Som@li Posted February 25, 2004 A/c. A question that was bugging me for some time to our intelligent somali women,,would u initiate a "dating" with some guy whom u like, if for some reason the guy does't make the first move?? if yes,how,,wat would u do? If u liked a guy,and u think u might be good together,would tell him about it , i heard this is difficult not only to somali women,but to all.so i just wanted to know what u think? wasalaam Ali Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
7_steps_2_Heaven Posted February 25, 2004 naah, no way bruv....that's a big NO-NO. if he doesnt make the move, u move on, period. it's to do with pride.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
N.O.R.F Posted February 25, 2004 ^^^pride aint always a good virtue, plus its a leap year this year, so go ahead and swallow that pride and say what you feel ladies Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
7_steps_2_Heaven Posted February 25, 2004 ^^ Geee....that's not how we've been raised Norf..lets say I'm checking a broda out, im giving him some hints na mean, but if he doesn't get it then it's adios. life is tooo short to run after a guy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
N.O.R.F Posted February 25, 2004 ^^aahh hints, the thing we just cant comprehend,,,,be foreever hinting cos we will never get it unless its in BLACK AND WHITE Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bambina Posted February 25, 2004 Salam Alaykum, I think women should initiate the dating process for a change, that would make things easy for the brothas ,lol. We, women have been raised to give some hints and let the guyz do the first move. We should do the opposite. I think its hard for both women and men to initiate the dating because of the fear of being rejected.But,if guyz can swallow their pride and take some risks why not the girls? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lol Posted February 25, 2004 I would only IF he is worth it ... as to what I would do, simple " Yo brotha I think I am digging you so wanna go out my treat " Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nin-Yaaban Posted February 25, 2004 Originally posted by Hibo: I would only IF he is worth it ... as to what I would do, simple " Yo brotha I think I am digging you so wanna go out my treat " There is habbit among Soomaali men to see women who approach them (and ask for dates) as a useless sluts who hit on every man (jamaicans, blacks). so unless you want to come across like that, i suggest you do it in traditional way. and how do you do it in a traditional manner? simple, ask your parents (father) to talk to his parents (father, mother dont mother) and if he is available for marriage. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rudy-Diiriye Posted February 25, 2004 lol! i just cant stop laughing!! hes back!!lol.. reality check ladies! hah! and the new ones! run for cover!! lol.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mis_Nasima Posted February 25, 2004 Originally posted by Bambina: [QB] Salam Alaykum, I think women should initiate the dating process for a change, that would make things easy for the brothas ,lol. I was actually thinking the same thing recently not to make things easy for men thou but for as women so we can choose who we want to approach instead of ppl u don't want approaching u. But as long as there are guys like Nin-yabaan it ain't gonna happen. So i say why not let the men do the work and for as to just sit a select. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Intizaar Posted February 26, 2004 Bambina, so what happens if really like the guy, but he never makes the move? I would let him know, what do I got to loose? Either he will say he is availabe, seeing some one, or not ready, but its much better wondering and regreting for not doing some thing about it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miriam1 Posted February 26, 2004 Dating is haram...it can only lead to the wrong..it is a delicate matter...i would spark conversation not in hope of anything but in search of a simple conversation to see, to hear, to know if there is a way for possibly..for a maybe, a we? If there exists Mutual attraction and understanding the next step should be taken with consideration towards the proper parties involved, ie ur parents... Ps. I wasnt quite sure what u meant by dating..if it was the westernized form of, "lets go for dinner and drinks" or if it was what i mentioned above! Peace... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Som@li Posted February 26, 2004 thank u all for sharing ur ideas and thoughts, and also for being bold,i liked ur ideas. Bambina: I think its hard for both women and men to initiate the dating because of the fear of being rejected quite true indeed! Nin-Yaaban: There is habbit among Soomaali men to see women who approach them (and ask for dates) as a useless sluts who hit on every man bro this is some of the stereotype which we wanna get rid off,but when u say among somalis, it may not be right as u implying all! Zarinaz: wasnt quite sure what u meant by dating i mean the somali way of dating,,not the western way!.how abt if u knw n talk to each other tha one u like,and he does't make the move?? bye ali Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miriam1 Posted February 26, 2004 ^^ I dont know to me personally at that moment of time it would be very very very clear that the affection is one from one side. If a person really cared, it would be obvious to u and them, to ask is to push (in my opinion)...you made ur move...obviously they dont care enough to make their move...so move on to the next dude on the line heh! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
7_steps_2_Heaven Posted February 26, 2004 ^^ rudy is that U man? ... u were classes? wiil yar oo joobane aan kuu haysaty! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites