Cindrella Posted September 18, 2005 Everyone feels shy sometimes, but being too shy can hamper many aspects of your life. Determine why you're shy in the first place. For example, are you scared of what someone might say about your physical appearance? Remember, there's an underlying reason for how you react in situations. Act as if you're not shy. In private, behave as if you're oozing confidence. Hold your chin up, stick your chest out, add a swagger to your walk and speak firmly. It may seem ridiculous, but you will see results when you're out in public. Practice making eye contact and smiling in your interactions with others. Strike up casual conversations with strangers about weather or current events. Look your best. One way to improve self-consciousness is to always look good and limit ways you can be self-critical. Lower your fear of rejection by imagining the worst possible outcome. If you approach someone, they may say "no" or they may just walk away. Absolutely everybody has been rejected at some point, but no one has to dwell on it. Look and learn. Watching friends or even strangers who aren't shy is a good way to learn some tips first-hand. Feel positive about yourself, don't get frustrated and have fun. Remember, the real goal is to find someone who will like you for who you are. Ciao! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cindrella Posted September 18, 2005 It could be that simple to make a friend. A simple "Hello, how are you doing?" Nobody says that you have to make instant friends. A quick little conversation here and there may end up creating friendships that will last a very long time. Be brave - do it! Ciao! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
N.O.R.F Posted September 18, 2005 My advice on shyness would,,,,,be confident, you have one life to live, make the most of it and dont give a hoot about other ppls opinions but have good manners towards all peace Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Warrior of Light Posted September 18, 2005 ^^^Couldnt have said it better. Ah, you can add a joke or light humour to break the ice.But dont over do it.You just want a smile and not to be mocked or called weird. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jamelia Posted September 18, 2005 I have a problem with shyness sometimes. For example I never start a conversation with someone I don't know..When they talk to me I never say more than three words....Somehow people mistake this for arrogance .... The good friends I have now all of them approached me...They all thought I was a arrogant B^^^^ when they first met me....Somehow what I feel inside and what people see..are two tottaly different things........thats a good thing I suppose. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pucca Posted September 18, 2005 ^^i have the same problem too; my sister on the other hand will start a convo with anyone even strangers on the bus... is it wrong to want to keep to yourself and not interact with ppl you dont know? :rolleyes: who needs to talk to strangers anyway... best way to over come shyness: walk,feel, and believe you're hot. :cool: *DO NOT over do it* Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miriam1 Posted September 18, 2005 lol Jamelia i so relate, many of my friends, felt I was so cold and unapproachable in the start. I just dont make eye contact with people. heh. But u relize that life is short and ur simply wasting time stumbling over your words, you better go and get what you want..in this world and the only way u can do that is by Being BOLD...and Beautiful..hehe.lol..no, hmh just BOLD, take control of every suitation...do your best to know everything and be aware of your surrondings all the time. Shy is cute to a limit. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cindrella Posted September 19, 2005 Lool Jamelia i use to have the same problem as well too sister.Esecially with the whole idea with making eye contact with everyone you meet. But as time past i over came my shyness step by step. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NoVa Posted September 19, 2005 In a way Shyness is Beautifull. I don't see anything wrong with being shy. Just because u keep it to urself or isn't one of those people that interact with others doesn't mean u don't have confidence or ur arrogant. It mean's u just aren't outloud like some others r. Everyone has a limit where their confortable.....FOr those who say their suffering from 'shyness', ur good cuz many people wish that they had that 'shyness'within themselves. Just remember that Xishood is a beautifull thang in islam... p.s Note2Self....practise being SHY.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Modesty Posted September 19, 2005 I don't understand why shyness is treated like a disease. Everyone doesn't need to be outgoing and loud to be a good human being and become successful. I personally think people who talk frivolously are so superficial.In America, there is the saying "strongest survives", so in order to be seen as strong, one must act loud and social and step on everyone else like a ladder. Where is the compassion in this? Everyone in society doesn't have to be loud and outgoing, people come in different packages. I think shy people are really smart and deep. Being shy doesn't mean you can't achieve your goals and be successful. I know alot of people who beat themselves for not meeting societies expectation of what "normal" is. I think "normal" is crazy if you ask me. My point is, be who you are and if someone doesn't like you for that, they aren't important to begin with. I used to always worry about what people thought about me, I tried to mirror my life according to what the community expected from me, and I faced many disappointments because of it. I learned that people are complex, and to be happy with who you are you have to please yourself, and be happy with who you are without hurting other people in the process, since as muslims we must be considerate of others. If you're shy, good for you! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Strawberry_Xu Posted September 19, 2005 My no.1 ice breaker with anyone: Have a roll of sweets or mints handy, pretend you're having one yourself and then offer it to the person sitting next to you. Even if they don't accept, they'll still think you're nice. And I usually end up chatting to people. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Intel Posted September 19, 2005 stranger sits next to you and offers you a mint means that you have a awfully bad breath, Xu thus if you did sit next to me and put forward a mint i wouldn’t think you nice at all… i’d give you the evils, get-up and leave Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rahima Posted September 19, 2005 ^ You should be happy that she would be willing to tell you that your breath stinks rokko. I'd let you stink . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AdivA Posted September 19, 2005 Salam, All the advice here is very handy and appreciative. I know I definately have a problem with speaking to strangers and some people think I'm stuck up and rude...that is until they get to know me All in all...just relax and let loose..just a little bit..not too much and remember people are just people...not things that are out there to get ya Peace Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AdivA Posted September 19, 2005 Salam, All the advice here is very handy and appreciative. I know I definately have a problem with speaking to strangers and some people think I'm stuck up and rude...that is until they get to know me All in all...just relax and let loose..just a little bit..not too much and remember people are just people...not things that are out there to get ya Peace Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
