening me to disclose some lies and propaganda aimed at stirring the focus from his heinous crime.. so I request from your honor the following

 

 

1- add one count of threatening to the list of charges

2- dismiss anyone who talking on his behalf

 

Thank you your honor..

[Macalin]

HEHe...am adding a new LAWYER ..Let me CONTACT EM and see what they say

[x_quizit]

"But before we go there your honor, in terms of procedure, as I understand them, the defendant “Lakkad” has blatantly requested to represent himself and, consequently, he made the opening for his trial by publicly threatening me to disclose some lies and propaganda aimed at stirring the focus from his heinous crime.. so I request from your honor to dismiss anyone talking on his behalf."

 

The defense requests the finger pointer to the stand, ie Darman....Let the interrogation begin....questions to be asked:

 

1-if Lakkad's alleged reply to expose u were "lies", why are u hot under to collar? shouldn't the truth prevail if indeed he's espousing lies????

 

2-when did he represent himself? I implore ur LuckyNess to check the post where Lakkad asked me and athena to represent him, therefore darman's logic is unfounded and may be a product of guilt

 

3-The Judge cannot dismiss a defense lawyer, and her job, her LuckyNess is to be a fair moderator not to pick and choose who can represent whom.

 

The Defense calls upon Darman to issue a statement of why the issue of the alleged plagiarism couldn't be discussed among them, b4 putting it in front of the SOL members? or why not just the alleged injured parties rather than trying to discredit Lakkad from future posts?

Ur LuckyNess, once again, the defense asks that u pay attn to the motive of the prosecutor.

[underdog]

Originally posted by x_quizit:

2-X and UD were embroiled ina tug of war where X won

Yeah I had that comedic nightmare too, woke up laughing like a mad-man. . Thats the last time I have chicken wings before I go to sleep.

[-Serenity-]

Oh gosh! Were was I all this time?

 

Anyways, to continue with the interrogation of the plaintiff aka Darman. I'd like PROOF that indeed lakkad IS VEVE. So far all we have are 2 nick names but absolutely no proof as to connection. I think this is a case of character assasination and nothing else. Also, having researched the matter, I've noted that VEVE claims to be from London and has claimed to be from that region since his onset in that forum. I'm sure, you the ladies and frogs of the jury realize that Lakkad doesn't reside anywhere within that little island. VEVE has over 1300 post to his credit and most of them were his own as far as we know. Taking a closer look, the writing styles of the accused has absolutely no bearing with that of the person with the nick VEVE. I ask her hunourable Luckyness to insist the prosecuting lawyer bring in some factual evidence rather than conceptual evidence on suspicion.

 

This is outrageous. Defamation of character at its lowest :@

 

I rest my case for now.

[underdog]

I call the DEFENDANT to the stand.

 

 

Lakkad a.k.a Nomad a.k.a Veve (Shamba kali). Please take the stand.

 

1) Did you do it?

 

 

p.s. Athena, where've you been? Your co-counsel needs some help. Now that saying about 'giving someone a long enough rope and they'll hang themselves' makes sense

 

Legal disclaimer: All conflicts presented is a state of Peace love and no grudges.

[Jaabir]

If your honor embrace the accusations of the self-hired defense of me singling out Lakkad for the sole purpose of assassinating his character to be true, it will be a sad and fatal thing for Somaliaonline and its distinguished members.

 

people who have never seen a decent forum like SOL are always callous about destroying the integrity of SOL. They may not even realize that they are obliterating anything worthwhile, for lack of a normal sense of values, they destabilize the integrity of Somaliaonline by pinning their faith in lunatics like Lakkad.

 

their views and recommendations, should we consider them, will put somaliaonline straight in the trash pin Somalinet has very well been known for.

 

Your honor the crimes which we are seeking to condemn and punish Lakkad for have been so calculated, so malignant, and so devastating, that Somaliaonline cannot tolerate their being ignored or un-dealt with simply because Somaliaonline cannot survive their being repeated.

 

Your honor, I refuse to discuss the details of my case against Lakkad with the tow self-hired X and Athena for the reasons I mentioned in my opening statement.

