An Important Man

[NGONGE]

I was in a takeaway shop the other week. My wife was with me and as we ordered our food (we moved house and things were upside down at the time), I noticed that there was a First Aid certificate on the wall behind. I asked the guy where was the nearest First Aid centre. The man tried to make himself look taller and started going on about the certificate. It turns out it was his brother that did the First Aid course. This is how the crazy conversation went:

 

He: you can’t get that. It is a hard course to pass and only important people can do it. My younger brother is an important man and he earns loads of money.

 

Me: Really? What does he do?

 

He: He’s a supervisor at Macdonalds.

 

My wife: MacDonalds? Are you serious?

 

He (not getting the question): Yes. He is in charge of many people. Very important man. Only big people like him can do First Aid courses.

 

Me (playing along): Good for him. Hard work always has its rewards.

 

Him: My other brother is also important. He has his own business and is in charge of sixty people. They all work under him. He is a big man (these are his exact words by the way), he earns 60k per year.

 

My wife (looking really disgusted with the whole thing) asks: not at Macdonalds too?

 

Him: No. He owns a big factory. Sixty people work for him.

 

Me: What about you? Are you not important too?

 

Him (acting all humble): No. I do not like to call myself important. I own two businesses and two houses. I have been in the UK for twenty years. I work very hard but I am not important. My brothers are very important.

 

Me: Where is that First Aid centre anyway? Let me try my luck. They might just accept me and allow me to do the course.

 

Him: No. No. It is a course for important people. You have to have been in the UK for at least twenty years and you have to have a good job. Do you earn 60 k or more?

 

Me: hmmmm..err..

 

My wife tries to speak and boast but I shut her up with a pinch.

 

Him: If you work hard, like I and my brothers did, one day you too will earn 60k.

 

Me: do you think they will let me do the First Aid course then?

 

Him: Maybe. But you have to work on your English too.

 

At this point my wife can not control herself and starts a long argument about what a pointless man he is and that supervisors at MacDonalds are not that important, etc.

 

Him (all nice and cool): you don’t understand business. I understand business and own two of my own. Do you have your own business?

My wife: No. But that does not mean I can not see that you are talking total rubbish.

 

Him: That is because you are thinking like a layperson and do not understand how business works. Maybe after twenty years in the UK you will learn. We all started this way but worked very hard to become important people.

 

My wife stormed out and refused to buy his food as I followed her out laughing my head off. She actually did not talk to me for the rest of the day. Heh.

 

Ps

I did the First Aid course and it only costs £300. I would just like everyone to know that I am now an important man.

[Valenteenah.]

OMG! I just realised my new laptop doesn't have the pound sign!! Stup!d American keyboards.

 

Anyway, did you say the course costs 300 pounds? WTF?

 

An important man, indeed.

[STOIC]

This was hilarious! I bet you this was an Egyptian guy or a Somali.I guess the insecure heart questions, “Am I that important” ?

 

EDIT:I said Egyptian because the few I met in the academia likes to brag (the Sudanese are more educated, but very humble).I picked on Somali (including me here) because we always like to brag about our family members accomplishment!

[MZanzi]

hehehehe Ngonge I guess you have to act now like an Important man

[rudy-Diiriye]

somali business...is so crazy these days!! i met this xalimoo..she hasnt work for yrs, but she has business...

 

i ask what her what kinda of business she does...answer... i sell stuff..u do..i just said awesome babe gal. i havent given her an answer yet when i am gonna visit her back.... pure mafia

[N.O.R.F]

I'm guessing he is from the sub-continent.

 

Ngonge, put it on your expenses saxib

[NGONGE]

^^ But of course. He was Bengali by the way. At one point, he was going on about how his people were in the UK before any Somalis set foot in the place. I just chuckled and said 'sure sure' but my mad wife was just dying to give him a history lesson.

[N.O.R.F]

Hindidu waa sidaa. Success means alot to them and they're not afraid to brag about it however misplaced.

 

Welcome to your new neighbourhood. Keep us posted

[NGONGE]

^^ Actually, my new neighbourhood has more cadaan than hindi in it. Maybe it's just my side!

[nuune]

lol@important man,

 

Ngonge, remember, you are now carrying a life saving jacket, u r as important as a doctor of medicine.

 

 

I think my First Aid Cert expired, had it when I was coaching footie long ago.

[N.O.R.F]

^^me too. Can't find it.

[Ibtisam]

LOOOOOL LOOOL important man

[Abwaan]

Originally posted by NGONGE:

I would just like everyone to know that I am now an important man.

looooooooooool............You are important man bro...therefore you should go back to Mr Important and tell him that you are now important...lol...to be honest it is worth completing this course as you never know that you will need to do the CPR on someone waiting for the bus or in a McDonalds queue one day.

[Gheelle.T]

That was hilarious walahi..Darn them Indian, Pakis, and Bengals take "bragging"thing to whole another level..

[Baluug]

Wow this thread is full of important men, I don't think I even have the privilege of posting in here LOL if this guy thinks a First aid certificate is so important, just imagine what wouls happen if he saw a paramedic, he'd probably faint!