[x_quizit]

"You honor, I refuse to discuss the details of my case against Lakkad with the tow self-hired X and Athena for the reasons I mentioned in my opening statement."

 

Self-Hired? Ur LuckyNess I insist u look to Nomad's post where he hired me athena to represent him from this unfounded slander suit.

Also, for the person who brought this alleged suit against my esteemed client, for them to refuse to go to the stand and answer the defense lawyers ques, speaks volumes!!!! Guilt i tell ya!!! Based on that ur LuckyNess, i demand that this case be thrown out and be deemed a waste of SOL members time.

[Baashi]

Mistrial

 

The word has it that jurors and some of the expectators have been chasing their shades in utter confusion. Having been presented the "SOL trial", BIG BROTHER agency is considering a sweeping investigation on the matter.

 

The investigation, as the acclaimed MACNE MA LEH newpaper had reported, is looking into whether the undercover agent Darman had a warrant to dig deep into the Nomad's transgrassions, the accused Nomad's alleged crimes, and self-appointed judge Lucky's credentials.

 

Who has jurisdiction over the internet? Are the chit-chats posted on the SOL have a copy-right protection? Some of the nomads were asking questions along those lines.

[Valenteenah.]

**Door crashes open**

 

Click, click, click...

 

Barwaaqo lays her briefcase on the table, takes a deep breath and addresses the court...

 

As a member of the SOL community I'm UTTERLY OUTRAGED AND ABSOLUTELY APPALLED at the treatment of such an esteemed member of this site as lakkad by none other than that slander-mongering DARMAN! **Points angrily at the offending object** :mad:

 

I would also like to advice both the court (nods at the honourable judge Lucky) and the defendant to fire his incompetent lawyer, Ms X-Quizit!. Unlike Athena, (hey girl...nice blouse! )who defended her client with courage and unflinching loyalty, X-Quizit endangered the defendant's whole case by ASSUMING HE WAS GUILTY OF THE ALLEGED PLAGIARISM from the very beginning! If I could kindly draw the attention of the court to Exhibit A, an earlier quote from the inept laywer in question:

 

LoL Nomad, now u forced me to be on ur side, so I must defend u although I didn't agree with ur plagiarism, but im gonna let the lawyer in me come out.

This clearly shows X-Quizit to be implying that her client is guilty. Is this something a remotely clever laywer would dare say in front of the prosecution, jurors and the Judge? I say NO! *Thumps the table with her palm for dramatic effect* I myself believe that there's something revoltingly unhealthy going on between the chief prosecutor, Underdog, and the defendant's useless laywer X-Quizit. Perhaps X-Quizit believes sending Lakkad down for a crime he didnt commit will endear her to Mr Caveman? This whole trial has the nasty odour of a conspiracy. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, A CONSPIRACY! between those two unholy creatures! >>> **points dramatically at the two offending objects in question**

 

Now, as Lakkad's newly appointed barrister, I would like to request the court to DISMISS this shambles of a case due to the incompetence of the defense council (Sorry Athena...but what the hell were u doing letting X convict your client in your presence? :mad: ), and the sleazy and quite frankly illegal behind-the-scenes activities of Underdog and X-Quizit. **stares distastefully at the two-mentioned individuals b4 throwing her hair over her shoulder and looking away**

 

As for Darman, we believe he made up this whole story as a way of getting the attention of a certain SOL lady. One who rebuffed his attentions, we would like to point out, for those of Lakkad's. (Well, what do you expect? Lakkad is HOT!) **Smiles sexily at the defendant**

 

Therefore, this whole case is nothing but lies, lies and more lies, made up in order to get back at our client. Would the court please do as we suggest and lay this whole circus to bed?

 

Thank you Judge Lucky. Thank you members of the Jury. We know you'll do right by our client.

 

**Delicately sits down and crosses her legs**

[x_quizit]

LOL Barwaqo, I've never been so holy entertained or laughed so hard since ive been a member of SOL, how can u do this to me? Now it's on, Im gonna let a certain someone know why U are creating drama, waiting for his attn!! Ahem!

 

Ur honor, I implore u to dismiss Barwaqo's unfounded and emotional diatribe, and I'll tell ya the reasons why athena and I were a target.

 

1-because Lakkad choose us over her to represent him

2-because he informed her me and him were dating since hitler gassed the jews

3-because she realized her time was ticking and didn't want to enter her 40's without a sijui stallion by her side :rolleyes:

 

Reasons why ur honor shouldn't pay attn to Exhibit A:

1-because whether u believe ur client or not, a lawyer must do his/her best to defend them

2-because I saw more evidence and re-read Darman's topic, I came to realize that lakkad was not guilty of the alleged crime and hence I am defending him knowing he was telling the truth

3-because Barwaqo is jealous of my figure and wants attn by trying to discredit me (sorry sista, no all of us can be midgets with pudgy loveliness, too bad, so sad)

 

**Didn't want to get ugly, but u forced me to make u look at a mirror closely :mad:

Don't mess with the Best!

[-Serenity-]

To continue where my partner X-Quizit has left off,Your honour, I'm baffled as to what evidence against my client is. The perpetrator of this ungrounded court case Darman writes,

Your honor, I refuse to discuss the details of my case against Lakkad with the tow self-hired X and Athena for the reasons I mentioned in my opening statement.

He has so far presented no factual evidence before the court of law and his calculating claims amount to nothing but baseless accusations against my client. I ask the honourable Judge once more to demand the precuting team show their evidence.

[Cheeta]

A juror who was caught thinking out loud---

 

I wonder where is this self appointed judge. Why hasn’t she kept order in this court, for what we have is far more than plagiarism, but an act of grave crime committed by none other than Darman himself. Invasion of privacy is not to be taken lightly when compared that to plagiarism, and I wont be so surprised if he were at this very moment snooping to the whereabouts of the judge. I say what we have here is a stalker! Ladies do remember to carry ur pepper spray for this is not the time to walking casually when there is a madman on the loose!

[Valenteenah.]

LooooOOOOOOoooooL!!!!! @ X...

 

**Sharpens her claws**

 

This is war!

 

I categorically deny the claim that I am jealous of X-Quizit's figure. As if!! ** Quickly takes out her compact mirror to check her appearance** (Ahh...Just as I thought...I look thoroughly ravishing ).

 

I'm afraid X does not have a leg to stand on. The case is clear cut...X-QUIZIT is just plain incompetent. It is a miracle she was able to finish Law School. Then again, if I recall, she did get her qualifications from 'abroad'. Probably the Cayman Islands.

 

But I digress from the issue at hand. I am sure your honour agrees with me (looking earnestly at lucky) that the complete disregard shown by X-quizit in trying to defend Lakkad at the beginning makes her unfit as a lawyer. Therefore, only a dismissal will do at this stage.

 

Now, in order to clear my name, I would like to address some of X's supposed reasons for my presence in court today --->

 

One, Lakkad specifically requested my help and expertise in clearing his name. I'm sure he realised his mistake in hiring two untrained heffers almost immediately. He was always such a smart lad.

 

For another, I couldn't give a monkey's whether X once dated Lakkad centuries ago. I'm sure even she was somewhat handsome once upon a time. Lakkad has of course confessed all his terrible mistakes to me b4hand, and I have duly forgiven him for past indiscretions.

 

And finally, could X stop flirting with Legend of Zu, please? Its wholly unbecoming. Not only is he from Darman's camp, but he is also a married man for God's sake. How can one trust such a laywer I ask? **Makes eye contact with each of the Jury to drive the point home**

 

 

Athena does not have to be dismissed. She can assist me in the case. **Hands Athena a Ribena**...such a hard-working assistant.

 

Shall we have a recess for lunch your honour? (Eager to treat Judge Lucky to lunch)...

[-Serenity-]

You honour, I hereby make a plea for the dismissal of the self-appointed lawyer Barwaaqo. Her demeanour shows incompetence and lack of professionalism. She seems to have come here as a publicity stunt to boost her deminishing reputation in the feild. The defendends lawyers me and X-Q plead with you to remove her from the case. Her attitude of one of self-promotion and she lacks basic understanding of the case. Coming in here denouncing my partner's (ha! assistant ma ***! ) accredited qualifications just shows she is interested in promoting herself as opposed to winning a case for the defendent Lakkad